


A New Life A New Hope

by Bigbluenationmember



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-06
Updated: 2017-08-17
Packaged: 2018-11-28 15:38:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 68,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11421030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bigbluenationmember/pseuds/Bigbluenationmember
Summary: what if rose didnt choose the metacrisis? what if she decided to stay with the original doctor? what would happen to all three of them. would the 'new' doctor be able to find love or move on from his beloved rose or would his brother drop him off on some random planet not barcelona





	1. Decisions, Decisions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the doctor has to make a heart wrenching decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> until we get into the heart of the story 10 is dr. brown and 10.2 is dr. blue. once the story gets to a certain point then their real aliases come in

**Prologue:**

“I love you Stormie” she smiled at him. Her blue eyes gazing into his brown puddles of chocolate. His smile genuine as he chuckled at her. She was all the time giving him silly nicknames. However, this was one she knew he didn’t care for. She only called him that when they were alone and after he showed his anger. “I love you too tiger mama” he smiled at her and kissed her nose. That was her nickname.

“Thanks for coming to my rescue and being the hero of my nightmares,” she laid her head against his chest. He had a navy tuxedo Jacket on, light blue shirt and a royal blue bow tie. It was his signature color but he was only wearing it because he knew what it would do to his tiger mama laying in his arms. “Don’t think I didn’t recognize what you did either” she giggled tugging at his Jacket. He chuckled an evil laugh in her ear. “I have no idea what ever you are talking about” he feigned ever so innocently and kissed her head and brushed his fingers gently over her head. He smiled to himself yes this was the best decision he ever made.

**Chapter One – Decisions, Decisions**

_About five years ago_

 

He was forced with a horrible reality. He and his ‘children of time,’ the name rang in his ears over and over after Davos first called them that, literally saved the world. How could this be anything but a time to celebrate? He saved the world and got the girl. Isn’t that what movies are made of everyday? Not for the man in the brown with blue pinstripe suit. He was at the controller. He looked around, to his right was a beautiful blonde with a blue leather Jacket that literally crossed universes just to return to him. In his heart, he knew he didn’t deserve that kind of love after everything he has done. It was shown him that night. To the left was a feisty and spunky red head that two hours ago couldn’t change the fuse but now knew everything about space and time and it was his fault. The guilt reigned on him like a summer shower. What he had turned these people, his companions he always called them into. They were ordinary humans yet brilliant in every way that mattered. After travelling with him in some form or fashion they now were turned into soldiers. He abhorred violence. He even mentioned he’d rather be a coward over a killer any day yet here he had several friends willing to quite literally destroy the earth and everything on it to stop what would be the unending suffering of the human race. To the red head’s left was something that should have never happened. The reason for Donna, the feisty red head, knowing what she knows. His quite literal twin, clone, vanity personified. He was the one in the blue suit. He had come about because while the designated driver, Dr. Brown, was talking to Donna trying to figure out what was going on in the parallel world she was in with Rose, his favorite blond, she spoke a few words to him about the stars going out. Then Donna looked over his shoulder and told him to ask her himself. _What_? He was thinking as he looked at Donna like she sprouted carrots out of her red head. He saw then that she was looking past his shoulder. He turned around and when his eyes focused he swears his two hearts stopped and probably a third one too if he would have had one. There was her smile. A smile he missed for what seems like a millennium but was about four years. After catching his breath, considering he had a superior time lord physiology and has dual pulmonary function made it harder for him to asphyxiate, he started running towards her. She was running towards him. The only thing missing was the love theme to _Romeo and Juliet_. The world around both were quite literally falling apart yet they had found each other again. However just like in a movie the bane of their existence a robot that looked like a pepper shaker with a plunger and an egg beater for weapons rolled out and shouted it traditional shrilling phrase “EXTERMINATE!” As he turned and was brought into the real world a bolt of electricity shot through him. He had been shot. After all these years, the love of a girl would be how his mortal enemies finally did him in. He fell to the ground trying to breathe. He tried hard as Rose finally reached him to not lose consciences. He looked up and saw his pink and yellow human. He remembered when they were on new, new earth. It was their first trip, or as Rose called it their first date, after he regenerated from leather and grouchiness to what Rose affectionally called him the nutty professor geek chic. She made an observation that the nuns were cats. He told her not to stare and imagine how she looked to them all pink and yellow. Since then that was his little nickname for her, his pink and yellow girl. She was cradling his head in her hands. He smiled at her but his pain is horrible. _Please not now! I don’t want to now!_ _I just got her back!_ He thought to himself trying to stave off his regeneration. _What would she think about my new regeneration? Would she want to stay? Would she leave? Would I have two heads? Would I finally be ginger?_ He felt Rose and Donna dragging and carrying him back to his ship. He remembered Christmas when Rose had to carrying him to the TARDIS from her home because of the regeneration. “Oh no I came all this way” he heard Rose say. He was afraid she’d leave then. _My hand! My hand! I can…oh it hurts to think_. He heard Jack yell at Rose to get back. The flames started. He knows how she was after his ninth incarnation regenerated. She was scared confused. It took him a while to convince her he was himself. The world literally didn’t have time to go through that again. He liked this version of himself but more importantly Rose liked this version of himself.  He remembered when Cassandra possessed him. He hid away his thoughts but knew what Cassandra was saying because she was in Rose’s head. Rose thought him a bit foxy and she liked this version of him. He remembered going up to Rose, and teasing her about her thoughts. Rose was trying to look away and not laughing. That was one of his favorite memories. Not that he liked being possessed by Cassandra but the look on Rose’s face got him through many a night since they were separated.

As the flames shot through him he could feel his body healing itself. He didn’t need to change then and reached around and poured the excessive energy into his hand the Sycorax leader chopped off in that Christmas day sword fight so many years ago. He was so thankful that Jack had found that hand and returned it to him. After he did that he didn’t need to do a full on regeneration. He could remain his ‘foxy’ self for Rose. He caught his breath and got his balance. “now then, where were we?” Jack, Donna, and Rose stood there looking at him like they were stunned. Then he felt more of regeneration energy and blew it into the hand bubbling in the jar. They still looked shocked and confused. He’d have to break this down for them in a way they would understand, being human and all. “You see! Used the regeneration energy to heal myself, but soon as that was done I didn't need to change, I didn't want to, why would I? Look at me. So, to stop the energy going all the way I siphoned off the rest into a handy bio matching receptacle. Namely, my hand. That hand there. My handy spare hand. Remember, Christmas Day, Sycorax? Lost my hand in a sword fight. That's my hand. What do you think?” he could see the sad look on her face. She walked up to him cautiously. _Come on Rose it’s still me._ He thought to himself.

“And you're still you?”  
“I'm still me.” Rose smiled and hugged him tightly. _Oh my pink and yellow girl I have missed you_. He held on to her tightly grinning from ear to ear. He smelled her perfume and he shampoo. He sure did miss this. He vowed to himself to not let this end again. He remembered that day when he was a hologram on Bad Wolf Bay. She told him she loved him. He knew it. He always knew it. He wanted to tell her and even went so far as to start but he faded away before he could tell her leaving both in tears. He always knew that she knew how he felt about her. The moments they shared on their adventures. The bond they had the closeness. Twice he wanted to tell her but could never manage to get the words out. He was determined after this crisis was averted he’d finally tell her how he really feels. It was hard for him to accept because she was human. Their life spans are about the length of a blink of an eye compared to a time lord. However, she was his pink and yellow girl. They would make the most of the limited lifespan they had together.         

     After a few moments, he released her only to find out the power was going out in the TARDIS. Before they knew it, they were taken to the Dalek crucible. They were facing off against his mortal enemies the Daleks. Once they learned where they were at the Doctor, Rose, Captain Jack Harkness (one of the Doctor’s and Rose’s dearest friends) all exited the TARDIS. Donna was going to go out but the door closed before she could exit the TARDIS. They couldn’t get the door open and Donna couldn’t get out. Davros, the evil leader of the Daleks, took immense pride in tormenting the Doctor by making the TARDIS fall to its death. He was mortified. Not only because it was his friend, his one constant companion when everyone else left, it was his home where he lived for the past 900 years. That was hard enough however his other friend, the saucy ginger he grown to love as a sister he never had was in there as well. She fell to her death. It was another one to add to the list of the Doctor’s failures. Davros also took great enjoyment at, if a Dalek can have enjoyment, at showing the Doctor all his friends that came to his aid. He caused a flashback of all the people who have died. Jabe, the Controller, Lynda, Sir Robert, Mrs. Moore, Mr. Skinner, Ursula, Bridget, the Face of Boe, Chantho, Astrid Peth, Luke Rattigan, Jenny, River Song and the Hostess. He was shaken at what his lifestyle has caused the ones that he loves. “The man who abhors violence, never carrying a gun, but this is the truth, Doctor. You take ordinary people and you fashion them into weapons. Behold your children of time, transformed into murderers. I made the Daleks, Doctor. You made this.” Davros reminded him. The only comfort to come to him was when Rose came up and held his hand. That was something special between the two of them. It started out as a way to make sure she was safe back in that shop so many years ago and it just morphed into a feeling of comfort between the two of them. Now it was helping to curtail his anger, The Oncoming Storm.  

      However just like in a movie, and why he was thinking about movies a lot recently he didn’t know, when the chips are down there’s always a way out. Their way out came in the strangest, shocking and most perfect way. The famous whoosh and whine of hope came ringing through. He looked at Rose and she at him. “But that’s not possible.” Everyone was at a loss when they saw the famous royal blue retro police call box materialize in front of them. Outside stepped a man in a blue suit with spikey brown hair, converse tennis shoes, and brown eyes. He was carrying a weapon and very much had the look of anger. The Doctor in the brown suit is in shock and disbelief. Dr. Blue suit came running toward Davros. “Don’t!” he yelled but Davros moved back and zapped him dropping him to the ground. He was put into a holding cell. As if this couldn’t get any crazier, and with the Doctor there was always crazy, Donna Noble runs out yelling “Doctor” and picked up the weapon yet she realizes she doesn’t know what to do. Davros shoots her as well knocking her to the ground. Now all their hope is gone. Rose asked the Doctor why there are two of them. Dr. Blue explained it’s a human biological metacrisis. Now the Doctor knows there’s no way of stopping the reality bomb. He is truly at a loss for how to save the world. Davros makes him and his friends stand to watch the destruction of the world. Time is running out and he has no way of stopping him. As the supreme Dalek counts down the rels to destruction once it hit zero there was a power outage. Everyone looked around confused only to find of all the people the fastest temp in Chiswick has just been activated. In the TARDIS, the biological metacrisis was a two-way street. Dr. Blue formed because Donna touched the hand the energy was put in. She now was part human part time lord. While everyone else was counting down Donna snuck behind the control panel and flipped switches until the reality bomb was destroyed. Just for a bonus she made the daleks spin around like little toys kids played with. The holding cells were deactivated. “Well, don't just stand there you skinny boys in suits. Get to work!” Dr. Brown and Dr. Blue ran over and helped her while the rest of the prisoners took care of getting rid of the Daleks out of the way. The ‘children of time’ as Davros called them were back in control. Donna explained to Rose, Sarah Jane, Captain Jack why there are now three Doctors.

            Dr. Blue, Dr. Brown and Dr. Donna returned all the planets back to their original location except for the earth. They would have to use the TARDIS to complete that mission. Dr. Brown ran into the TARDIS ready to return the earth. Davros told them not to listen to Dalek Caan about making the prophecy come true of the end of everything Dalek. Dalek Caan told Dr. Blue he must make it happen. “He’s right” Donna believed he should wait for the original Doctor. “I am the Doctor” he reminded her. His human side apparently overriding this merciful time lord side realizing there are enough daleks to destroy the cosmos and we all know the daleks are like the proverbial cat thought they were goners but they always come back.

            After the celebrations of saving the earth the Doctors and crew flew the earth back into orbit and land in a park. Dr. Brown escorted Sarah Jane out. She told him how even though he was lonely he had the biggest family in the world. Next to leave were Jack and Martha. The Doctor said his goodbyes and to them and his surprise Mickey decided to stay. There was nothing left for him in the world he was living in especially not Rose. Mickey decided to stay in his original universe. He fist bumped Doctor Brown and ran towards Jack and Martha. He sure came a long way from being Mickey The Idiot. The Doctor took a deep breath. What he had hoped would be a good day has turned out to be a big personal nightmare again. The farther away they got the bigger the dread of his new reality came and what he was forced to do. Because of his metacrisis’, he wasn’t comfortable calling him brother or anything else, act of genocide his personal happiness has to be sacrificed. His metacrisis was too dangerous to be left alone in the world. He needed someone to tame him down. He needed someone like Rose. The Doctor trusted Rose. She helped him deal with what happened to him during the time war. She helped him ease the pain. She helped him to be a better person and to understand better humans. How many times has she stopped him from doing something he’d regret? Now she would have to do it again with the metacrisis. Now he must return Jackie, Rose and his clone back to Pete’s world. Rose would have her happy ending. She would get what she wanted her own Doctor only he’d grow old with her. They’d have the one adventure he could never have. Once again, the opportunity to tell his pink and yellow human how he feels about her has slipped through his fingers. He couldn’t tell her now. It would only make things more difficult. The curse of the time lord strikes again swallow his hearts and pride once again. “Ok Doctor” he sighed, “let’s do this.” He put on a brave face and walked into the TARDIS. He took a piece of the TARDIS and put it in his pocket. “Just time for one last trip. Dårlig Ulv Stranden.” He glanced over at the metacrisis, “Better known as Bad Wolf Bay.” Dr. Blue looked at him quizzically. He knew this couldn’t be good news by the way the look on his other self’s face. He had the same memories, feelings, everything as Dr. Brown he could even do the telepathy. _You’re just going to drop Jackie off, aren’t you?_

_You know what I must do._

_Are you dropping HER off?_

_Yes, and for her to be happy you must stay_

_What?_

_You know why! Just go along with the plan._

_Don’t I get a say_

_You lost that opportunity when you committed genocide!_

_So, you would have the Daleks blow up the rest of the universe?_

Dr. Brown shut off the communication with his brother. He didn’t need to be reminded how after everyone was dropped off he was going to be solely alone. He didn’t need to be reminded that the woman he loved and had been so afraid to tell so many times never get to have a life with her. He’d never get to share in the joys of her life and shelter her from the pain that would be Doctor 2.0s’s job. That he’d never truly, much like he took over for his ninth incarnation, someone would be taking over his spot. He had to put on a brave face. Rose would see right through it if he didn’t. He didn’t want her to worry about him. He wanted her to be happy. He looked over at him. He was a mixture of angry and grateful. If he didn’t come around they wouldn’t have been able to save the world however because he killed all the daleks he committed genocide and forced his hand. _Who am I kidding? Rose would have to stay with her mom. She has a new life and a new sibling. Once the reality she’d never see them again actually hit then she’d stay. You seriously are a plum if you think she’d stay with you. Maybe he is a blessing after all. He’d protect her. He’d make sure she was safe. He’d never have to worry about her. With the piece of the TARDIS they can grow their own TARDIS. The Doctor, Rose Tyler and the TARDIS the way_ _it should be the stuff of legend. Yeah, I must do this I can’t… I won’t let her wind up like the rest of the companions that died because of me. Rose is too special. She will not wind up a victim. That is it decision is made_

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	2. Chapter 2 – Lead The Way Earth Girl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dr. Brown and Dr. Blue have to deal with their actions.

July 7, 2017

 

Chapter 2 – Lead The Way Earth Girl

                 Before he knew it and way too fast for his taste the Tardis was materialized on that bloody blasted beach. The Doctor took a deep breath and closed his eyes. _This is it. Please don’t screw this up for either one of us._ He sent his brother a message. _Believe me I know my role. Are you sure you want to do this? We can always work something out._

_No this is the best situation_

_Alright it’s your loss_

_Don’t remind me_

_I still think…_

Don’t! that’s what got us into this bloody trouble to begin with! Jackie was the first to exit the Tardis. In typical Jackie fashion, she complained because they were back in Norway. Dr. Blue exited next followed by Rose, Donna and then Dr. Brown. This was the moment he dreaded. This was the moment he had to give up his Rose once again for good. There is no way he can fathom ever finding a way back to her and truthfully if he did how could he do that to him, Rose and his brother. He was finally able to call him that since metacrisis sounded so ominous. By leaving her with him she could fulfill her promise to be with him forever. He watched her looking around. “This is the parallel world.”

“I brought you home.”

“I spent all that time trying to find you I’m not going back now”

_My sweet Rose. My sweet pink and yellow Rose._ “But you’ve got to because we saved the universe but at a cost and the cost is him. He destroyed the daleks. He committed genocide. He’s too dangerous to be left on his own.” He looked at his brother.

“But you made me!” He was pissed at the indignation but also knew that they needed to make Rose understand the gravity of the situation. “Exactly you were born in battle full of blood and anger and revenge” he said angry then looked at Rose softly “that’s me when we first met and you made me better now you can do the same for him.”

“But he’s not you”

“He needs you that’s very me.” _Please Rose this is hard enough._ Finally realizing he needs help explaining the situation and convincing Rose Donna encouraged Dr. Blue to tell her what’s going on. Even though he knew it was for the best he still didn’t want to give up travelling even though his original version told him he’d get a piece of the Tardis and somehow Donna figured out a way to grow a Tardis at a quicker way. He played his part. He explained that he only has one heart meaning he’ll grow old and age at the same rate as her. Rose bought it she brought both together and asked them both what they were going to tell her last time she was there _. Please tell her the truth because I can’t._ _She’ll never stay if she hears it from me._ When it was his turn Dr. Blue leaned in and whispered in her ear. Dr. Brown watched as both of his hearts break. He slowly stepped backward toward the Tardis. He knows Rose has finally heard the phrase she has been dying to hear. The Doctor knew what was going to happen next. He didn’t need to witness it. He closed his eyes and walked toward the Tardis. He was trying to keep up the brave face until he reached the Tardis and his room then he could let everything out. He rubbed the back of his neck trying to keep from breaking down. “I’m sorry you had to do that.” Donna whispered lovingly. He just nodded his head. He needed to get to the Tardis before he lost control. “You had your say now I’m going to have mine.” He heard Rose say and put her hand on his shoulder. The Doctor stood there stiff. _You were supposed to convince her!_

_I told her the truth._ “Rose” he held his breath “you…”

“No, you have sent me off more time than I can count it is my decision. I made the decision a long time ago to stay with you and that’s what I’m doing”

“Rose you are with me! he’s me!” he pleased with her.

“He’s not you Doctor” she said flatly.

“Rose I told you same memories same feelings same everything.”

“I’m sorry…I’m choosing you” she kissed Dr. Brown the way the Doctor fully expected her to kiss his brother. At first the Doctor didn’t respond but just like Rose the more she pushed he gave in. all the time fighting it pushing it away the pain of today just took its toll and he allowed himself to be taken in again by his feisty, brilliant, fantastic, pink and yellow girl. The hum of the Tardis broke them up. “The wall is closing.” Donna told them.

“The only way I’d stay is if you looked me dead in the eyes and told me you didn’t want me anymore” she looked into his brown eyes. “Can you stand there and honestly tell me you don’t want me to come with you.” He looked at her. His mouth was dry. He opened his mouth but the words wouldn’t come out. He knew she needed to stay but he couldn’t do that. Not after what she did. He was strong but when he looked into her eyes it was like she was piercing his soul. “I … I … I can’t” he said softly. Then swallowed hard and looked down.

“Well then” she smiled at him “We better get back to the Tardis then” she smiled at him.

“But what about your mom and Tony your life here.” Dr. Blue tried to remind her still unsure what was going to happen to him now.  “They know how hard I worked to get back here” she looked at Dr. Brown. “They had lives I just went through the motions.”

“We better go” Donna motioned for the two of them. “Last chance Rose” Dr. Brown whispered. Rose looked back at her mom. As usual Jackie was being selfish and begging her not to go. She was being a mother knowing she’d never see her daughter again. “You have your happiness mom, let me have mine.” She hugged her mom goodbye and went into the Tardis. Donna looked at Dr. Blue. He was now the heartbroken one. Rose chose him. The new Doctor could offer her his one single heart and literally change his lifestyle for her, but she had to pick the one when push came to shove still couldn’t or wouldn’t tell her what she wanted to hear. Yet he told her. now here he was basically at the mercy of his original self. Was he going to punish him as he always does? Was he going to leave him in this world at the mercy of the Tyler’s was he going to put him on another planet hell was he going to kill him at this point that’s what Dr. Blue wanted to do to his brother.  He watched Donna walk up to the Tardis with all his disgusting as he called it new human emotions. He stood there she turned around “well don’t just stand there spaceman! We have to go!” Dr. Blue grinned at her “lead the way earth girl” and followed her up to the ramp awaiting his destiny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so this is my first who ff. hope you enjoy. i'll try to have another chappie up later. i've already got 4 wrote just need to type up. hope you enjoy


	3. Thanks For Everything Earthgirl

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> metacrisis has to deal with his identity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to those leaving kudos ;)

July 7, 2017

Chapter 3 – Thanks For Everything Earthgirl

 

                 The door behind Dr. Blue shut as he looked at his brother taking charge with Rose on one side and Donna on the other. He didn’t want to let on like anything was bothering him. They were deciding where to go next. He was just a mere case of the elephant in the room. He minded his part until they got into the vortex. Then he quietly walked away to the library. He sat there quietly in the dark his mind racing and yet at the same time completely empty. He wanted to be alone no one to disturb him. In a way, he felt like he was awaiting his sentence. At this point however he lost Rose so what else can go wrong? What was he going to do now? His brother wouldn’t want him around. He could help but would he really want to see him and Rose be together? Could he handle it and not interfere? Would Rose realize she made a mistake and want to choose him? If she did would he even be open to it? He blew out his cheeks and sat there in the dark in the solitude. He had a lot of things to learn about being human. He travelled with them all the time but he was never one. This was going to be a new experience for him. He was actually kind of scared at what his future held. He didn’t like feeling like he was at the mercy of someone. He didn’t like to feel like he was an elephant in the room. He was just as equal as his brother. He wanted to be treated as such. He wanted to be treated like he mattered. He could contribute on an unique scale; would he get the chance? _Man, I sound whiny_ he chuckled at his thoughts.

                 While he sat there in solitude the Tardis shined a light on a huge stack of books. He remembered reading these and being enamored with one of the authors. She was a neurosurgeon but her study of astrophysics was what really interested him. He remembered laughing thinking she might be a time lord she was so smart. Smarter than most humans he knew of at least. Dr. Blue shook his head. _I’m not in the mood ole girl_. He knew the Tardis was encouraging him to read the books again. Some were medical journals, some were just a collection of theories. They ranged from assorted topics, astrophysics, molecular biology, advanced genetics, neuroscience even a theory on time travel. It was a collection of books that not everyone would be interested in unless they were in the field however the doctor and his brother were always interested in humans and their relative theories. He sighed the brown leather couch in the library was comfortable and he sunk into it. There was a gold lamp with a green shade on the solid wood table next to him. It was old fashioned. There was a blanket draped across the couch and a white shag rug under his feet. The walls were solid cherry book shelves. The books were arranged by title much like a human library. They were sectioned off into biographies, fiction and of course their favorite sci-fi. There was a ceiling fan quietly spinning in the room. There were dark green drapes adoring the walls even though there was no actual window in there.  There was a bottle of bourbon on a table. He wasn’t a big drinker but he poured an ounce and swirled it around in the glass. He watched it swirl around in the glass and breathed in the scent of caramel and vanilla. He read the bottle of Maker’s Mark. _Distilled in Loretto, ky. I’ve been to the u.s. before but never Kentucky. Maybe I’ll make a trip there and check it out._ A knock at the door disturbed his solitude. “We need to talk” a feminine voice spoke to him. He closed his eyes and drank the bourbon. He set the glass down on the glass table in front of him and made a loud clank letting her know she disturbed his solitude. “I think you said everything you needed to say” he said coldly. He was quiet for a while. She didn’t leave. “alright then since you’re not going to leave let’s talk.” He sighed and shifted to look at her. “You want _HIM_. The one that will never tell you how he feels because he’s too big of a damn coward. Look at what he did to you Rose! He left you! Twice! Yet you come back to him because a carbon copy isn’t good enough.”  He wanted to go on but the words for once in his life just wouldn’t come. “Doctor…” she started.

“You could have had everything Rose Tyler. Your family, your friends, someone that would be willing to give up the only life he’s ever known to stay WITH YOU but no that’s not good enough. You had to have him! You just had to go and give it all up and for what? Really what are you going to get out of it but a broken heart.”  

“Did you ever think you bloody idiot I did it for you too? Would you really be happy settling down with a mortgage and a house missing out on traveling the stars?”

“If it meant I could spend it with you yes!”  He growled. “Now who knows what that big hypocrite will do with me. He surely doesn’t want me around. ”

“That’s not true”

“Yes, it is. I am him remember Rose! He doesn’t want me around. I’m a bloody reminder of everything he’s ever done. I’m a walking mirror a reminder of every decision he’s ever made. I’m a reminder of his vanity, his anger, his ego. I’m a walking talking version of his ego and you think he wants me around? ”

“I think he needs you around now” she said softly.

“Why?”

“Donna’s…”  suddenly it hit the Doctor what was going on. “There’s never been one like me and there’s no way a human can live with time lord knowledge. It would fry her brain”

“That’s what he said. He’s pretty tore up right now. She seems to be having a reaction now.”   Dr. Blue messaged his brother _. I’m alright. I’m always alright_ was the canned response he got back. He’s lost count of how many times he’s used that same phrase. Dr. Blue walked past Rose to the control panel and watched as Donna was begging The Doctor to let her stay. “Please don't make me go back! Doctor! Please! Please don't make me go back!”

“Donna. Oh, Donna Noble. I am so sorry.”

“Please, no! No! No!”

The look on his face was one of horrendous grief. He is literally losing his best friend. A sister he never had and it’s all his fault. He wasn’t going to let him go through this alone. He walked up behind her and put a tender hand on her shoulder. “But we had the best of times.”

“it’s ok Donna you will be fantastic. You were brilliant” Dr. Blue kissed her temple and closed his eyes. As much in the same way leather Doctor took the vortex energy from Rose with a kiss he was helping his fellow time lord in the painful loss of their friend. She could never remember him, them, anyone because if she did her brain would fry. He shed a few tears because he remembered when he first came to be he knew her thoughts. He knew she didn’t think highly of herself. Everything she did was a self-defense mechanism. He also knew how it terrified her that she knew that. It was her inner most secret and he knew. He tried to tell her she was brilliant and lift her spirits but now she’d never have the chance to know just how awesome, brilliant and important she really was. As she collapsed in his arms he held on to the woman he would consider to be his best friend and sister. She was the reason he was here to begin with. If she hadn’t touched his brother’s hand he wouldn’t be here now. He lost Rose but the biggest loser of them all was Donna. Much like Rose taught him to forgive himself and love Donna Noble fastest temp in Chiswick taught him to be human. “Thank you for everything earth girl” he held her in his arms till they landed out in front of her house. “The least I can do is deliver the bad news” Dr. Blue told his brother. “I can do it. She was my responsibility.”

“I can help”

“no, I … I need to be alone.”

“I understand” Dr. Blue watched his heart broken brother deliver their friend back home. “thanks for everything Earthgirl” he kissed her cheek as Dr. Brown exited the Tardis holding the firey red head savior of the world.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4 – Ole Girl”s Got Ideas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the trio has to deal with the fall out and the tardis starts meddling

Chapter 4 – Ole Girl”s Got Ideas

     Dr. Blue sat on the jump seat waiting for his counterpart to return. It had started pouring down the rain he finally walked back in drenched. He didn”t make eye contact. He didn”t have to. The look on his face spoke volumes. He looked like he lost his best friend. He threw his coat over the coral. He walked slowly flicking switches. He put them in the vortex he was trying to be strong and not show how hurt he was. They sat there in complete silence for two people whose mouths never stopped running the silence spoke a thousand words.

They sat there for a very long time until Rose came to the console. Dr. Blue got up to leave. He wasn’t in the mood to deal with this now. “Don’t leave” Dr. Brown told him. “We have to talk.”  
“We don’t have”  
“Yes, we do. We need to clear the air between the three of us. I’m not going to walk around tip toeing on my Tardis.”  
“alright then let’s get it out. What are you going to do with me?”  
“what do you mean do with you?”  
“you were so quick to dump me off like a bad problem in Pete’s world. Your plan didn’t plan out so what now?”  
“yeah whose fault is that?” he glared at him.  
“oh, it’s my fault? I did the one thing in all of the years you’ve never had the guts to do and that’s tell her I love her and it’s my problem?”  
“you of all people should know!”  
“oi! I’m right here!” Rose was getting mad.   
“you had everything you wanted why couldn’t…”  
“What Doctor? Be a good girl and do as I’m told? You know I don’t work that way. You need me. I promised you forever and I keep my promises you have NO IDEA what I had to do to get back here! You may have given up on me but I NEVER gave up on you!”  
“I never gave up on you!” he snarled at her. “I wanted…looked for ways to get you all the time. Don’t ever think I gave up on you Rose Tyler!” he snapped at her.  
“Then how come the first chance the very first chance you get you try to dump me off with your clone?”  
“Because he can give you everything I can’t! I thought you knew that!”  
“What Doctor? What can’t you give me? your heart? Are you so scared to actually feel love?”  
“Rose” Dr. Blue tried to stop her.  
“This is between me and him!” she snarled. Dr. Blue sat back on the couch in silence. Being every part of Dr. Brown, he knew what was going on with him but now that he was human he understood Rose at least a little as much as any man regardless of species can understand women. “you don’t understand Rose” Dr. Brown said softly.  
“then explain it to me!” she pleaded. He ran his fingers through his hair. He remained quiet as he stood over the console flipping switches. Dr. Blue knew he didn’t want to talk. He was trying to remain calm. He wished Rose would take the hint and let things go. This had been a very trying day. Dr. Blue knew that his other self just needed a while to process everything that happened. He needed to come to terms with things. This day started with him and Donna now he has his Rose back, Donna’s gone, he has a mirror image of himself and even though he hasn’t said anything what Davros did to him really hit to his soul. His reminder of what happened to his companions was also a wakeup call and partly why he’s wanting to keep Rose with the new Doctor. He felt like that might make some small penance for all the pain he’s caused. However, that was taken away from him. Rose and the new doctor watched as the time lord turned away and walked back to his room and locked the door. Dr. Blue closed his eyes and Rose had her mouth opened. The doctor never locked his door.

Rose sat down next to Doctor Blue. He didn’t say anything to her she hurt him already. He wasn’t ready to welcome her to hurt him again. Before he said anything or she had a chance to say anything Dr. Blue got up to leave. “please don’t.” she asked quietly and put her hand on his arm. He looked down at it. He was half tempted to leave and half tempted to stay. He was hurt beyond words about her rejection, Donna, his brother, so many things. “please” she pleaded. He remembered how she looked when she caused the paradox around her father how distraught she was. He hurt her feelings but then had to apologize. He sat back down his heart full on guard. He loved Rose dearly but he didn’t know if he could take her rejection. He may be the exact clone even more than a twin of the man she loved but he was still a man and was not going to be sloppy seconds for her or anything. “I owe you an apology” she said softly. “I said a lot of mean things to you out of hurt. Its …. None of this is your fault and I just wanted to apologize to you.” She looked up at him. Just like that all the hurt she caused him went away. “Rose Tyler” he smiled just like he did that day with her dad and he had to apologize for snapping at her. “I forgive you.” He reached over and hugged her. “I could never stay mad at you” he whispered. He swallowed his heart and his pride. He maybe a lot of things but he knows how much his brother loves Rose. He knows how he hurt every day since they were parted. The time he spent trying hard to find a way to Pete’s world. The tears he fought back as he tried to stay brave for everyone and not let them see his pain or how he was spiraling out of control on the inside. How his precious pink and yellow girl always kept him inline kept him sane kept him from crossing the edge. “as far as him, just give him some time to process everything that has happened. Davros really got to him. Then donna, me everything. You know us we’re always all right even when we’re not”  
“I know that’s time lord speak for falling apart on the inside.”   
“exactly” he smiled. Before she could hurt him and before he plead his brothers case anymore he got up and went to another room the Tardis made up for him. She’s not going to get the answers from me. she wants him she’s going to have to deal with what comes from it. I’m not going to be a buffer between the two of them no matter how much it hurts. He changed into some plaid blue pajama pants and a tee-shirt that said trust me I’m a doctor. The room the Tardis made up for him was indeed a cerulean blue with a four-poster bed. Ole girl must know I like blue now a soft hum and flash of light signaled he was thinking correctly. The bed linens were done in white with little blue lily flowers all of them. Really ole girl? You set this up for me? Not very masculine and really the flowers? The Tardis gave a stern hum letting him know she didn’t approve of his disapproval. Knowing you ole girl you have something up your round things the Tardis hummed and if it could giggle would giggle. Dr. Blue chuckled at the childlike feeling he got from the ole ship. He knew she was up to something. I’ll go along for the ride then ole girl. You never led me astray…. well you’ve led me astray but to where I’m supposed to be. He laid down on the bed. Not surprisingly there was a blue lamp next to him. Good thing I didn’t pick a bright orange and yellow suit he chuckled. There was that same stack of books on the desk next to him. He knew he didn’t put them there. He hasn’t even been in that room before. Are you dropping hints ole girl? He got the hum of approval. Well not tonight ole girl I’m tired and it’s been a long day. 

 

Dr. Blue’s first night as human was eye opening. He laid there his mind racing over everything. He tossed to the right and laid there. He closed his eyes. Usually the Tardis would help him sleep. Twenty-two minutes later he turned to the left another fifteen minutes and he laid on his back. He was dead tired but when he closed his eyes sleep would evade. “fine! You win!” he groaned. He picked up a book. What is it that you want to get across? All in good time my thief he heard the Tardis in his head. “alright let’s look at the first one by a Doctor Tom Ackles” it was about the effects of time travel and how it’s not theoretically available. Really? Let’s try next. The second one was on the calming effects of Beethoven on infants with colic. Like I’ll ever have an infant but whatever let’s see what it says. Thirty-two minutes, seven second and twelve yawns later Dr. Blue fell asleep with the book on his chest. The next article was by one of his favorite authors. He remembered reading it and making notes in the margins about how he’d like to meet this doctor, possibly even see if she’d want to be a companion since she seemed as close to the doctor in intelligence as any human could be. He remembered writing notes to look up more information on her however Donna interrupted his process with some silly thing she came up with. Doctor Blue would have to wait till he woke up to further look up information on Dr. Lilliana Patrick, Lilly as her friends called her.


	5. Chapter 5 – A New Kid In Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the doctors have a heart to hearts, jack meets the girl he believes will be the doctor's dream girl. and dr blue learns something ordinary humans have to endure everyday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the song she's referring to is motley crue's doctor feelgood

     When Dr. Blue woke up he laid in bed instead of immediately jumping up and running to the shower like he used to. He ran his fingers through his messy brown hair and took a deep breath. He didn’t want to face his brother or Rose just yet. He was sure neither one of them wanted to see him either. He rolled over on to his side and suddenly experienced something most humans find annoying, an ear worm.

                 Now The Doctor was friends with Beethoven and attempted to take Rose on a couple of music jaunts one of them being Ed Sullivan to see Elvis but the Tardis had other plans. However, this song he hadn’t heard before. It was kind of catchy in a way very pop, country, rock and even Motown sort of way. After a while it was getting on his nerves and he asked the Tardis to take it away. No such luck. She just added a couple more songs on so that at a special point where it kind of makes sense the next song rolls on and picks up and then a third one would be added to it. The Doctor had his own jukebox going on in his head on a loop of three songs.

                 After twenty minutes thinking of anything to get his mind off of it he gave up and took a shower. Once he was done he went to the galley and ate a banana. “Did you sleep well?” he heard a voice behind him causing him to jump. He wasn’t ready for this just yet. He wanted to eat his banana in peace and wake up. He turned around and his brother was also eating a banana. “uh yeah I ... I guess.”

“I remember when I went under the chameleon arch that was one of the hardest parts about being human getting or staying asleep.”

“yeah” he chuckled “I remember. After about an hour I gave up and started reading some of those books we read from those various authors.”

“oh yeah I remember. I was going to look up one of the doctors because she was so intelligent to see if she might want to go for a trip ya know to pick her brain. I kind of suspect she’s a time lord in a human body she’s so smart.”

“nah she’s not” he tapped his head “we’d know it remember. I finally fell asleep before got to her.” There was silence. “so…” Dr. Blue started he might as well cut the small talk with himself and get it over with. “have you decided?”

“decided what?” _are you kidding me? my future you idiot._

“about me” he said chewing on another banana.

“yes…” he sighed. _Oh, here it goes_ Dr. Blue thought to himself. “I need your help.” Dr. Blue almost choked on his banana Dr. Brown wasn’t doing much better. “my help?” he asked surprised. “I..I..I don’t know what to do about Rose.” He admitted. Dr. Blue couldn’t help but almost smile while he took another bite of his favorite yellow fruit. “just tell her. That’s all she wants is you to tell her the truth.”

“I did!”

“no… I DID! She doesn’t want to hear it from me. she wants to hear it from you. I’m just the carbon copy the 2.0. she wants to hear it from you. Now up until I came about I was you I know you love her. I know it broke both of your hearts to try and put her with me. honestly, I think that’s why she stayed. She knew it was hurting you. Even having Donna, she knew it wasn’t the same. She loves you brother. She gave up everything just to come back to you. Don’t let it be in vain because if you don’t tell her then we’ll both lose her and do you want that really?”

“but…but…”

“I know you can’t stand back and watch someone you truly love grow old and die while you never will.  Truthfully though would you rather have 20, 30, 40 years with her than knowing someone else would take your place even if it is me? what if it wasn’t me? would you really want someone like Jack having his paws all over her? Or would you want someone like that stupid Adam kid she picked up? Or Mickey? Or that Jimmy Stone guy? Would you really want her to be with someone that will treat her like dirt and maybe hit her or abuse her again just because you can’t stand the thought of one day waking up and she’ll have grey hair and labored breathing or one day you’ll wake up and shell be gone. Either way brother you’ll lose her. I have to live with the fact she doesn’t want me. I have to find my own Rose now. You still have the chance. You don’t want to miss the look in her eyes when you finally tell her you love her. With you she’ll know it’s right and not some convoluted plan and truthfully brother she deserves that.”

“what about you?” his brother asked softly. “how are you going to feel?”

“I have to accept it. Its… its… it’s not going to be easy but I love Rose and I want her to be happy. You make her happy why I don’t know” he chuckled.

“what did she ever see in us?”

“secretly I think she likes the leather us better” dr. blue chuckled. “I think it was the damaged goods that attracted her to us and now… we’re just to foxy to resist” he chuckled at his brother. They both knew what he was referring too. “so, what about you are you going to go find some new girl?”

“who knows she’d even want me” Dr. Blue said softly.

“alright donna” his brother smirked at him. “you are still a time lord and time lords don’t get insecure.”

“says the brother of insecurities” he chuckled then threw the banana peel at him. “besides it might be fun having the both of us around. Imagine the pranks we can pull on people” they both chuckled. “like we did when we were kids at the academy” Dr. Brown remembered.

“only now there’s two of us and I remember when we traveled somewhere in America in the 70s a commercial for gum double the trouble double the fun.”

“besides someone needs to keep your scrawny arse in line”

“have you looked in the mirror brother? He chuckled at dr. blue.

“I just had a thought. My physiology has changed. I might get fat! So, I might not be the foxy one anymore” he waggled his eyebrows.

“is that what I look like doing that?”

“yep” Dr. Blue popped the p. “and it DRIVES HER CRAZY! Go on I know you remember Cassandra!” they both started chuckling. “the look on her face was worth getting possessed for.” They laughed at their favorite memory of Rose. “oh brother…I admit I thin k it will be nice to have you around.” Dr. Brown finally admitted.

“especially since I know what you’re thinking. I can help save your ass when trouble comes around.”

“or cause us to get into more trouble”

“no, I think you’re thinking of our jeopardy friendly pink and yellow girl getting us into trouble.”

“yeah wellll our big mouth doesn’t hurt either. Just…” Dr. Brown looked down and played with the banana peel. He didn’t want to admit he was starting to like having his brother around. “you just…you…you just be careful. You only have one heart.”

“aww you do love me” he joked. “I know…and it feels weird. No more samba” he waited till his brother took a drink of tea before saying that last bit. He laughed as his brother spit it out. _round one to me_. “so, I’m wondering if I like the same foods? Bananas apparently” they ate a whole hand of bananas. “I dare you to try pears” dr. brown challenged.

“that’s disgusting! I’ll never been human enough to eat those things” he laughed.

“try it ... you know you want to” he taunted him.  Yes, they were getting along like brothers. “you know we should go to **Villengard**  and get some more bananas.”

“pears” dr. brown teased.

“fine! I’ll eat a bloody pear! On one condition”

“what?”

“you tell her” he knew his brother couldn’t stand to not be challenged.

“fine! We’ll go to **Villengard**  and I’ll tell her”

“seriously? No take her to new, new earth. Have that picnic and tell her.”

“you’re right” he sighed  
“of course I’m right” he smirked “I’m you.”

***`***

After getting Mickey and Martha set up at Torchwood, Captain Jack Harkness went home to America to spend the 4th of July and some quality time with his friends Lucas Ashton and Jacob Glass. It had been a while since they have been in touch. Jack always tried to catch Jacob’s rock band Succumb whenever he was in England Jack’s main base. Lucas and Jacob had been lifelong friends. Jack became friends with Lucas when they were at college. Jack was also here because he wanted to see a certain blue eyed blond and neither Jacob or Lucas fit that bill. Although she had a heartbeat none of Jack’s charms worked on her. Instead she just regarded him as a good friend a brother like she did Jacob and Lucas.

 

The door opened to the back and in walked this long blond hair girl. She stood about 5’5 inches. She had her hair in a ponytail and wore a set of red scrubs underneath a lab coat. On her scrubs were Mjolnir, thor’s hammer, and pictures of the Australian actor that played the Norse god of thunder in the movies. She always joked that thor was her ‘daddy’ because of her crush and she found out that she had a trace of Scandinavian in her DNA per an ancestry test. She even had a hammer as a keep change alongside her other true love Daffy Duck. ‘Hey boys!” she smiled as she came in. she saw Jack. “Captain Cheesy!!” she smiled big and gave him a big hug. “princess Leia!” was his nickname for her. They rocked back and forth in an embrace. “so, are you saving the world one planet at a time still?”

“are you saving lives one stitch at a time” he smiled at her. “oh man it’s good to see you!”

“you too!”

“oh Lils’ your package is in the lab.” Lucas spoke up.

“did he finally ditch his wife and fly up from Australia?” she giggled. That was always her joke when getting mail. “close Cardiff”

“oh, even better!” she got excited.

“only Lilly can get more excited about a bunch of knobs from Torchwood verses a hot man coming to see her” Jack laughed.

“of course, dumpling. I have you three hotties and you don’t do anything.  Besides I’m on a mission.”

“oh boy” Jacob and Lucas said together.

“hey!” Lilly laughed.

“someone wrote one of those articles and Lilly is bound and determined to prove the wrong.” Lucas explained to Jack. “it’s hard living with a genius” Jacob sighed.

“I know I lived with The Doctor for a long while.” Jack laughed. “hey! I do the same thing to my own articles.  It makes me honest and makes me sure that I don’t make known errors!” with that dr. Lilly Patrick went from an 18-hour shift as a neurosurgeon/chief of staff to dr. Lilly astrophysicists. Jack noticed the look on the boys faces. “what?”

“she’s running” Jacob sighed. Jack knew Lilly but he’s never spent a whole lot of time with her. He’s never seen her in full on manic mode. To him this was normal because of being with The Doctor. “what do you mean?”

“she works until she falls apart. When she falls apart it’s not pretty. I can’t deal with it this time.”

“what does she do?”

“Monday, Wednesday, and Friday she works all day at the hospital. Tuesday and Thursday, she teaches advanced molecular biology, advanced genetics, and astrophysics at school. She’s also working on her masters in architecture and finishing her doctorate in psychology. Saturday, she works in the er and on Sunday she gets ready for the week. She’s having nightmares again. See Jack her mind never stops. It never relaxes. When she sleeps she has the nightmares and then she doesn’t sleep for a couple days. She’s all the time trying to prove herself.”

“to who?”

“Satan”

“Satan?”

“that’s what we call her sperm donor”

“Lilly has a kid?  
“no her father”

“I see” to say Lilly has daddy issues is like saying The Doctor likes bananas.

“sand that’s just half the year. The other half she’s the superstar” Jacob made air quotes around superstar. “when we were kids she was in a successful band. A couple year ago an old agent wanted to make her a star again. In America, she’s big. She’s going to do an European tour the second half of the year. So, you see Jack, we’re worried.”

“how come Lilly’s never mentioned this?” Jack opened to her about Torchwood, the planets with the daleks and earth moving, The Doctor and how he’s not really from around here. On the flip side Lilly showed him the hospital what she does every day. She even convinced Jack to dress up like one of the villains on a new superhero show that’s out and is super popular in the United States. He was a spitting image for the hero’s sister’s dad. Jack loved it because he got to entertain the kids. He’s a big ham and he got to play a bad guy. He’s sat in on a couple of her lectures but she’s never talked about all that she does do. The boys laughed. “Lilly brag about herself? You’ll never hear her do that. She doesn’t even really like being called Dr. Patrick. The girl has so many degrees that they need to invent a new alphabet to put after her name but she just wants to be known as Lilly. “she hates braggers.” Lucas got up and opened a drawer. He pulled out an envelope and tossed it in front of Jack. “this is how our princess is.” Jack opened the letter it was from the Nobel foundation, Jack’s mouth hung open. “she…she.” Jacob and Lucas shook their heads yes. “did she accept it?”

“no and I won’t” she came upstairs from the lab.

“why? This is a huge honor!” now it was Jacks time to plead the case for the Nobel prize for medicine. “because that’s for people to brag about. Oh, look at me. I’m a Nobel price recipient. Please I don’t fit in with those people. I look at it this way. Regardless if I’m the queen of England, or princess of Ashtonglass my grave will be the same size as yours, yours and yours.” She pointed to all three of them. “how do you figure you don’t fit in with them?”

“because” she sighed “all they do is kiss everyone’s ass. I’m no ass kisser. My ass kissing boots were replaced by ass kicking boots years ago. When I find the cure for pediatric cancer then I’ll think about it. Besides I have my boys to brag about. I don’t need to brag about myself.” She kissed all three of their cheeks and walked back to the lab. Jack was stunned. “she doesn’t like people knowing just how smart she is” Jacob sighed. “she said when people find out how smart she is they treat her different. Honestly that’s how the whole princess nickname came about. I saw how smart she was when we were kids and she made me feel inferior. I started calling her princess mostly because I had a crush on her and to make her mad. She hated it but all these years later she’s still our princess. When I told her the reason she actually cried. She was so upset that she made me feel bad that she vowed to never treat anyone different. That was years ago and she treats the lady at the grocery store the same as she does the dean of students at her school.” The comment about the lady in the store got Jack’s gears turning. He was dropped off before the doctor took Jackie back. He hasn’t been in touch with them so he doesn’t know about Rose and the metacrisis. To the best of his knowledge The Doctor is in the Tardis with donna. He knew how much The Doctor loved Rose but Jack could see The Doctor and dr. Patrick either hating each other intensely or falling deeply in love. They were quite similar. “and she’s single?”

“oh yeah as big a genius as she is, as big as her brain is her choice in men leave a lot to be desired. She could be talking to you and unless you’re walking her down the aisle she has no clue you are even interested. She’s fairly clueless when it comes to that.”

“I don’t think she’s so much as clueless as she is guarded. She’s had some horrible relationships. She’ll never tell you about them. The only way I know is because I was there and he walked in on a situation that was happening” Lucas pointed to Jacob. “so, we don’t try to get her hooked up with anyone else they pass the test.”

“test?”

“oh yeah we love Lilly like a sister. If Mr. wonderful even thinks about laying a hand on her he’ll pay. I don’t care if it is the Aussie hottie or if it’s that skinny Scottish detective she likes. Although” Lucas laughed and looked at Jacob, “I think now our little princess can take care of herself. Did we also mention she got her black belt in karate in near record time? God help anyone that releases the tiger mama.”

‘tiger mama?” Jack chuckled.

“that’s Lilly. She will fight to the death to save me and Jacob. She calls us her cubs. Have you ever seen a tiger in the wild around her new born babies? That’s Lilly around us.” He chuckled “I have to admit it is kind of hot when she gets tigered out as we call it.”

“what does she do?”

“she gets up in their face and will not back down. She won’t be pushed around. If she can’t physically fight them then she does what we call the Vulcan nerve pinch. She gave it some medical name I couldn’t tell ya but she said it’s just a pressure point. You have to be careful with and her being a doctor she knows how to use it. I’ve only seen her use it once but that was enough for me” he laughed. “but damn it was hot” he laughed. “this tiny five foot nothing girl going up against his big tall dude because he was being a douche bag to a girlfriend of mine was hot. Then she went all tiger mama on her for breaking my heart. I tell ya Jack it’s the quiet ones you have to look out for. She’s never started a fight. She’s an expert marksman but she doesn’t carry a gun. She’s talked about taking up archery because of that show she got you to be the bad guy for the kids but she’s not started that yet. She’ll never seek out violence but she’ll be hot damned if she runs from it. She’s a feisty one our little Capricorn.” The wheels in Jacks mind were spinning. She was blond, feisty, not afraid of fighting, can take care of herself and is a doctor and genius on an extraordinary level. Oh yes, she ticked all the boxes that he thought a certain man in a brown suit would like. “excuse me boys I’m going to watch girl genius in action.”

 

     Jack walked down the hall and pulled up the latch in the floor. He walked down the steps and as he got closer he heard music blaring out. “and she’s a head banger?” Jack chuckled as he listened to the tunes of Motley Crue blaring out of the lab. Quite fitting the song was of course Dr. Feelgood. He took out his phone “ok doctor I have someone I want you to meet. She’s gorgeous, feisty, and a genius. I think you’ll like her.” He opened the door and watched from the door frame. She had the music blaring and singing along. She was flipping switches and running around manically. Put her in a brown pinstripe suit and a brown wig on her head and it would be just like his best friend was in there. Lilly had zero clue she was being watched. She went over to the stereo and turned it up to 10. Which doesn’t sound like a lot but once Lilly got done with the speakers it was basically rattling the windows. Finally, she looked up and saw Jack. “oh, hi doll face!” she chuckled. “this is the PERFECT song to do a Paso doble to. I have it all worked out in my head. I never told Lucas this but that show in England _strictly come dancing_ I think it’s called they wanted me to be a contestant. I chuckled at them because” she ran her fingers through her hair and scratched the back of her neck. _Oh my god they even have the same nervous ticks._ “well never mind” she smiled and went back to her equation on the board. “uh Lils do you mind” he pointed to the speaker.

“oh yeah sorry” she chuckled shyly. “it helps me think.”

“really?”

“oh, hell yeah nothing better Jackie boy than getting on my bike,” she pointed to the Harley Davidson in the corner, “putting Vince and the boys on and fly up and down the highway. Let’s just say when you deal with life and death everyday it kind of numbs you. My adrenaline rush is speed. One of these days I’m going to get me my royal blue, 1969 corvette sting ray convertible either learn to fix it up myself or have someone fix it up. Nah I’ll do it myself it’s boring to have someone know what they’re doing” she chuckled “and see how fast I can actually go. But alas that’s in the future.”

“why royal blue?”

“oh, because blue is sexy” she smiled. “everyone talks about red and yeah that’s nice and it messes with your head. Literally Jack it messes with your head why do you think you prefer McDonalds over other restaurants or people have red kitchens. Blah red is cliché. Take royal blue or like a cobalt blue or cerulean blue its calming and relaxing. When you’re calmed and relaxed magic can happen. Besides blue is the color of the sky and you don’t see people make wishes on rocks of lava nope you see them making wishes on stars in the blue sky and it’s my school color” she chuckled. The way she went on a diatribe about the color blue was very sexy. She didn’t say anything in particular but just the way she annunciated the words. “besides with red it’s just there oh look at me I’m red but with blue you have various shades. Is it going to be darker or lighter and I have a thing for being up at the crack of dawn just before the sun rises and its fading from a dark navy to a more vibrant color. It’s almost like playing peek a boo” she smiled at him.

“Lilly are you trying to seduce me” he chuckled.

“please Jack if I was trying to seduce you you’d know it.”

“and, how would I?”

“because you wouldn’t know what hit you till the morning after” she winked. “oh, a banana” she giggled and peeled back the banana like nothing had happened. Nothing had happened but she was very easy to get lost the description of something as simple as a color. “have a banana Jack. Good source of potassium. Keeps your smile picture perfect” she chuckled.

“someone else I know loves bananas.”

“that’s because they are smart.”

“so, tell me Lilly” Jack chuckled. This was one box he was checking out for giggles. “how do you feel about pears.”

“I love pears.”

“well they can’t all be perfect can they doc?” Jack chuckled into his phone.

“now peaches gag a maggot. I love peach flavoring but I’d rather be put in jail than to eat a peach. The fuzzy covering a peach” she shuddered. “how can people eat those nasty things. It’s like taking a bite into a tarantula. Oh, I think I just grossed myself out with that image.” Jack cracked up. “ok so what can I do you for doll face?”

“just wanted to see you in action”

“oh yeah so much going on here” she chuckled and took the banana peel and shot it into the wastebasket across the room. She then went over to a dry erase board and marked off two tics under her name. “two points for Lils although…I was kinda far away should I make it three? What do you think jack was that a three pointer?”

“I have no idea what you are talking about”

“Jack Jack Jack” she sighed and looked crushed. “don’t tell me that in the 51st century they don’t have basketball? I mean hello I am a girl from Kentucky and if there’s one thing we’re known for beside horses booze and fast women, none of which is me by the way, its basketball. You come around in March doll face, bring some ear plugs, and you’ll see yours truly in rare form.”

“why what happens in March?”

“it is the most wonderful time of the year for a girl like me. the closest thing I could say is it’s like the Europa for soccer…err football. For a basketball junkie like me it’s Christmas, new year’s, my birthday and hottie aussie wrapped into one” she chuckled, spun around in her chair, and looked at him. “tell me Jack in the future do they have the super bowl still? Do my cowboys or lions ever make it back?”

“Lilly, you know I can’t tell you things like that.”

“oh, come on it’s not like I have a machine to go bet on it. Well…. not yet”

“what do you mean?”

“well…” she scratched her neck. She took her hair down and flipped her head over. She put it in a ponytail on top of her head. Jack chuckled as even though they were talking about the future Lilly looked like a character from the past. “love the look pebbles” he chuckled at her.

“oh, that reminds me! I’ve been trying to use it.” She opened her drawer out dropped her head down and when she came up she had a bone in her ponytail. “ta da!” she giggled. Jack cracked up. “I know its cheesy BUT I do anything for a laugh and thank you captain for being my victim today. So now I have a moral question.”

“you’re asking _me_ about a morality question?”

“yeah you’re right” she bit her lip “but of you three stooges you’re probably the one most equipped to handle it.”

“I don’t know about that” he chuckled.

“well boy genius and boy wonder would probably not listen they just humor me. I haven’t annoyed you enough to totally drown me out.”

“I’m used to rambling. My best friend has a gob like no one else” he chuckled.

“yeah I only do that around you three. Put me in a room with a bunch of strangers and oh hell no you won’t get a peep out of me.”

“why?”

“I get nervous and actually I am quite shy.”

“you shy?” Jack laughed a full belly chuckle. Lilly just smiled.

“yeah actually painfully” she looked down.

“you’re serious?”

“yep”

“you’ve overcome so many other things why can’t you overcome that?”

“because it’s easier for me to keep my secrets and thoughts to myself.”

“really” he said surprised.

“yeah plus when I do get to be a chatty Cathy people start looking down on me and well that just makes things worse so it’s best to always be the turtle.”

“always wearing your shell”

“yeah.”

“so, what was this morality question?”

“never mind” she got nervous again.

“Lils if I can’t answer it then I have the resources to get the answer.”

“yeah but is it really one that needs resources? It’s kinda like a door number one or door number two”

“what if the door opens to moor doors and you can’t get out?”

“oh, I like that one! See Jack you are a genius” she chuckled at him. “no if you find out something that literally could be earth changing would you keep it to yourself knowing no harm would come or would you share it and risk some idiot getting their hands on it?”

“how earth changing?”

“you wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”

“Lilly, I told you I’m from the 51st century. The earth was literally moved and I helped guide it back. I run an institution where we deal with unbelievable try me princess.”

“well there was this idiot uh colleague that wrote this article on time travel. He basically said it was impossible. That what happened to the planet didn’t really happen and basically just thinks we’re all sheep following the news. Homegirl here doesn’t watch the news. I was in surgery that day and nearly lost a patient when the planet moved. I’m a turtle not an ostrich and if you want to get technical I’m a goat…Capricorn here. Anyway, it just REALLY infuriated me that he basically called me a liar. He didn’t directly but he insinuated that anyone that believed the earth really moved and the planets weren’t used to make a weapon were fools and needed to have their head buried in the sand forever. So, I was challenged. I don’t take well to being called names so I had to disprove it. If you don’t know by now I’m a dog with a bone on things at times especially when it comes to my intelligence. Anyhoodles I figured out the equation.”

“you did?”

“yeah”

“so, what’s the problem?”

“I haven’t tested it out yet and not sure I want to”

“why?”

“because I know me. I’d go back to some place like say the titanic. I’d do anything in the world to stop it from happening. Imagine all those people living because the titanic didn’t sink. That would be awesome, right?” Jack smiled and nodded his head. “yet here’s the issue because of the Titanic’s demise things were changed in the shipping industry. What if saving all those people caused even more catastrophic things? And … and … and if I could do that then who’s to say I couldn’t turn evil and be a vigilante?”

“do you have that in you?”

“no, I couldn’t but if you hurt an animal, kid, elderly person or handicapped person I will go bat shit crazy on your ass and who’s to say I wouldn’t stop. Having all that power would be intoxicating but extremely dangerous. You know the old saying about borderline genius and insanity. It wouldn’t be that hard to cross that line. That’s the moral dilemma. I wanna try it. Go back to the store yesterday and get more bananas” she chuckled “but I don’t know. If I said anything some Jackass could get ahold of it and cause more havoc. Not only would I be responsible for figuring it out but I’d be responsible for the chaos that was caused. Like I know me. after my first dream trip id go back and warn Abraham Lincoln to not go to the play. I’d sneak up on Jack the ripper and help figure out who he is. I’d go back to the 20s and 30s and meet al Capone. Who knows might even be in a bank bonnie and Clyde robbed. That sounds so intoxicating but I’m afraid I wouldn’t be able to keep my mouth shut and want to help people. That’s the Doctor in me wanting to help and oh my god if I had some kinda of medicine on me that wasn’t invented then. That’s the moral dilemma. Could I live with the knowledge of knowing that on this date so and so did this and I couldn’t stop it? I think that’s why we don’t do it to many unknown variables. But alas I’ll put this away and move on to something else” she sighed. Jack smiled at her. She was so much like The Doctor it wasn’t funny. “so, Lilly, assuming it was possible if you could go anywhere in the world in time and space where would you go?” he flashed his biggest smile at her and made sure the p hone was still recording. He noticed how her dark blue eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. “promise you won’t laugh?”

“I promise” now Jack was intrigued.

“if I could go anywhere it would be for two days in 1968” she sighed and got a far off look on her face. She even started blushing and propped her feet up on her desk. “1968? That’s random why?”

“I want to witness” she started giggling like a little girl. “I want to be there when Elvis films his 1968 comeback special. Leather jumpsuit and all” she sighed she actually went to sit back in her chair and fell out of it. Her and Jack started laughing hysterically. “wow wasn’t expecting that kind of reaction” he chuckled at her. She sat back in her chair and had a far off look on her face. “yeah Jack I may be smarter than your average blond but I still a girl. Besides if I went it wouldn’t be pretty. I’d melt like a puddle of ice” she laughed and threw her banana peel in the trashcan. “ok that was definitely two points.”

“you are just too cute” she laughed at her and pinched her cheek.

“watch it Harkness.” She laughed and swatted his hand away. “so, is there anything Torchwood needs help with? I’ve burned through that theory and now I don’t have anything else so I’m going to go stir crazy.”

“how about parallel worlds?”

“what you mean like maybe in Elvis’ world he’s married to a Lilly Patrick and Jack Harkness is a little shih Tzu? Jacob is actually his tour manager and Lucas is well my kid? Oh, that’s interesting. That sounds like a cheesy little story that needs to be written.” She took out her blue notebook. “there once was a man named Elvis” she started scribbling and glanced up at Jack. “no do you think they really exist? Like every action here can have a reaction there and vice versa? Oh my god can you imagine their version of Hitler? How can you get back to your original universe…would you want to? Hmm thanks Jack” she reached over and kissed his cheek. “now I’m on a mission” she erased her chalkboard and started doodling on it like she always dose to get inspiration. She was in another world so Jack left as she was no longer paying attention to him being there. _oh, doc you are going to have fun with this one_ he sent him the video in a text message. _she’s like a hot female version of you. Let me know what you think._

           

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwi-mYXOgILVAhXCYSYKHWngC0AQjRwIBw&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.pinterest.com%2Fexplore%2Fpebbles-flintstone%2F&psig=AFQjCNHPQgD5n1FTYUN-tfo0M-IDtSRdDA&ust=1499889138993243 picture of pebbles


	6. Chapter 6 – Leather Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dr. blue has to come to terms with rose and dr. browns feelings. he also has a flash from the past as someone from his 9th incarnation pops up

Chapter 6 – Leather Angel

Dr. Blue had finally encouraged his brother to admit his feelings for Rose. After a while he gave him an ultimatum either he tells her or he’ll stop playing nice and go after her himself. It had been long enough and he was tired of the pussyfooting around. Finally Dr. Brown gave in found a perfect day for New, New York and took Rose out to tell her the truth.

It had been about six months since Dr. Blue had come around. He swallowed his pride around Rose and although he still loved her he was letting go of some of the deeper feelings he had for her. She was cordial around him but it was nothing like what it was around his brother. It honestly hurt but with his brother’s help he was growing his own Tardis. It would be a while before it was done. He contemplated looking back on his old companions to see if maybe one of them might like ago around. He hadn’t heard from Jack in a while. Partly because he wanted to test out his human body and partly because he needed a friend, he found his brother’s cell phone he was never one to use it, but he saw there was a message from Jack. Dr. Blue chuckled at the message. “What is that earth phrase speaking of the devil?” he chuckled as he went to read the message. I think you’ve met your match with a wink emoji was the message. Dr. Blue chuckled because it was just like Jack to try and hook him up. Dr. Blue didn’t think anything of it so he started the video. Then as he got a closer look at Jack’s muse his single heart almost stopped. No way! … no … no it can’t be. he was shocked. He sat there and watched the video with a smile on his face. He chuckled when she made a comment about bananas being a good source of potassium. He watched as Jack never picked up on it. That was something his ninth incarnation had told him. What Jack didn’t know was he wasn’t the first person he told this too. He couldn’t wait for Dr. Brown to get home just to confirm his suspicions. However, he knew. Beyond a shadow of a doubt he knew.

He watched the video several times then remembered the articles. He ran to his room and flipped through the books. He read the article and sure enough there it was he knew partly why he was drawn to her. He gave her just a little advice about twenty-five thirty years ago and it looks like she ran with it like the good girl he knew she was. Oh my Angel Rayne you did it! He smiled big he actually got a tear in his eye. Surely his 9th incarnation thought to check back but if he did why didn’t he remember it? He was excited. He wanted to check up on her. If she remembered him at all he’d not look like this. The one she met was all gruff, leather and ears. She even got to see a little of The Oncoming Storm, the nickname the daleks had for him. Now she was grown up and mature. She was younger than Rose when he met her. Now she’s in her late 30s early 40s. He couldn’t wait for his brother to get back. He sent Jack a message. “How do you know her?” “Lilly’s a friend. She’s great doc you’d like her” he even gave a wink emoji again. “I can arrange a meeting if you’d like” Dr. Blue’s heart sank. Was he ready to meet her? She’d never know who it was. He wanted to talk with his brother. “I don’t know” he sent back. “Well she knows about me and my friend The Doctor and she’s open minded. If you want to meet up just tell me.” Dr. Blue didn’t say anything for a few minutes. He didn’t want to act all eager and he really wanted his brother’s advice. “oh, doc I’m sorry. I forgot about Rose. Just... just forget I mention this.” “no…no its’ ok she’s happy now” “what happened? I know you had to take Jackie back. Did she stay there with him like you planned on?” “no things didn’t go according to plan. They’re both here.” “what? How… how’s that working out?” “great we take turns” he sent it to be a smart ass. “wow doc didn’t know Rosie was that kind of girl! Come to think of it didn’t know you would be either. Good for you” wink emoji. “I’m not Jack.” “we’re going to have to get together” “Rose is with my brother. Dr. Brown the time lord one. I’m the twin the half and half one.” “Oh yeah sorry I didn’t know. I thought this was the time lord one. So, she still picked him” “yeah” “oh man how are you doing?” “I’m ok. It’s a bit weird now. How long has it been for you?” “about a year” “yeah we’ll have to catch up. See ya later Jack” he took his phone and fixed it to where the video was on the big screen in the media room.

He watched that video over and over until his brother came back. He ran to get him when he heard the Tardis doors opening. Then he saw him and Rose kissing. He felt like such a third wheel and very uncomfortable. He turned to leave when Rose said hi. He politely waved and turned to leave. “What is it?” Rose said to him sweetly. He turned around and looked at his brother. He gave him a scowl that made him wish he really wasn’t around. “Uh nothing…never mind. Something I watned to show you” he looked at his brother “but it can wait.” “what is it?” Rose smiled. His heart still kind of melted when she smiled at him. He looked at his brother who still had a scowl on his face. “um it ... it … it is just something Jack esen” he smiled. Remember Angel Rayne he thought to his brother. Yeah She’s grown up. “well show us” Rose smiled. “yeah show us!” now Dr. Brown was intrigued. They went to the media room. Dr. Blue put it on it was playing heavy metal music. She still likes her rock and roll I see Dr. Brown thought to his brother. Wait till you see her. They watched the video. Dr. Brown looked over at Dr. Blue. That’s really her, isn’t it? I’ve watched this a dozen times I believe it is. Rose was looking between them. She knew they were doing the telepathy. “Bananas good source of potassium” she huffed. “I’ve heard that one before. I know you two are doing your telepathy thing so tell me who she is.” “she’s…she’s no one” “she can’t be no one. If he’s dying for you to see this and you look like you’ve seen a ghost. Besides that, jacket looks very, very familiar. Now tell me who she is!” as many times as they’ve watched it neither one noticed the jacket on her Harley Davidson. “a long time ago” Dr. Brown started. “In our 9th incarnation” they saw Rose smile. “I …uh … he…we went to a biker bar in Los Angeles.” “you went to a biker bar?” Rose started cracking up. “oi it was a day off and we went to see a band play!” “anyway” Dr. Blue continued “there was this girl there. She couldn’t have been more than 18, 19. She had black hair with blood red streaks. She had this leather jacket and hot pants and army boots. Her name was Angel Rayne.” “what was she a stripper?” Rose snarled and laughed. “NO!” both snapped at her. “She was in a band called Bitter Pills. Anyway, she was sitting at the bar. She had just been beaten up and was drinking a bottle of whiskey. I don’t know why but something about her caught my eye. I was sitting next to her trying not to get involved. Her set was over and the bar tender threw her bag at her. I saw a book on quantum physics. So, I asked her if she was going to school. She smiled and told me her cousin wanted her to but she can’t because she’s stuck. She was in a contract and her no-good boyfriend would beat her up if she didn’t bring home the money. She didn’t make enough that night so now she was in trouble. I asked her what she meant she just said he’d beat her until she same it up the rest. That’s why she was drinking because hopefully that was the night she’d end up not waking up. I told her she didn’t have to do that she chuckled at me and asked how she was going to get out of it. I saw her other books and I knew she was smart. Finally, someone came over and started to pick a fight with me. She literally threw him up against a wall and told him to leave us alone. He was scared. Finally, she sat back down apologized and we talked some more. She asked me if I wanted to leave. I said sure. Then someone came up from behind and grabbed her and me. They threw her to the ground knocking her out. I went off on them.” “Did you go all Oncoming Storm on them” she chuckled seeming like she was a little jealous. Dr. Brown looked down on her and furrowed his brow. Rose got a glimpse of the Oncoming Storm. She joked about. “yes, I did” he said flatly, coldly and enough venom to let Rose know this wasn’t some joke. “When they were through I went over and picked her up and took her to the motel she mentioned she was staying at. She was out cold. I made sure she didn’t have a concussion and she was ok. Her wallet had a number on it. It was for John Patrick. I called and asked him if he knew a girl by her description. He said yes it was his niece. I told him I was The Doctor and he thought she was dead. I told him no but she was smart and needed to get away from this lifestyle. He told me he was going to get her to come clean because he knew there wouldn’t be a next time. He lived in Kentucky so he had to take a plane out to Los Angeles. While we were waiting I went back to the Tardis and got her some pajamas and other clothes. I went back and she was awake. She took a shower and dried herself off. That’s where I saw the bruises and realized that behind the punk, tough girl exterior was a scared run of the mill girl next door with blond hair and deep blue eyes. Something told me she never let anyone see that version of her much less a stranger. I knew then she trusted me. she slowly let down her defenses and we began to talk. We went to an all-night diner. They had an all you can eat pancakes meal. I told her she should try the banana pancakes. She took me up on it. I’m glad she did because she was starving. You can tell she hadn’t ate in a long time. She was looking very sick and pale. You could see the needle marks and the bruises on her arms. When she was with me you can see the light start to come back into her eyes. There for a while we were the only ones in the diner. When people started to come in I could see the fear creeping back. It was like she knew if someone saw her she was going to be in trouble. I told her as long as I was around she was going to be ok. She even confessed to be worried that they’d hurt me to get back at her. I told her she didn’t have anything to worry about we’d be ok. For some reason, she believed me and trusted me. We talked for hours that night. I knew she was smart. We talked about her schooling, science, math, music everything. I had a banana in my pocket and cut some of it to put on her pancakes. I told her bananas are a good source of potassium. For some reason, I don’t know why but that struck her funny. She even accused me of using that on all the girls. I joked with her and told her I might start using it. She had the prettiest smile. Her smile, her genuine smile, would light up the whole room. The morning shift of people started to come in and she was getting nervous. She was afraid someone was going to see her with me and then we’d both be in trouble. I took her back to her room before her uncle arrived. She even laughed and told me she didn’t even know my name. We just talked like we knew each other our whole lives. I told her my name was John Smith. She chuckled and didn’t buy it at first but went along with it. She even told me it’s better than leather angel which is what she was calling me in her head.” Both boys smiled at that memory. “She asked if I’d stay with her till her uncle got there. I told her I would and she laid her head on my shoulder. I told her I expected her to do things with herself since she got a second chance. Told her I might hunt her down one day just to see. She laughed and told me if I ever got hurt to go to the hospital. She was going to be a doctor and she’d be honored to fix me up. Told her it was a deal as long as she kept bananas around. She laughed and told me she would and as you can tell from that video apparently, she still does. Then she laid down and went to sleep. The covers were disgusting. It was a little roach motel so I took off my jacket put a note in there about a physics equation and told her the world expected her to make better use of her talents than to let some jerk take her down the wrong path. She’s much brighter, prettier, and smarter than she gives herself credit for and that Eddie, that was her boyfriend, manager at the time, is a jackass for treating her anything less than the queen she is. To stop letting him have space in her life and to make sure that she studies real hard and gets that degree. And when she does and gets to be world renown to always remember where she came from. Told her someday she never knows some old guy from northern England may come into her hospital and need bandaged up and I actually signed it her leather angel. I put the jacket over her shoulders and left before anyone could see. I met her uncle he seemed like a great guy told him what happened. He asked my name just told him I was a friend. After that I went one with my life. Before I knew it, I met you and we had our adventures. I regenerated and figured she probably forgot all about me till Jack sent me this video.” “so, you never knew her real name?” Rose asked “no to her I was John Smith and to me she was Angel Rayne. That was all that needed to be said. We knew odds were we’d never see each other again and truthfully, I didn’t know if she’d even go back with her uncle. I stayed around long enough to watch him take her away and then I went back into the Tardis.” “you weren’t even curious what happened to her?” Rose asked. “I was” Dr. Blue mentioned. “I was going to look up the doctor in the articles but we’ve been busy. The tardis actually played a song for me a few months ago and I didn’t know what it was and it never dawned on me but the voice sounded familiar. It was her voice only it wasn’t a song I knew of. She’s actually been on my mind quite a bit here recently.” “do you think she’d remember you or recognize you?” “nah I was in my 9th carnation. Remember how you were when I regenerated? I did that right in front of your eyes. This was a girl from years ago and for all I know she probably thinks it was a dream or a drug induced hallucination. I think part of the reason I left her the coat was so she’d realize it was real. I loved that coat too” he chuckled. “thankfully the tardis had another one for me.” “you really liked her, didn’t you?” Rose smiled at Dr. Brown. “she was a kid Rose” “yeah and so was I” “it’s different” “how so?” “it…it…” “yeah we did like her.” Dr. Blue admitted. “sometimes I wonder if things would have been different what would have happened. I wonder if she’d even give us the time of day now. I wonder if what I said made a difference in her life. If she even remembers it or even tries to pass it on to someone else.” He looked down at his hands. He really wishes now he wouldn’t have watched that video. You’re going to get me in trouble brother! You can’t let on like that how much we really liked and cared for her. Remember we were like big brothers too her. “well I have the answer to your problem. I’ll just call Jack.” “NO!” they both said together. “why not?” “because…she’s probably got a family and a proper life now. She probably doesn’t even remember.” Dr. Blue tried to stop her. “boys let me tell ya something about your little friend here. That’s your jacket from your past life. I recognize that jacket. If I recognize that jacket and I was around you for over a year and she’s kept it this long you meant something to her and possibly still do.” Rose got up and took Dr. Brown’s hand they started to walk out the room together. Dr. Blue looked at them too. He was all of a sudden sad because he wasn’t getting to have the life with Rose but his brother who truthfully he knows has loved her longer gets to but he also wonders if he’ll have someone like that to care about him. Rose came back over to him. She kissed his cheek. “I want you to be happy. Look her up!” she whispered then left. Dr. Blue grinned at her and watched the video over and over picking up on little things he said to her all those years ago. “that’s my Angel Rayne” he said softly as he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope you guys are enjoying this and people are actually reading it lol


	7. Chapter 7 – Chances Are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an old friend resurfaces

Chapter 7 – Chances Are

     It had been a couple months since Lilly saw Jack . He was a pretty boy just like Lucas and Jacob and he knew it. He wasn’t shy about anything. He’d flirt with a nun if he’d want to but he was just a friend to Lilly. They even figured out somehow they are related on her father’s side. They spent July 4th together before Jacob’s band and Jack  went back to England.

     Lilly never told the boys why but as she was in her office downstairs she looked at her Harley. That jacket was on it she smiled as she put it on. She wears it whenever she needs to wear a jacket. “Twenty years tomorrow” she smiled and sniffed it. The scent had faded away but every now and then she gets a whiff of  her leather angel. He said his name was John Smith but she knew that was about as real as her being Angel Rayne. He saved her life on more than one occasion that night. He actually bought her food. Lilly hadn’t ate in two days. “Banana pancakes” she smiled.  “Good source of potassium” he told her. She remembered joking with him about it being a pick up line. He teased her about always making sure to keep bananas around when she became a doctor. Partly as a joke and partly as an homage she did keep them around in her office and her receptionist office. She even has all the nurses on a code English.  If a white man comes in with an English accent to page her immediately especially if he uses the alias John Smith. So far she’s not had any such pages. She wasn’t in love with him, she was only 19, but she wanted to properly thank him. She wanted to tell him how much of a difference he made in her life that night. She was literally going to find a way to end things that night. She remembers sitting there looking at her drink contemplating all the ways she could succeed this time. The others were a cry for help that sadly when unanswered. She was going to take the glass in the bathroom bust it open and she even drew the lines on her arms where she would make the cuts. She has a brave smile now but back then Lilliana Patrick was a very troubled young girl.

That night after she met him she put down the booze and the drugs. She saw hope in his eyes for her. She saw someone, a complete stranger, have faith in her. She’s never saw that before. Every day when she’s having a hard day she reads his note and it keeps her going. She remembers the look in his blue eyes. He had seen a lot in his 40ish years she could tell. He had a hard life but when he looked at her his eyes were so tender and soft. She felt like a peace come over her when she looked into his eyes. She trusted him with everything she had. She went to stay with her uncle that night. The cry for help was finally answered. Every October 21 she flies out to Los Angeles. She goes to where the bar used to be. It’s changed at least a dozen times since then. She goes in orders a glass of Jack Daniels and sits there for an hour. That’s how long she sat there before he came in. She says a small prayer that if he’s still alive he’s ok and happy and that somehow he’ll know what an angel he really was to her.  She doesn’t drink the drink instead she leaves a note. _To my leather angel. If you show up have a drink on me._ She leaves the drink there and walks away. Then she goes to where the diner was. It’s a used car shop now. She remembered how her physics article, he was into astrophysics and they talked about the stars and the planets. There was a juke box and someone played Prince’s “Purple Rain.” She joked about if there’s a planet out there that actually rains purple how cool it would be. She made a little joke about how she remembers the Latin names for the constellations. She makes up little stories about them. She rattled off the new one she was inspired by Prince. He laughed and actually enjoyed it. “Can you imagine walking on a different planet? What the customs would be like if there is life out there. I’m sure there is because everything happens for a reason. What would be the reason for having Saturn if there’s no life? I mean I know the reason but I wonder if they walk around with rings on their head to match the planet’s rings” she laughed.

“I had a dream once that I was on a planet named Barcelona. The funny thing was there were dogs and they had no noses” he laughed.

“Oh my god can you imagine that?” she laughed. She continued laughing “that sounds like a bad joke ya know. Like a cat without ears or humans that look like cats. I just kinda wonder what things are like out there. Sometimes I look outside and make up stories about this star. I always look for Orion’s Belt. I think Orion has been eating because his belt seems to get bigger at times” she laughed. “If you could go to any planet where would you go?” he asked her,

“Personally I’d like to discover my own planet and go there. Everyone’s like oh lets go to Mars. I don’t want to do that because everyone else is wanting to. I’d say” she thought about it a second and smiled “how about Pluto? Maybe there’s mice up there with high pitched voices and big ears” she joked about Mickey Mouse. He laughed at her “is that a joke about my ears?” he smiled. “Oh my god no!” she blushed “I didn’t even…”

“It’s ok” he flashed a cheesy smile “Angel Rayne maybe there are” he chuckled. “And I think if anyone has the potential to find a new planet it is you because you are fantastic” he bopped her on the nose. She chuckled. “I’m not really that great” she said shyly.

“Oh yes you are. I bet you can ask anyone in this diner to name a galaxy and the only one they’d get would be milky way and that’s probably because of the candy bar.”

“Thank you John that means a lot” she smiled at him.

“Don’t sell yourself short. You have the potential to make something of yourself. Don’t let that punk dictate your life. You dictate it. You’ve got sass use it.” She was slowly gaining her confidence by listening to him. So when she wrote her first article that was published she dedicated it to her leather angel. _I took the sass and ran with it. I did it all because of you_. She didn’t think he’d read it. Every cd she put out in the liner notes she wrote that. She also wrote little silly things they talked about like dogs with no noses and one word Barcelona. She even named a cd of hers Barcelona and specifically recorded it in that city. It was her biggest cd yet. People have questioned her on who the leather angel is and others have come forth and said they were that person. She never mentioned anything about him or even said a gender. When they said they were him she smiled and told them they were not. The only person that knows who he is, is John Smith and Lilly. Jacob, Jack, and Lucas don’t even know.

      She rides her Harley to clear her head. She’s getting ready to go on the road. The first time ever she’s going to Europe. She’s been there a lot personally but she’s never toured Europe. She’s excited because it’s a big jump in her career but more than that she hopes that her angel may come to the show. She’s got her biked tuned up. She always does daring things in her show so to end the show she’s going to ride on stage from the back of the arena and do a cover of “Kickstart My Heart” by Motley Crue. It was that band after all that her angel went to see before he found her. He didn’t know it but that was her favorite rock band, well besides Echo and that was only because her cousin was the lead singer. She made sure the jacket went with her. Besides that letter that jacket was her most prized possession. She wouldn’t take all the money in the world for either one.

 ~~~**~~~

      It had been a couple weeks since Dr. Blue watched that video. He couldn’t bring himself to look her up. He sure as hell couldn’t ask Jack. He was driving his brother and Rose mad. “I swear Doctor if you don’t look her up I’m going to call Jack and tell him you want him!”

“Rose” he groaned.

“What are you so afraid of?”

“I don’t know…it’s not like she’d remember me.” She gave him “the look.” She tilted her head and looked at him through her bangs. “Ok fine! She wouldn’t recognize me. What am I going to say oh yeah I was the one that saw you all those years ago but don’t worry I have a great thing called being an alien and regenerate. So now I don’t have big ears and blue eyes. I have brown eyes and bad skin. Oh but don’t worry I’m only half alien now. Yeah Rose that will go over really well.”

“I think you’re afraid she will recognize you.”

“What? No how could she like I told you I look COMPLETELY different. I’m a different man.”

“Your eyes” Rose smiled.

“What? No he had blue I have brown” he pointed to his eyes “big difference”.

“Doesn’t matter” Rose smiled “she’ll know.”

“What am I supposed to say?”

“Just talk to her like you would me or Sarah Jane. Get your Donna on!” She pushed his arm and smiled. “You don’t understand Rose” he walked away exasperated. He didn’t know why he was so upset and nervous. Truthfully he did.  She was gorgeous. She could be the model of many magazines. She was even voted one of the most beautiful people in the world by some magazine. She had men wanting to be with her and women wanting to be her. She was a trend setter. She even had her own perfume line. He knew because Rose bought some before she knew about her. He loved how it smelled. He thought it smelled just like he remembered how she smelled like honeysuckle and sweetness. _Rassilion Doctor get ahold of yourself!_ She was smart, funny and he was afraid she’d be disappointed and rather have blue eyes number 9 back than him. At least he looked her type leather jacket and beer joints. She admitted in a magazine once that her celebrity crush was the Australian that played Thor in the movies. He definitely had blond hair and blue eyes. His inner Donna was coming out. The insecure part that is. What did Dr. Blue look like? A college professor. Suit and tie, although not fully tied, and his converse shoes. He could pass for any teacher. _Yeah definitely not her type. She liked the bad boys_. He managed to find the jacket and put it on. He remembered wearing it all the time but it didn’t fit him in this incarnation and she’d see right though his attempt. “Oh blimey! What are you thinking you daft git?” he told himself. He hung up the jacket still feeling insecure. _Rassilion I hate human emotions!_ “Alright get your best blue suit we’re going.”

“No you two go” he told his brother.

“Oh no! You’ve sat out long enough! Besides I need you to help me with Rose.”

“Why?”

“Wellll ….” He scratched the back of his neck. “Her favorite band’s playing and we don’t want her running off with that Jacob Glass guy.”

“Oh so you want me to help tame the wild beast?”

“Consider it payback for not dropping you off in Barcelona the planet not the city.”

“Alright fair enough” he laughed “but why do I need to get my best blue suit?”

“Because there might be some girls there that like you and I can’t have them getting us mixed up.” He chuckled. The truth was Dr. Brown was up to something. “Here use this one” he tossed him and electric blue pinstripe suit. “As Rose would say it brings out your eyes.” Dr. Blue threw he jacket at him.

~~**~~

     It was now close to Thanksgiving in the United States. Lilly was on the road in England. She had gone through sound check and made sure the ramps were as she liked. She was a musician but she wasn’t one to stand and play an instrument and sing. She saw one of her heroes in concert Keith Urban and he literally would go in the crowd at least one point during the show. Lilly wanted to make sure her fans got the best view possible. She’d go down ramps up into the lower level somehow made it to the upper levels at times and back. Her security team definitely earned their salary with her. With the house lights on she couldn’t really see faces past a certain level but she’d always try to reach out to her fan base especially little kids. She was also a dare devil. She’d get in this as she call it _Mork And Mindy_ egg shape seat as she called it and be carried around the stadium while playing a mandolin. Today someone dared her to zipline through her intro. That’s one thing her crew knew if she was dared and even better if they put money on it she’d do it. She was a pistol both to work for and with.

 ~~**~~

    

     “so, I bet you’re excited! Going to see Succumb” Dr. Blue looked at Rose. She just smiled and played her part. “Oh yeah Jacob Glass he’s hot!” she fanned herself. “And Jack said he’s single. The Doctor’s not wanting to take me backstage afraid he’ll lose his spot” she laughed.

“so that’s why he’s been acting weird!”

“what do you mean?”

“kind of nervous like … like ha ha!” he chuckled. “He’s scared! Oh, this is great this is going to be great! I hope we’re up close.”

“You’re just loving this aren’t you?” Rose chuckled.

“Oh yeah I haven’t been to a show in a while and looks like I might get two! Oh, make sure you throw flowers on the stage Rose” he cracked up and walked away. Today was going to be a good day. Rose cracked up at Doctor Blue. If he only knew.

 

~~**~~

 

     Lilly ran through the show and even did the zip line three times to get a good landing. She was excited nervous and ready. She told her crew that if someone came through with the name John Smith to let the party through. She had hoped beyond hope but never thought It would happen. “Jackie boy!” she gave him a huge hug.

“boy it’s good to see you!”

“oh, it’s so good to see you! How have you been?”

“Busy! You know one night I’m here, next night I’m there.”

“Hey, I wouldn’t ask but some friends of mine…”

“Jack, you know friends of yours are friends of mine” she smiled and signed autographs for them and told him to bring them backstage. He said he would then Lilly had to leave and get ready for the show.

 

~~**~~

    

     Dr. Blue fixed his hair to stick up in the right spots. His electric blue suit with light blue shirt and white tee under that really popped. He went to the console. “Well don’t you just look dashing?” Rose smiled.

“is it too much? I don’t want to look stupid.” _Wh_ y _am I even caring?_

“oh, believe me I think you look just fine” she looked him up and down. He chuckled at her and called her out on it. “Rose Tyler are you checking me out?” he blushed and laughed at her.

“let’s just say I won’t be the only one Doctor” she winked and walked away.

     The three of them walked into the arena. Dr. Brown got their tickets from Jack who was in on it. They would be sitting 4th row from the stage on the right. Dr. Blue was eating some cotton candy and didn’t pay attention to the posters on the walls. Jack was telling them about how him and Jacob Glass, Rose’s ‘crush’ were best friends and how he got permission to bring his pals backstage. Rose squealed with excitement. “Aw Rosie he’s just like the three of us! But you’ll adore him.” It was all a part of the plot Dr. Brown had gotten tired of his brother’s delay on looking up their friend. He knew how his brother felt about her, he kinda felt the same way however his heart belonged to another lovely flower. He took it upon himself to call Jack and explained the situation. He told him not to tell Lilly. He didn’t want to freak her out. Jack was genuinely moved at the care for his friend. Everyone was in on the plot except for the two stars of the show.

     Dr. Blue was eating popcorn and a hotdog not paying attention to what was going on. He thought it was pretty cool that there was a nice mixture of both male and female fans in the audience. There was no opening act as the show would be well over three hours long. There was no announcement suddenly, the houselights went down. “Oh, I’m so excited” Rose giggled and took some cotton candy from Dr. Blue. The strobe lights and lasers in various colors illuminated the arena when Dr. Blue saw the girl in front of him wearing a shirt with Lilly’s face on the back. Suddenly it hit him then what was going on. He had been played. He looked at Rose, Jack and his brother. He was not amused.

     The first few beats of the song started. There was a hologram silhouette on stage. Then another few beats and a silhouette on the side of the arena. Another few beats there was one on the back and then the other side. It was all a ploy to change it up so no one in the arena knew where she was coming from. By the time the chorus hit, there came a zipline down with a girl with long blond hair, a leather Jacket and dark jeans on. She landed hard on the stage on both feet and laughed during the song. While she was singing and clearly not lip synching she got out of the harness. When she finished the song, she turned to her band. “HA!” she laughed and turned around. “So, here’s the deal. These geniuses dared me to zip line. Not only did they dare me but they didn’t think I’d do it. So of course, you know what that means?” the audience roared “I had to do it. So, guess who’s getting paid tonight! HA!” she laughed genuinely. “Here’s a tip. Never, ever bet against a Capricorn. We’ll do it or die trying!” she laughed and the audience roared. “yeah and now the die trying part is kicking in on my foot” she giggled “but if there is one thing about me is I’m a fighter” she smiled and limped over to one side trying to walk it off while singing the next song.

     Dr. Brown and Dr. Blue looked at each other while she was talking about being a fighter. They smiled because they knew first hand she wasn’t kidding. _She’s got our jacket on._ Dr. Brown thought to his twin.

_She grew into a true beauty._

_I’m so proud of her._

_I guess you know Jack is going to take us back to meet her. He doesn’t know about her and nine. I figured that would be something you can tell her._

_No…no…he…_

_You need to_

_What am I going to…_ he couldn’t even get the thought out as Lilly went down to the crowd to their side skipped Jack and smiled big at Dr. Blue. He couldn’t help but smile then she looked at Rose and his brother shook Rose’s hand and gave a thumbs up walking away. Dr. Blue at that moment felt like he did when Cassandra possessed Rose and she kissed him. He didn’t want to feel flabbergasted but he had this dumbfounded cheesy look on his face.

 

~~**~~

   

     The pain in Lilly’s foot wasn’t easing up even as she hobbled around. She knew she needed to prop it up to ease the swelling but she was nothing if not a showman. She took a bow after the second song and hobbled back. The lights were dark and the crew brought out some ice and put it on her foot as she sat down at the white baby grand piano. “When I get nervous I ramble” she giggled “and laugh sorry it’s an annoying quality. I joke at the most in opportune times. So ya know as a joke we’re supposed to have the mood set up here with blue candles, love blue by the way, best color ever and a bottle of Champaign which is strange because 20 years and one month sober like I’m going to break that streak.” There was a loud thunderous applause. “But with the way my foot hurts” she giggled “I know shut up and sing goldilocks” she took the Champaign bottle and a ceremonious display busted it on the piano. “Damn…uh oh uh…darn” she chuckled and caught herself “that felt good” she laughed as she propped her foot on the piano bench and played a cover of Reo Speedwagon’s “Keep On Loving You.” In only Lilly fashion of multitasking she sent Jack a giant smilie face text. She knew he knew what that meant.

 

~~**~~

 

     “Ok she likes one of you two” Jack chuckled and showed them the text “when did she do that?” Dr. Blue asked him. “When she was singing and not playing the piano. She does that at times to keep from getting bored.”

“which one?” he texted back and said out loud. She still had her leather jacket. He could tell when she got it because he could see her try to remain professional and sing but that cheesy smile came across her face. She didn’t dare look at him because she would break out in a giggle. That was the relationship he had with her. They would just look at each other and laugh.

 

~~**~~

 

     Lilly walked over to the middle of the stage to get a ‘drink’ of water. Her back was to the audience as they played a snippet of a prerecorded video. It was telling the audience about how if they are in an abusive relationship to get out and gave the number. Lilly however was texting Jack. “being your friends’’, is she with both of them?”

“no”

“blue?” she bit her lip

“no” then little sent a smilie face emoji

“DON’T SAY ANYTHING!!!!!” she texted back but if she knew Jack it was too late. As she always did Lilly belted her heart out about the song about being an abused child.  She was having a hard time standing on the hurt foot so she was thankful for the Mork from Ork chair. She propped her foot up and played a little mandolin on the song about being happy. “I call this my Mork from Ork chair” she laughed as it let her back on stage “and its actually very comfortable” she laughed.

     Lilly smiled through the rest of the song. “so, for one of my day jobs I teach school.” There was a big applause and cat calls. Her band paid her back for the bet by playing a snippet of Van Halen’s “Hot For Teacher.” Lilly cried she was laughing so hard. “That’s just NOT RIGHT YOU GUYS!” she admonished her band. “And you guys don’t get excited sparky. I teach advanced astrophysics, molecular biology and advanced genetics. HA! My secret comes out I’m a nerd” she laughed. “and don’t think oh she’s an easy teacher no sir ree I’m not” she laughed. “So, one semester my little stars … see what I did there? Yeah I love puns” she giggled. “yeah cheesy I know I love puns anyhoodles they had to memorize the Latin version of the constellations. Just curious can anyone even name an oh I don’t know a galaxy? Besides milky way WITHOUT using Google? If you can I will give you a backstage pass.” She went over to the first couple rows. People had no clue. “See kids pay attention in school. There might be a pop quiz in the future” she laughed. “So, I let my students in on a little trick I learned from a very, very dear friend. We spent a couple hours doing this one night after I got into a bar fight and let’s just say it was a draw. He had more blood on him than my friend and I did but I was the one that got knocked unconscious. So, we’re sitting at a diner. So here goes Pauo and Perseus rode their Pegasus to Phoenix to watch Pictor and have some Piscese and Piscis. Austremius at Pxyis, Puppis in the purple rain. If you can repeat that I’ll give ya a pass in my class” she smiled. “That song was on when we were doing that so to my dear, dear friend. I don’t know where or if you’re still around” she bit her lip and tried to keep from crying “I sing this song every night and think of you because you were fantastic!” she closed her eyes and sang “Purple Rain” as if there was no one else in the audience.

 

~~**~~

 

     The Doctors both put their heads down. Dr. Blue could feel Jack’s eyes on him and tried as hard as he could not shed a tear at the memory but the more heartfelt she sang the harder it got. “You ok doc? Good news she likes you” Jack flashed his cheesy smile. ‘yeah I’m ok” he smiled. “just brought back a special memory is all.” He watched as Lilly belt her heart out still wearing his jacket. He even saw a tear go down her cheek as he looked at her face on the monitor. “that’s my girl” he smiled.

_She still remembers pauo and Perseus’ adventure. I forgot about that and she remembers it._ His brother spoke into his head. _I don’t know if I can talk to her. What am I going to say? Oh yeah, I’m the one that gave you that Jacket? She wouldn’t believe me._

_When we get back there we’ll play it by ear. Besides I know she likes you._

_How?_

_She never so much as looked at me but she’s looked at you at least a dozen times._

_She’s not LOOKING at me you git. She’s looking in the audience._

_Right just like she’s ‘looking’ in the audience now and not smiling at you. Go get her tiger!_ Dr. Blue’s face started turning pink. Jack nudged him whenever she came by. She wasn’t making it obvious as she’d go to different rows and up to the side of the arena as she was playing the guitar and singing a very tongue in cheek duet. She actually had a blue guitar with a picture of the country of England. She went up into the side of the arena and after a few seconds of playing took a sharpie out of one of the pockets. She autographed it and pointed to some little girl in the seat and took it off and handed it to her. “Here you go doll. Hope you enjoy it!” she smiled and took selfies in the crowd. She hobbled over to the security team and they helped her down the stairs. She walked up the aisle and slapped Jack in the back of the head and laughed. Dr. Blue laughed at Jack as he rubbed the back of his head. She hobbled back to the stage hobbling on her bad foot. “she’s mad because I showed you her text” he laughed at her.

     As the show went on Dr. Blue watched as Lilly brought up a young girl about 8 to the stage. “so sweet pea thought you might want to enjoy the show from up here. Come on boys” they brought out a vinyl blow up neon blue seat. “Not sure about the view but you can hang out with me.” the little girl’s eyes were as big as baseballs. She gave Lilly a hug. “so, what’s your name love?”

“amaryllis”

“like the flower?”

“yes”

“AWESOME SAUCE! US flower girls have to stick together don’t we. Power in the petal” she giggled “yeah that was cheesy even for me” she laughed and took the girls phone and took a selfie. “say flower power” the little girl giggled. “so, who are you with?”

“my aunt and my mum.”

“what’s your mom and aunts name?”

“Kelly and Kaylee”

“hi mummy and auntie! Where are you?” they waved and the spotlight was put on them. “she’s a doll and I bet in a few years she’s going to be breaking hearts and taking names” Lilly giggled at them. “she already does” the mother said.

“alright! You go girl!” she fist bumped the little girl. “Marcus, you know the drill” she spoked to someone off stage.

     Lilly went on with the rest of her show. Dr. Blue noticed how her voice was so much more powerful. It wasn’t that scared little mousy girl voice he first heard all those years ago. His Lilly sprouted and became a confident, beautiful and dare he say it sexy woman. He could tell her foot was bothering her but she wouldn’t let on like it was. She was brave. She played every instrument on that stage and not just to show she knew how to play a song she knew how to play it proficiently. She mentioned how she used to be really hooked on drugs. She was in abusive relationship. Then one night after she talked to her friend she went to live with her uncle. She was then that she found herself, got cleaned up and the most important thing to her, her faith. She said how she used to listen to Elvis and he would sing a certain song in his set. Someone told her once that might be the most important song she ever sings so every night she sings it. As if an angel came down and anointed Lilly with angel power Lilly sang her hymn with every ounce of soul and feeling she could muster. Once again it was only her in the room. The tears running down her eyes. She was singing to whatever she believed in. When she was done she blew a kiss to the heavens and as if she forgot where she was she was shocked to see everyone in the arena, Jack, Rose, and The Doctors included were on their feet tears pouring out of their eyes. “thank you” she cried “thank you so much” she hobbled off the stage. “Lilly just took us to church” Jack said softly.

 

~~**~~

 

     Lilly hobbled off the stage half adrenaline, half exhaustion and half pain but the show wasn’t done. She came out again this time in a University of Kentucky, (her alma mater) sports jersey with number 25 and Patrick on the back of it. She sang about growing up in America. Then she took an American football. “let’s see if my inner Joe Montana and Troy Aikman would be proud” she laughed as she concentrated and there was a hole spinning in above the audience. She threw a spiral and it went right through the hole. “HA!!! It went through! Guess who has to pay up again?” she laughed at her band. “And girls let me tell you do not absolutely do not let anyone tell you, you can’t play sports or rugby or soc…uh football is only a boy’s sport. I’m here to tell you there is nothing wrong with being a tomboy just like there’s nothing wrong with being a princess. You never know it might come in handy.” She laughed then sang her biggest hit about how someone dared to cheat on her and she showed him who’s boss. She thanked them took her bows blew kisses and hobbled off the stage. The Doctors went to get up. Jack stopped them. She came back out for a three-song encore then left the stage again for a second time while the band kept playing. She hobbled her way to the back of the arena and got on her Harley. Her hair was wet with sweat but long and flowing. She revved her engine much to everyone’s surprise this little country girl as her image comes off as, came flying down the catwalk that took up the whole center section of the arena. Fireworks were going off on all sides and above. She squealed her tires and did a wheelie as she landed center stage wearing black skin-tight leather pants, a Motley Crue concert shirt and her beloved black leather jacket. The music’s blaring and the lights are flashing everywhere. “if you have never listened to anything I said tonight then listen to this. No matter what happens in your life. No matter who comes or who goes. No matter what pain you are in it is all temporary things will get better I promise! and never, ever be afraid to rock and roll!” her foot is in excruciating pain. The audience is revved up and she is giving everything she has to finish her homage to her friend, mentor and her favorite rock band. People can say what they want but they can’t say she didn’t put everything she has into it. Lilly looked down at Jack. He was surprised to say the least. She winked at him. She went to each side took bows, shook hands, took selfies, blew kisses and signed autographs she made her way around the arena and then back up on the stage as the band was still playing. When she got back to the center of the stage she blew one final kiss took a bow and grabbed Amaryllis hand. She put the helmet on her head and put it on tight. “hold on tight doll” and put her on the bike. They rode down the center of the arena into the ramp. The camera following them everywhere. When she got towards her dressing room the little girls mom and aunt were there. They all waved Lilly took a final bow and thanked the audience. With that the lights went up and the smoke cleared. Lilly wobbled into her dressing room with the little girl and her escorts in tow.

 

~~**~~

 

     Jack sat there stunned for a moment. Dr. Blue looked at his brother. Their smiles couldn’t be bigger. _Was…was…was that our little Lilly?_ Dr. Brown asked his brother in his mind. _That…that…that was our girl! I don’t know if I should be proud, scared or excited_ he laughed. “that…that…that was amazing!” Rose squealed. “that was so not what I was expecting” Rose smiled big.

“I … I … I can’t say what I’m thinking” Jack laughed. “yes, I can! My cousin just kicked ass!” he was so proud of her. “come on Jack you are taking us backstage!” Dr. Blue smiled at his friend. He didn’t care anymore now. He was star struck and had to meet her.

     They made their way back to Lilly’s dressing room. “ha! Ha! Ha! You didn’t think I’d do it so pony up! Come on come on” they watched her. “you boys should know me by now!” her hand was out. “and not to sound like a big baby but please someone get some pillows and ice. My foot is about to kill me.” she fell on the couch. She took her boot off. “yeah in my quest for stubbornness I did myself a really good job” she laughed at the little girl. “I apologize if it’s not the most attractive thing” she propped her foot up. They got her some ice and pillows. “can you get me my bag? Please” she asked the guy she called Marcus. He gave her a black bag with blue sequins on it. “this is my day job bag” she laughed. “I have a ton of stuff in here” she pulled out a stethoscope and various other items. “ok so you’re going to get a little crash course on my other side” she laughed at the little girl. She felt around her foot. “I obviously don’t have an x-ray machine in here which would be awesome if I could but let’s see what’s going on here. Sprained” she felt around “it’s not broke which is good. Wanna have a listen?” she asked the little girl and pulled her stethoscope out. the little girl got shy. “it’s ok. It’s actually really cool” the girl took the stethoscope. “put these in your ears and listen” she put the other end up to her heart. “that’s my heart beating isn’t it cool?” the girl smiled big. “here let me see yours” she put the ends in her ears and listened to the girl’s heart. She was trying to remain positive but she wasn’t liking what she was hearing. “here breathe for me doll” she listened to her breathing. Lilly was getting a little worried. She put on a brave face. “see that’s what I do when I’m not bouncing around like a loon” she laughed. She was kinda worried about the little girl. Jack and the doctors could tell by the look on her face. She didn’t even know they were in the room. “hey doll can you have Brady show you his drum set? He likes to show off his drums to everyone. He’s proud of them” she looked at brady.

“yeah come on Amaryllis” when the little girl left the room. Lilly looked at the two women.

“you probably don’t know me other than what you just saw but in real life I’m a doctor, a neurosurgeon. It’s probably nothing but has Amaryllis been to the doctor recently or has she been sick recently?”

“no why what’s going on?”

“her heartbeat was erratic. I tell ya what. I don’t have the facilities here obviously but here’s a number” she pulled a note pad out of the Jacket. “this is Doctor Jones. She owes me a ton of favors. Give her my name and tell her I said to see you asap. Don’t worry about the cost or anything and please this is my number to my office. Please tell my nurse what’s going on. I can’t help it I worry too much.” She smiled at the mother. “please take Amaryllis to see Doctor Jones. If there is something wrong she can fix it. If not then she’ll get ahold of me and together we’ll work something out.”

“so…so…so you’re a doctor?”

“yeah in America. I … I was just trying to show her how cool a stethoscope can be and that’s when I heard the wheezing in her lungs and the erratic heartbeat. Oh, and Marcus” she looked at her manager “did we collect everyone’s debt to me?” she laughed.

“yes” he sighed “everyone ponied up although they think they shouldn’t have too since you went and made yourself a klutz … AGAIN!”

“well I’m nothing if not consistent” she laughed. “I would find a way to trip over air and to be honest I think I have” she laughed. “oh here” she pulled something out of her Jacket and wrote something down. “don’t read this till you get home and calm down.” She handed the mother an envelope. “alright Marcus let’s get the star of the show and bring my bike here please.”

“Lilly”

“don’t make me get up from here” she laughed. After a few minutes Marcus brought her bike in as well as Amaryllis. “ok doll let’s get some selfies and everything here” Lilly wobbled over to the bike.

“miss Patrick you are the best” the little girl hugged her.

“aww thank you and please miss is for old ladies. Do I look old? Wait don’t answer that” she laughed. “you can call me Lils.” Lilly still hadn’t noticed that Jack and his posse were back there. They were watching her interact from a distance every one of them had big smiles on their faces as they saw Lilly go way above and beyond the call of duty when it comes to entertaining her fans.

     After a while Lilly was getting tired it was obvious and it was obvious her foot was hurting. Kelly and Kaylee took Amaryllis after getting one last hug and left the building. Lilly had a brave face for the little girl but after she left. “ok help I can’t fake it anymore” she called over to Marcus. He helped her back to the couch. She propped her foot back on the pillow. “please for the love of god tell me I have one in here” she looked through her bag and pulled out a syringe. “thank you, Jesus!” she took the syringe and gave herself a shot. “oh, kick in please kick in” she laid back. She closed her eyes for a second just trying to wind down. “Lils you’re in a lot of pain we’ll just meet up another time” Jack told her much to the chagrin of The Doctors. Her head flew up. “I don’t think so doll face!” that killer watt smile spread across her face. “I’d give you a hug but I’m in leather and sweat and something tells me you’d enjoy that” she laughed. “oh, thank god the medicine is kicking in” she laughed as she saw the other three that were with him giggle. “you are not right in the head Lils” Jack laughed.

“of course not! I’m right handed which means I’m a left brained girl. We’ve had this discussion before. Sorry I crack really bad jokes when I’m nervous” she looked at the other three but they couldn’t help but notice her smile and her eyes focused on Dr. Blue. “have a seat. Just kick those stooges out” she waved a hand at three of her bandmates. “we’re going to go back to the hotel”

“that’s awesome knock yourself out” she smiled at them then she turned to Jack. “ok Jackie boy stop being so rude” she laughed and grimaced at the pain in her foot.

“are you ok?” Rose asked her.

“yeah lord knows I’ve twisted and sprained my ankle more times than Jack’s flirted with someone so yeah this is old news. Couple days my paw will be healed” she waggled her toes. “but thank you for asking I appreciate it.”

“well Lils remember me telling you bout traveling with The Doctor?”

“oh yeah!” she sat up curious now. “and Rose well it’s obvious which one is Rose. Hi” she waved to the fellow blond. “hi” Rose chuckled.

“wait let me see if I remember because Jack tells a lot of tales…barrage balloon 1941 hits on you by Big Ben and boy did that sound like an euphemism” she laughed. Rose cracked up and shook her head yes. “yeah with a Union Jack shirt chasing after this kid with a gas mask on.”

“Jack now you leave out the good parts. Did you find the kid?”

“oh yeah it was quite something. We’ve been friends ever since. How do you know Jack?”

“let’s see him and my best friend Lucas met in school. So, I met Jack through him. We were doing genealogy and come to find out Jack is my by the time he comes around 17th generation cousin on my dad’s side which is truly mind blowing but we just consider him the black sheep.”

“hey”

“don’t worry doll face I’m there with you. Hell, I’ve had the whole barn to myself till you came around” she laughed and threw a pillow at him. “just for that I’m keeping the pillow”

“knock yourself out” she laughed. “ok so which one of you is the infamous Doctor?”

“I am” both of The Doctors spoke up.

“wow that doesn’t get confusing at all” she laughed.

“you can call me James Smith” Dr. Blue shook her hand. She smiled at him sheepishly and shyly. He smiled his biggest smile at her. “Hello” she said softly. “Nice to meet you” he didn’t know if she felt it but he felt a spark when he shook her hand. “and I’m John Smith” Dr. Brown shook her hand. They could hear an audible gasp come from Lilly and they watched as the blood drained from her face.

 


	8. One Night With You

Chapter 8 – One Night With You

    

     It literally looked like Lilly was going to pass out as she took Dr. Brown’s hand. “Are you ok Lils?” jack asked her. It took a second for Lilly to get her composure. _She remembers_ Dr. Brown thought to his brother. “Lilly?” she shook her head “oh yeah uh” she looked down and realized she was still shanking his hand. “Oh god I’m sorry” she let go. She bit her lip. “Are you ok Lilly?” Jack asked again. “Uh yeah…yeah I’m sorry” she blushed. “Didn’t mean to go Norman Bates on you” she laughed nervously. “Its…a friend I had a long time ago went by that name and he was British so it just kinda threw me for a loop. I’m so sorry.” She straightened herself up and put on a brave face the entertainers face she called it. “So Jack’s told me about traveling with you but he never mentioned there were two of you.” She looked at Dr. Blue.

“probably because it’s a long crazy story” Dr. Blue smiled. Even thought they were twins and Dr. Brown introduced himself as John Smith Lilly kept her eye on Dr. Blue. Maybe it was because she knew Rose was with Dr. Brown he didn’t know but it was a little obvious now. _Get her tiger_ Dr. Brown thought to his brother.

     Before they could get into much discussion Lilly’s stomach growled. “Maybe we should let you get something to eat” Jack stood up signaling they should probably leave. _Are you serious Jack?_ Dr. Brown thought. _I’ve worked too hard to get this moment. “_ No sit-down Jack! You know I don’t eat before a show. however, can you have Marcus bring me my stash?” _that’s my girl._

“why sure cupcake” Jack laughed.

“behave and I’ll share” she threw a pillow at him. “I can’t eat before a show. I’ve been doing this since I was a teenager and I have this vision of eating then getting sick on stage. Yeah not fun. I have horrible stage fright. My friend Jacob keeps telling me to picture people in their underwear. I told him I quit that years ago when Grandpa Noah came off the ark and into one of my shows. I got the worst image and fell off a riser twisted my ankle and kept laughing. Why I just admitted that to you I have no idea” she laughed nervously. “let’s just say I’m a world class klutz”. Marcus brought her a meal. “this is more than I can eat here help me.” she took one of the bananas. “it’s so stupid the things you remember. My friend I talk about in the show he made some crack about bananas being a good source of potassium we talked for hours and that’s one of the things I remember. It’s in my contract to keep fruit especially bananas. I’m so sorry he’s been on my mind a lot recently and here I am rambling.”

“what happened to him?” Dr. Blue asked innocently.

“He left. Didn’t say goodbye just left. Eh that was years ago. He’s probably pushing up daisies now” she chuckled.

“you never know” dr. blue said.

“so, you never saw him again?” Jack asked curiously.

“nah he was the one that got me through a really horrendously bad time and then he was gone. Helped get me set on the right path and for that I’m forever in his debt.”

“almost like an angel” Rose smiled she was playing along.

“yeah that’s what I think” Lilly smiled. “well anyway you can google anything about me so tell me about you three. What kind of doctors are you? She kept looking at dr. blue.

“well … I’ve got multiples but I guess astrophysics.”

“really?” she lit up and smiled.

“yeah” he smiled.

“so, you probably were the only one that understood the whole purple rain thing?”

“Yeah” he smiled

“alright! Jack pay up” she laughed.

“doesn’t count I brought them to you”

“I have a bet with jack that somehow somewhere when I’m on the road I’ll ask some form of question and someone is going to get it. However, I guess now he’s cheating” she threw another pillow at him. “watch it cupcake you’re running out of pillows.” He laughed at her.

“just because my foot hurts don’t mean I can’t use the other one to kick your ass dumpling” she laughed at him. They had this playful banter going on. Lilly and Dr. Blue reached for a banana at the same time. Their knuckles touched and she blushed and let go of the banana. “go ahead” she said softly.

“no, you go it’s your meal.”

“here” she took it and split it with him. “my hands are clean I promise but you can have this end” she handed him the half with the peeling in it. He took it and smiled. “I knew a girl once that wouldn’t eat the buts as she called it of a banana.”

“I’m like that” she laughed. He knew because she was the girl.

“but Lilly it’s the same on both ends” he chuckled at her.

“I know but it’s a psychological thing” she laughed.

_“_ and we got a whole pickle once she wouldn’t eat it.”

“Has to be cut in spears” they said together and laughed.

“see it’s a psychological thing. I have no idea what it is. Maybe I should use myself as an experiment and see what causes it” she laughed.

“I’d like to know too” she smiled big. “she was a trip” he looked at her.

“what happened to her?”

“she left me” he said softly.

“oh, I’m so sorry! … I didn’t”

“no” he smiled “its ok we weren’t together or anything”

“do you ever see her?”

“I haven’t seen her in a long time but something tells me she’s still the same sweet girl I knew. Maybe one day I’ll get to see Rayne again” he looked at her and took a drink of water. _Oh, smooth one there doctor. See how she reacts._

“her name was Rayne?” she looked surprised.

“yeah very beautiful and sweet. She was one of these girls that are oblivious to how beautiful they are.”

“those are the best kinds” Jack smirked letting Lilly and dr. blue realize they weren’t the only ones in the room. “Lilly wrap it up please” Marcus her tour manager announced.

“well I guess that’s our cue” jack stood up. He looked at Lilly. He could tell she was crushed. “you need anything Lils?” she looked up at him with wet eyes.

“sorry you know how I am with goodbyes” she laughed and wiped her eyes.

“I know sis but if you need anything text or call me.”

“I will” she kissed his cheek. Dr. Brown gave her a hug next then Rose. Las but not least Dr. Blue gave her a hug. “keep looking for your friend. You never know he might still be around.” He kissed her cheek. She felt the same bit of electricity she felt when their knuckles touched. She noticed he smelled of musk and shampoo. He smelled masculine and very sexy. She held on to him for a little longer than she probably should have. “you too. Go find your friend” she kissed his cheek back.

     They left and Lilly laid back on the couch. Her mind was racing. Her jacket was nearby. she held it and cried partly because her foot hurt, partly because of her friend and to her surprise another part because she didn’t want to see James, Dr. Blue, leave. She enjoyed talking to him. It was like talking with her leather angel all over again. The softness in his eyes and the tenderness. She got to a point where she forgot there were other people in the room. Marcus helped her to her room. She took a shower and cried her heart out. after a few minutes, she was unable to sleep.  She texted Jack. “do you think the bar is still open?” she was going to come clean with Jack and tell him about her friend. She had to tell someone.

“what’s wrong?”

“my mind won’t shut off”

“I’d say it is but Lils you’ve gone this long”

“I know I’m not going to drink I just … I have a lot on my mind.”

“need a friend?”

“honestly cap yeah I can use one.” Now what Lilly didn’t know was Jack had sent a text to Dr. Blue telling him to get to the bar. His dream girl would probably be there.

     Lilly wobbled down to the bar. Her foot was easing up thanks to the shot and the anti-inflammatory she had taken. She sat down at a table and propped her foot up. She was alone in her thoughts cracking the peanuts for about an hour. She really didn’t care if Jack came or not. She was enjoying being alone. She was enjoying the solitude, she didn’t have to put on a show for anyone and she could be just a random person.

     The room was clearing out but she didn’t care. She also didn’t mind that Jack didn’t show up. Maybe she was right to not tell him and yeah, he was with his friends. He probably had to take them home. She forgot about that. She sat there drinking her Pina colada. “I make a mean banana daiquiri.” She looked up and saw his smile. Her heart leaped and her neck all the way up to her eyelids turned the very shade of red that was the candle on the table. She in one thought cursed Jack Harkness for sending him the text because she knew he did it because now she looked like any girl. She didn’t have makeup on and was in a pair of pajama pants and tee shirt and in the next thought wanted to kiss him for sending the text. “Dr. Smith hi!” she smiled and admonished herself for sounding like a high-pitched schoolgirl. “please call me James”

“sure of course please have a seat” he sat down next to her. She could feel the heat radiating from her as well as her nerves starting to get the best of her. She could sing in front of 50,000 people no problem but to talk to someone one on one she knew she’d screw it up. “how’s your foot?”

“well thankfully it’s still attached” she shook her foot then admonished herself for being stupid.

“well that sounds like it was a close call” he chuckled.

“yeah I thought I might have to call in the big guns but it listened to reason and decided to stay she giggled and he laughed with her. “so, about the daiquiri I do make it without alcohol as well it tastes better. Enjoy the banana more” he winked at her. Her smile took up her whole face and she prayed she didn’t just squeal like a little girl when she laughed. “think we can get Norman Bates to let you make us one?” he looked at the bartender.

“he does look like him, doesn’t he?” he giggled.

“I’ve been sitting here watching him with the knife and thanking god I already had my shower.” She chuckled and he laughed heartily which made her laugh harder. “well if you see him with a knife yell and give me a warning” he laughed and put his hand on her shoulder as he walked towards the bar. When he was out of earshot Lilly squealed like a little girl. _Calm down goldilocks. He’s probably got a girlfriend anyway. All the good-looking ones do or they are flexible like Jack._ she enjoyed watching him walk away. She shook her head. She wasn’t that kind of girl and didn’t have those kinds of thoughts. She shot jack a text. “I don’t know if I should hate you, hug you, kiss you or hit you right now”

“how about thank me” he attached a smilie face emoji. “I’ll dance at you guys wedding.”

“BAHAHAHAHAHa” she texted back.  

“love you Lils and I know I’m not the only one” he sent with winking emoji. She put the phone away before James came back and saw her text. _Dance at my wedding if only_ she admonished herself. Before too long she was smiling as he was bringing back two glasses of a fruity flavored drink. “I see you survived Norman” she chuckled.

“oh, it gets better!” he chuckled “his name is Tony” Lilly choked on her drink as they cracked up. “you mean to tell me Norman Bates twin is really named Anthony”

“yes!” he laughed

“oh my god I … I … I couldn’t make this up if I tried! Oh, imagine this he goes home so someone named Norma!” she forgot and put her hand on his gently. “Imagine if … no I’m getting carried away” she chuckled.

“what? he smiled

“what…oh my god” she looked around “James you do realize where we are at right?” he looked at her puzzled. “We’re in a hotel!” both leaned forward and tried to not draw attention to themselves as they laughed. She was crying. “oh man thank you thank you thank you I needed that laugh.”

“you are quite welcome. Glad I was here then.”

“me too” she smiled gently. “you made a mistake with this drink.”

“what?”

“you didn’t tell me how addicting it is” she giggled. He smiled his biggest smile at her. “well I’ll have to make some more”

“just bring the stuff here it will save you several trips”

“I might after Norman finishes with the knives.” They both giggled. “so how long are you on tour for?”

“oh I finish up around Christmas and then around valentine’s day I go back to my real job.”

“so, do you live in America then?”

“yeah in Chicago now. What about you? What’s the story with you and your twinsy? When did you start traveling with him?”

“how much has Jack told you?”

“just that he’s from the 51st century. He traveled with an alien and his girlfriend in a blue police box and oh my god now that I say it out loud I sound mental for believing it” she laughed. “well in fairness I didn’t buy it at first. I thought I took some special medicine that day but then I saw things happening in London and then I was like ok everything makes sense now.”

“so” he took a deep breath like he wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear this answer. “you’re ok with me being alien?”

“honestly and I seriously mean no offense or disrespect but it’s different. I … I don’t know what I was thinking actually.”

“how so?”

“well you look like us well human. You talk like humans but you’re not. I don’t mean to sound bad but it’s kinda fascinating and scary at the same time.”

“go on”

“well you’re easy to talk to and very human which is the fascinating part but and I’m sorry it’s the STUPIDEST analogy but when I was a kid there was this show called _V_. I loved this show.”

“about the aliens that took over earth?” he asked smiling.

“yes! I got all into it. However, the one I really liked I think it was the leader I don’t remember pulled back her skin and it was green and scaly and scared the beans out of me. so, I think the little kid in me is expecting that in a sense.”

“I promise you” he chuckled “no scaly green skin. I bleed like you here I’ll show you.” He took a knife and went to cut his finger. “Jamie for the love of god no! it’s ok I believe you.” She actually grabbed the knife by the blade. He smiled at her. Her eyes were bugging out and her heart was racing. “you called me Jamie” he smiled at her. She looked up at him kinda flushed and afraid her blatant informality might be her undoing. “I did?” her eyes glanced a crossed his face. “yeah” he smiled at her.

“I’m… I’m sorry I uh”

“no… no don’t be. I kinda like it when you did. No one’s ever called me that. I just use James as an alias to get around when I have to give a name since my brother uses John Smith.” she dropped her head and blushed. he turned his wrist over and took her hand. “here take my pulse doc.”

“not many people call me doc I like it” she chuckled. She felt his heart rate. It seemed to be that of a normal male about his height age and built. “I’m sorry if I insulted you” she said softly. “I never would do anything to intentionally do that.”

“you didn’t Lilly. You’re smart. Its normal to question things that don’t fit in the norm. it’s what makes humans grow.”

“thank you” she looked up at him. Once again, she was getting the feeling of talking to her leather angel. “I’ll be honest I get carried away. My mind goes like 90 miles a minute. Tell me any time to shut up or change the subject or buzz off if I get too crazy.”

“I will I promise” he smiled at her.

“I admit the scientific side of me is curious as all get out but the human side is like let you be. of course, I’d never make you a lab rat and I’d never tell anyone your secret or your brother’s. like I said sometimes my curiosity outruns my manners”.

“I think that’s a scientist thing really.” He brushed hair away from her face. “I think that’s why my brother always traveled with humans. Kind of a way to reign him in.”

“so, he’s been traveling longer than you?”

“yeah. in a way” he took a deep breath.

“ok daiquiri then explains” she smiled. He smiled and took both of their glasses. He made the drinks and came back. “alright doc to curiosity”

“to curiosity” they clanked their glasses together and smiled as they looked into each other’s eyes. His were so brown they were like chestnuts. “so, you remember when the planet moved?”

“no, I don’t recall that one” she grinned. He threw a peanut at her. ‘well at that time it was my brother and his companion Donna.”

“where was Rose?”

“a whole other story” he looked at her. He explained the whole metacrisis. “aw poor Donna” she said softly. “so, the difference between you and your brother is one heart?”

“yeah and I grow old and die.”

“like me like a full human”

“yeah whereas my brother regenerates and keeps going on.”

“regenerate?”

“Yeah when a time lord gets injured or gets to old they regenerate.”

“kinda like shedding skin?”

“a little more involved than that”

“have you had to before?”

“yes, multiple times. it’s almost like he died and someone else comes in.”

“is it painful?”

“very you have to figure every cell in my body changes.”

“can I ask you something and you don’t have to answer”

“you can ask me anything doc” he smiled at her. They were sitting right next to each other oblivious to anyone else around. “would you rather regenerate or live like a human?”

“to be honest I don’t know to know that if I fall in love with someone a human that I won’t live on after they go but then to not keep experiencing things.”

“sorry this might be rude but when you regenerate do you take over someone else’s body or are you basically born an adult?”

“no doc I’m not a slitheen” he smiled at her. She was confused this was obviously one story she hadn’t heard yet. “remember downing street and nuclear codes?”

“oh yeah! I remember jack mentioning someone named jack from rexa something.”

“raxacoricofallapotorious”

“oh, that would be a bonus question for my class” she laughed. “so, when you regenerate you keep all your memories and feelings?”

“yeah my ninth incarnation first met Rose. After a while he fell in love with her. he just came out of the time war.  He was hardened and somehow she got through to him.”

“so, when you came around he still loved her?”

“yeah”

“so obviously you do too?” she unconsciously bit her lip. He looked down and swirled his drink. “I’m sorry I didn’t realize how late it was. I didn’t mean to keep you up. You must be tired.” She sat back and ran her hand down the back of her neck. She started biting her lip and twiddling her thumbs. “no” he gently put his hand on hers to stop her.

“sorry force of habit” she grinned and put her hands in her lap.

“no, I’m not tired…unless you are…I can help you I mean…”

“no, I’m usually wired for sound till well after sunrise. I think after all these years I’m part vampire” she chuckled.

“yeah I understand.”

“so, uh” things were for the first time kinda weird now. Lilly wished she never asked about Rose. “the slitheen, daleks, cybermen which ones are the worst?” now she was just grasping at straws to get back to the jovial way they were. It didn’t seem to work. “I’m sorry I uh…”

“no” he said softly

“excuse me?” she looked at him puzzled.

“no…I’m not in love with Rose anymore. She made her choice. She has to live with it.” He gulped his drink down. “James I’m sorry I got to personal I … I …”

“it’s ok love” he smiled at her. “it’s a logical question.” He put his hand over hers.

“yeah but it’s personal and you don’t owe me anything.”

“au contrare mon ami” he kissed her forehead. “I owe you another drink” he winked at her and went to the bar. She could tell an entertainer face anywhere. That was what she called it when someone was trying to be brave and be kind at the same time. _Lilly you freaking idiot! You just don’t know when to stop! Of course things are going to be insane now you stupid blond idiot. Like he’d have anything to do with you anyway. He’s gorgeous and can go back and get any girl he wants why the fuck would he be interested in you, you igit?_ “here ya go love although I think we’ve run out of bananas” they chuckled. “someone’s going to be upset tomorrow” Lilly chuckled. “so now my turn to be curious.”

“what I’ve used up my 20 questions already?” she laughed. “you have a cell phone with google. Google me and see what interesting thing I supposedly did today” she laughed. He pulled out his phone. “alright let’s see” he laughed and put on his reading glasses. “Lilliana Patrick google says now has an obsession with banana daiquiris” he laughed and looked at her through his glasses. “Norman’s spying on us” she laughed and put her hand on his forearm. He looked down at her and she looked up at him. “oh, I like the glasses! Makes you look very…”

“Nerdy? Geeky? Clever” he chuckled

“handsome” she kissed his cheek without thinking. “kinda like one of my fellow professors.”

“aw so what all do you do?”  
“what you mean beside drink like a fish?” she raised a glass “wait do fish actually drink?” they both chuckled. “well I do teach genetics and astrophysics but I’m also a neurosurgeon/chief of staff so in other words I can literally mess with your head” she laughed.

“would it freak you out if I admitted something to you?”

“what that you think my singing is for the birds? I could have told you that” she giggled.

“no!” he laughed “of course not love its beautiful.”

“Thank you and I like it when you call me love, dumpling.”

“dumpling” he laughed ‘you and your pet names.”

“oh, give me time! I’ll come up with a dozen more” she smiled at him. “it’s the southern belle in me” she batted her eyelashes and snorted a laugh which caused both to cackle like hens. “I hope you do” he winked at her. She got shy like a little girl on him. “no what I was going to say is my brother collects all kinds of books in the library on the Tardis.”

“Tardis? Oh” her eyes got big as she remembered. “your ship Jack said it’s like a retro police box”

“that’s exactly what it’s like.”

“that’s so cool” she giggled “oh go ahead sorry”

“no, no problem. Anyways a lot of the books we collect are of our interests and wellll…” he rubbed the back of his neck. “I’ve actually read some of your articles.”

“oh god I don’t know if I should be mortified or honored”

“oh no no no love believe me we wanted to meet you because you are so smart.”

“really?” she said surprised.

“uh yeah” he chuckled at her “my brother and I joked you might be part time lord because you are so smart.”

“really?” she was still surprised.

“yes, love why is that so hard to understand?”  
“I just…I just... no one’s ever said anything like that to me.”

“what is…is that bad?” he looked panicked.

“no! no! no! Jamie its ok. I’m actually honored. I’ve heard about how smart you guys are and it makes me honored you’d’ even joke I was part time lord. Obviously, I’m not but how would you even know if I was?”

“I could feel in my mind if you were.”

“Like telepathy?”

“yes”

“Is that real?”

“for a time lord it is” her eyes got big. “no…no sweet heart I’d have to ask and touch you’d have to give me permission first.”

“like just once or every time”

“every time”

“well that’s very considerate of you although I know me if I gave you permission I’d end up thinking really stupid things or horrible things. What is it like to go traipsing through someone’s mind?”

“I don’t make a habit of it and I only see what they allow me to”  
“that’s just wild. So, what did you think about my articles?”’

“oh, they were awesome! We made notes on things I… I can show you if you’d like.”

“what in the Tardis?”

“yeah or I can get them” he seemed to be getting nervous.

“how far is the Tardis away?” she lifted her foot “bum paw” she chuckled.

“oh yeah I forgot about that wait here” he got up and got a wheel chair. “at your service milady.”

“aren’t you just so sweet” she giggled.

“remind me that when I get to the Tardis” he laughed and popped a wheelie. She grabbed on and laughed. He pulled her up to the Tardis. “aw and its blue! My favorite”

“mine too” he kissed the top of her head. He opened it up and wheeled her in. then ran around to see her reaction with the cheesiest smile on his face. She looked around taking it all in. “holy canaries batman it really is bigger on the inside!” James laughed hysterically.

“that’s the best reaction in 900 years”

“you’re 900 years old”

“yes”

“damn I would have guessed 700” she laughed, he spun her around fast. “you make me throw up those daiquiris and you’ll be hearing some more interesting words” she laughed.

“let’s take care of that foot first” he took her to the med bay. She jumped up on the table. She looked at the writing. It was circles with dots and lines. “its Gallifreyan” he told her while running some diagnostics on the computer. “I thought you had to ask to read my mind”

“I do” he grinned “it’s just that’s the usual question.”

“I see thought you were trying to pull a fast one on me there Jamie” she smiled. He pushed the computer away and stood real close to her. “Lilliana” he was serious. “if I were to invade you like that it would be punishable by death.” Her eyes got big as baseballs.

“Jamie I’m sorry I was just kidding.”

“I know love” he kissed her forehead. “that’s why I told you that. Ok this foot” he examined it. “should be better in a couple hours.”

“what? It was a really bad sprain. Not sure I didn’t even do some ligament damage. And hey… it doesn’t hurt anymore.”

“ole girl here. She’s releasing endorphins.”

“she’s in my head?”

“she’s sentient”

“is that the humming?”

“yes”

“but she can’t project images correct?”

“correct”

“ok I can handle that” she chuckled “so how’s my paw?” she shook her foot.

“it was a very close call I’ll be honest but with my expert stitching it’s all attached … oh wait” he looked “ok scared me for a moment. Thought I’d have sewn it back on wrong” he played with her. She playfully threw a pillow at him. “well I’m grateful wouldn’t want to have to get a real doctor now”

“oi! Don’t get cheeky one me Madame” he put his forehead against hers. She put her hand on his face. She thought he was going to kiss her but he pulled her off the med bay. “so, let’s look at the articles now” he took her to the library. “dayam!” she looked around. “the only reason I’m saying this is because I just watched the cartoon but it reminds me of when Belle enters the library of the Beast’s mansion” she laughed.

“aww are you calling me beautiful?” he teased her.

“more like Gaston” he stuck her tongue out at him and laughed.

“I bring you too my home and you insult me twice! You’re going to give me a complex Lilly Patrick” he chuckled at her.

“ok you’re a good doctor pretty boy” she laughed at him.

“pretty? Now you’re saying I’m pretty”

“very” she kissed his forehead “and that’s a good thing.” They laughed as they sat close together.   Lilly could smell his cologne. It reeked of sexiness. Just when Lilly thought he was going to kiss her he did something else to break the spell. _Talk about getting a complex._ He got the books out and they discussed things. She could definitely see where he was coming from and when he explained why they made the notes they did it was like a lightbulb had gone off in her head. “yes, that totally makes so much more sense now! I like this brainstorming with you. You break it down for me to understand but don’t insult my intelligence.”

“Lils I’m not even breaking it down for you. Like if I were to tell Rose some of this I’d have to put it in terms she can understand and then it might still go over her head. With you I’m talking to you like I would talk to my brother.”

“really?” she smiled.

“oh yeah of course” he acted like it wasn’t that big of a deal.

“you really think I’m that smart?”

“Lilly, I think you’re one of the smartest humans I know. Remember we thought you were part time lord” he chuckled at her. “thank you Doctor I appreciate that.” She was genuine.

“since when did you call me that?”

“I just…I don’t know it felt right.” He smiled at her.

     They had a long discussion on things in physics, biology, genetics everything that interested the both of them. It was truly like talking to a colleague and an old friend. “I … I do have a serious question though.”

“ok”

“I’ve asked Jack but his moral compass seems to always point south” she laughed. “if you’re asking Jack then it has to be a big del” he chuckled.

“well have you read the one at the beginning about the guy basically saying time travel wasn’t possible and calling all of the alien invasions and things bogus and give some b.s. reason for it?”

“oh yeah” he chuckled “it put me to sleep.”

“well, and I do this for my own as well. I went back and tried to disprove/prove it.”

“good for you Lilliana good for you!” he beamed at her for her cleverness. “well if course I proved it I mean jack’s around and you guys are around. So, my question is do I have a responsibility to the scientific community to share it knowing that someone might try to do it and cause havoc or let it go?”

“what do you want to do?” he turned the table on her. She sighed. “a part of me wants to show him up for being a total dipshit and a jackass. That’s the very unused cocky side of myself which I don’t like. I’d do it just to show off and that is so not me but the analytical and possibly common-sense side says someone comes up with a machine they can save The Titanic, The Hindenburg, things like that. I know me I’d want to save everyone. That’s the girly side” she chuckled feeling a little insecure. “however, the hardened side reminds myself things have to happen for a reason. I know if I saved the titanic, if people even believed me to begin with, things that are supposed to happen won’t happen like all the lessons learned. Then the humanity in me is like if I can save one person then I’m like who would I save? If I saved a kid with no parents then how is their life any better or if I saved a mother but lost their child. What if I saved the wrong person? What if I saved the second coming of Hitler or Hitler himself or maybe not even as bad as Hitler. What if I saved the person that turned around and raped a little kid.” She started crying now. “I couldn’t live with myself if I knew all that. So” she laughed and casually wiped her face.” I think I just talked myself into keeping it to myself.”

“you know what you just did Lilliana?”

“what?” she looked up at him tenderly.

“thought like a time lord” he said softly, proudly and sweetly. “we have to do that for everything.” Her eyes got big and then the weight of what she just mentioned fell onto her. She looked up at him with concern in her eyes. “sweetheart how do you guys do it?” she hugged him without thinking. He wrapped his arms around her tightly. “just thinking about it made me feel like the weight of the world was on my shoulders and for you guys it really is.”

“you try to save as many as you can. It’s up to them what they do with themselves.” She pulled back a little “doesn’t it weigh on you?” she put her hand on his cheek in a lovingly way. “yeah quite a bit. I think that’s why we take someone with us. When we’re in analytical mode someone puts the heart into it. However it still weighs on me the things I’ve had to do and fight and have seen. I just…” Her eyes danced with his. She was so concerned for his wellbeing. She honestly forgot he’s been doing this for 900 years and is part alien so he doesn’t think totally like she does. “oh, sweetheart if you ever want to talk or need someone to talk about…” he leaned down and kissed her. He put his hands on her cheeks and pressed his lips to hers. She kissed him back. While it was a passionate kiss it also felt like he was asking her to forgive him for things he’s had to do. As if she could somehow absolve him from his past. He dropped his head onto her shoulder and pulled her closer to him. “it’s ok Jamie sweetheart. Whatever decisions you had to make in the past…its ok sweetheart. The world’s a much better place for it. Remember sweetheart every dark cloud has a silver lining.” He just laid his head on her shoulders. She felt her maternal instinct kick in. he needed someone to save him from his demons much like she did all those years ago. She ran her fingers though his hair as she held him close. She was very protective of him now. She was not going to let anyone hurt him especially himself. She kicked her shoe off and turned to face him. She looked into his eyes and she kissed his temple and brought him close to her. His head laid on her chest. She could almost feel the weight of the world on his strong muscular shoulders. She held him in silence cradling him like only a mother could a frightened child. His head was in the crook of her left arm and the right arm was around his shoulders.  Her long nails gently scratched his head running her fingers through his thick brown hair. She kissed the top of his hair and wrapped her leg along his lap pulling him closer. There was nothing at all sexual about how they were acting but it was so intimate at the same time.  “I’m here for you” she said softly and sweetly. “I won’t judge or look down on you. No one knows what you’ve been through” she said softly and sweetly. She kissed his head again and like a mother comforting her child she held him close.  She wanted so badly to tell him she loved him but it wasn’t a romantic love it was a special friendship, maternal love. She held off on that though because she didn’t want to freak him out. she just held him close and vowed to herself she’d stay there however long he needed. She closed her eyes and gently started rocking him back and forth. She kept kissing his head. When she felt him stir a little she held him closer. “it’s ok sweetheart” he wrapped his arms around her tighter. “anything you need Jamie you don’t have to carry the burden.” she felt a smile come across his face on her chest. “when I was a kid my nickname at the academy was Theta Sigma.”

“like the letters?”

“yeah”

“I like that Theta. It sounds very distinguished and Greek.”

“you can call me that if you want but just in private. I don’t know if he told Rose.”

“it will be our secret.” She kissed his head. “Jack and my friends Lucas and Jacob call me princess.” She heard him chuckle. “I’m sorry I don’t see princess. Goddess yes but you’re much more than some snobby princess.” He squeezed her a little tighter. “that’s the joke behind it when it started when I was a kid. I hated it but now it’s more of a term of endearment. I’m almost afraid when they call me by my name”

“I know Jack thinks the world of you”

“same here. Something else they call me is tiger mama” he chuckled and held on to her still. “why?”

“because they know I’d die to protect anyone I love I’d fight tooth and nail to protect one of my cubs. Have you ever seen a tiger in the wild with her babies? That’s me. I won’t let anyone hurt the ones I love even protect them from themselves.”

“I can see that” she felt his smile against her chest and he squeezed her tighter.  Then raised up and pulled out from her grasp. He looked like he was punishing himself for his moment of vulnerability. “sorry” he stood up and ran his fingers through his hair, his back to her.”

“hey it’s ok. Don’t beat yourself up for having a vulnerable moment.”

“I’m a time lord we don’t have vulnerable moments.”

“that’s BS and you know it. If you didn’t then you wouldn’t care what happens and you wouldn’t have the weight of the world on your shoulders.”

“so I don’t know about you but I’m starving. How about I make us some pancakes?”

“Yeah that sounds good” she could automatically sense the shift in his mood as he walked out of the library. “maybe I should just go back to the hotel” she told him now she was the one feeling vulnerable.  “what no pancakes?

“I don’t want to put you out. you’ve been so kind to me already.”

“its no problem. It will only take a few minutes.”

“ok if you’re sure it’s not trouble.”

“no trouble at all” he smiled big at her. She smiled back at him but could sense the distance growing. She felt like he was afraid he let too much of himself show through and now he was beating himself up. “ok” she sat down at the little table. She kept quiet not wanting to further distance him. “here ya go milady a stack of banana pancakes and here’s some syrup.”

“thank you” she smiled. They ate in silence for a few awkward moments. The only time since they have met that there’s been any awkwardness between them. “so, where are you guys going to go now?” she couldn’t take the silence anymore.

“I don’t know the Tardis always takes us where we are needed not necessarily where we want to go.”

“that sounds very interesting and also kinda like airport luggage in my case.” He chuckled at that. “I don’t know if I did or not but thank you guys for coming out to see me and for keeping me company.”

“you are definitely welcome…princess” he smirked at her. She threw a piece of a banana at him and laughed. “I have to say you do make a mean daiquiri and awesome pancakes. You’re quite the host. Me I’d burn the water.” He laughed at her. “I’d turn a pot on and then think about something completely useless and two hours later smell something funny. Believe me it’s happened” she laughed.

“well thankfully I have the Tardis to cook for me. she keeps things warm and if I forget or get distracted she finishes the meal.”

“I swear I’m going to steal her and put her in my house when I get off the road.” She laughed “it will be a lot easier than trying to remember to set the timer and listen for it” she laughed.

“so finally, something you’re not good at” he laughed and threw a piece of banana back at her. “well I could learn but it’s just me and it’s easier to order Chinese than to fool with everything. Besides by the time I get home it’s time to go again so I just eat when I can.”

“so, what is your favorite food…besides bananas.”

“honestly Mexican”

“really?” he looked surprised.

“yes, I love a good enchilada. I like spicy foods. What about you, banana boy” she laughed.

“ya know there are so many things out there. That’s one thing I like about going to different planets tasting the food.”

“what’s it like? Does it taste like human food does to us?”

“I don’t know Lilly tell me what human food tastes like” he smirked.

“touché” she chuckled. “like … like are bananas sweet on planet banana or something?”

“are they sweet to you?”

“yeah aren’t they to you?”

“no actually they’re kinda spicy.”

“really?” she looked at him. “I never would have thought of that.” He started laughing at her.

“oh, you’re so easy” he pinched her cheek.

“watch it my favorite Martian!” she punched his shoulder.

“why does everyone assume I’m from Mars? I could be from Pluto…except”

“except what?” she smiled at him.

“I don’t look like a mouse and have big ears and a high-pitched voice” he winked at her. Lilly gasped. “are you ok?”

“uh yeah…yeah sorry” she let go of the breath she was holding. “it’s so strange you mentioned that. I always pictured Pluto to be like that.” She had gotten over thinking how much he reminded her of her leather angel and then he says that. He took their dishes over to the sink. She helped wash them. “I uh… I guess I should let you get some sleep” she said softly. “I don’t want to overstay my welcome” she laughed cautiously.

“Lilly” he looked at her deep in her eyes. She could feel her heart beating and racing. “you could never outstay your welcome.” He kissed her cheek. He pulled back and they were close to each other. He held her hand “come here there’s something I want to show you.” He took her along the walkway of the Tardis. His hand felt so nice in her hand. She didn’t want to let it go. He opened a door and it lead to a garden. The roof was all glass and in the center was a giant telescope. “you have an observatory here.” She looked around like a kid in a candy store. “well that was stupid of me of course you would” she laughed. “now this…this is awesome!” she squealed like a little girl and bounced around looking up at the night sky. She didn’t see the smile as big as the Tardis on James’ face as he was watching her. “ya know Jamie I’ve been to six continents on earth, met queens, kings, sold millions of records even…even been a finalist for a Nobel prize but this” she laughed excited like an innocent child “this tops them all.” She looked at him with big tears in her eyes. “thank you” she kissed his cheek.

“sweetheart that’s not even the best part” he laughed at her. Her eyes got big like what else could be better than this. “the telescope actually works” he laughed “go on use it” she grabbed his hand and dragged him over to the giant telescope in the middle of the room. “come on come on” she laughed and he sat next to her. She put her eye through the lens. “oh my god I swear I can reach out and touch them.” He turned the telescope a little way. “now look and tell me if you see any mice with big ears” he whispered in her ear.

“no way! That’s…that’s Pluto?” she looked at him both of them giggling like school children.

“have you ever been there?”

“actually, no I haven’t. I’ve been saving it for the right time.”

“really? Like what”

“I’d know it when it happened.” He smiled at her. She wiped her eyes and bit her lip. She was contemplating telling him about her friend. “what’s wrong love?” he asked tenderly and put his hand on the back of her shoulders. “Theta can I tell you something?”

“anything sweetheart”

“I don’t know what I did in the universe to get to meet you tonight but I am so glad I did. You’ve given me my passion back and for that I say thank you. Ok and I promised myself I wouldn’t cry so let’s find another planet” she laughed and looked through the telescope. “Lilly” he said softly and held her hand. “I’ve in one form or another have been doing this for 900 plus years. The reason I do it is to see the excitement in people’s faces when they walk out onto a new planet or go back in time. With you I didn’t even have to leave planet earth. That’s what you’ve given me sweetheart and for that I thank you” he kissed her hand. She smiled at him and they enlaced their fingers together. “let see if we can find a new planet for you. Your very own planet” he looked at her. The tears she was trying not to cry as she looked into the lens piece was now failing her. He wiped the tear from her face. She leaned her head into his hand a little. The warmth gave her the strength she needed to tell him. “can I tell you something? Something I’ve never told anyone not even my two closet and dearest friends?”

“yes sweetheart”

“promise you won’t think I’m an idiot?”

“I could never think that about you Lilly” he pushed the telescope away. “what is it?” she was looking down and biting her lip. “come here” he took her hand and lead her over to the meditation garden. There was water flowing in a fountain and a swing overlooking some beautiful flowers. She took one of the pillows and held on to it. “you…you...” started but couldn’t continue. “I think I know what you’re going to tell me Lilly” he tried to help her out.

“no…there’s no way you can. God, I can’t believe after 20 years I’m telling someone.”

“why didn’t you tell someone sooner?”

“I just…I … its personal. I don’t know. It…it was just a nice memory and I wanted to keep it to myself. Everyone else had everything planned for me. they had stolen my soul and everything I just… I wanted to keep the best night of my life to myself.”

“we had fun didn’t we” he looked at her. She looked at him at first scared, confused but then looked deep into his eyes. He had a small smile on his face. “it’s…it’s me Lilliana” he said softly and pushed the hair away from her face. He swallowed hard as he tried to read the look on her face. “but…how…but” she stood up then sat back down. “no…its… it’s not possible”

“I’ve been trying my best to find a way to tell you. I didn’t want to freak you out. I’m … I’m…I’m only hoping now you believe me.” she looked at him and studied his face. The features were definitely different but the eyes different color and all the eyes told her all she needed to know. “oh my god” she gasped and put her hand over her mouth. “It’s…it’s…its really true, isn’t it?”

“yes, Lilliana it is” he puffed out his cheeks. “please don’t be mad at me”

“all night… all night I’ve been telling myself how much you remind me of him. I’ve been saying no it’s not possible it’s not but…mad? Jamie how can I be mad at you? You saved my life. All these years I wondered if you were ok. How you were what you were doing and…and…and you’re here you’re really here.” She was getting overcome with emotion. He took her in his arms and held her. “yeah sweetheart its really me. obviously, I’ve regenerated since then but I still remember that night like it was yesterday. You fell asleep on my shoulder. I laid you down on the bed. It was a roach motel and I gave you my jacket to use as a blanket. That’s how you wound up with it. I laid there and held you till he got there. You were having nightmares about someone hurting you. I kissed your head and suddenly the nightmares stopped.”

“oh my god” she just bawled. “you do remember” she held on to him for dear life.

“I told you the Tardis may not take me where I want to go but she’ll always take me where I’m needed at. That night Motley Crue was playing at a bar in town there and I was going to check them out. after the show, I went to that bar and saw this sad, scared lonely girl sitting on the edge of the bar looking like her world was falling apart. I think at that time we both needed each other. I just came out of the time war. I was so raw and hardened and you gave me a small piece of hope back you gave me the will to go on after I lost everything. Believe me Lilliana if I could have I would have had you go with me but I knew you were destined for bigger things. I had to let you grow and spread your wings. Little did I know that years later you’d be the one rescuing me” he kissed her head.

“how am I rescuing you?”

“you’ve given me my spark and my passion back. My brother he has Rose he needs her. She needs him. You’re partly why Rose is even here”

“me how?”

“because when I asked her to go with me originally she said no. she was 19 still had her mom and things. I took off. I was gone for a while even went back and replayed our night. I saw a little of you in Rose so against my own better judgement and something I never do I went back to about 10 seconds after I left her and asked her again. That time she said yes. Who would have thought her saying yes would lead to me meeting you again? She was what I needed at the time. She is what he needs now and you’re what I need now. there were times when she’d do things and I’d swear I thought it was you. There are things you do I see in her. I’ll be honest I was afraid to tell you because I thought you’d want him back. I can’t go back to him he’s gone. I didn’t think I’d be your type I’m still not sure” he chuckled and got nervous. “but I’d like to have a chance to try being I only have one life and all.” She looked up at him red, tear streaked eyes. “she had to tell you no Theta so I can say yes” she smiled. He grabbed her and kissed her. His heart was pounding in her chest and hers in his. She could feel the tears running down his face especially when they intertwined with hers. He held her close to him on that swing in the garden under the stars. He was not going to let her go again.

            They sat there for a long time holding each other and remembering the night they had all those years ago. It had gotten daylight before either one had noticed. Lilly knew she had to get back to the hotel but she didn’t want to leave James. She was afraid it would be another twenty years if she ever got to see him again. “Lilly, I understand if you can’t but would you want to go out with us on some of our adventures?” Lilly’s heart sank. She wanted to so badly. She wanted to and not because she was curious about other planets but because she wanted to be with James. However, she had responsibilities. She wasn’t like rose was when she started she had multiple careers and people depending on her. She wanted to but she needed to get things in order first. She hoped he’d understand. “Jamie, I would love nothing more but I have to ask for a favor”

“ok”

“is there any way you can ask me or come and get me after the first of the year? I have to get things squared away.”

“Lilly it’s a time machine. You can leave now be gone an entire year and come back five minutes after you left.”

“I know but for my own piece of mind there are things I need to do. Things I need to settle before I do anything. If you can’t or don’t want to I completely understand. There are people that depend on me and I have to let them know I won’t be around for a while.”

“I understand” he said softly.

“I just want to be able to enjoy whatever we do without having to worry about them.”

“I understand you have responsibilities.” He eased up on holding her. Lilly felt a little let down. She hated that she had the responsibility gene and couldn’t just leave but in her heart, she knew it was the right decision. He told her he’d be back and if she wanted to go she was more than welcome to go. Lilly smiled as she left the Tardis, her foot now feeling better her heart not so much. He walked her to her room kissed her good night. Lilly feared that was the last time she’d ever see him again.


	9. Lions Den

Chapter 9 – Lions Den

 

            Lilly bit her lip and paced back and forth. “Jack, you know them better than anyone. Did I do the right thing?”

“Lilly, you did what’s right for you. The doctor knows that.”  
“but… Jack”

“listen you told him after the new year. He’ll show up.”

“what if between now and then he changes his mind? You know he doesn’t go back.”

“Lilly, you are forgetting. It’s a time machine! He can jump forward or backwards. You might already be on your first adventure.”

“or back to work. Damnit Jack don’t ever get responsible. It’s so overrated.”

“hey, remember that text I sent you?”

“which one?”

I’ll dance at your wedding”

“Jack, you know the…” she seemed to be picking up what he was throwing down. “will you really?”

“Lilly, you know I can’t’ tell you that”

“Jackson Harkness, I swear you better not be setting me up for a fall” she heard giggling in the background. “who’s that?”

“oh, just some friends”

“I’m sorry to have bothered you”

“Lils you are no bother”

“thank you”

“so, are you going to aunt Sophia’s wedding on the 31st?”

“I would rather be buried up to my neck in sand, have honey poured on my head and pour fire ants on top followed by a group of tarantulas than to see Sophia and Renee again but “she sighed “he asked me to come so how can I say no”

“I know”

“please tell me you are going? I really want to make it till my 21st anniversary and with them two I might not be able to.”

“yeah I’ll be there”

“thank god” she sighed “I truly don’t know if I’ll be able to stay the whole weekend. I am literally breaking out in hives panicking.”

“Lilly don’t do that”

“I wish I could teleport wherever you re because I need one of your hugs. I am that freaked out.”

“Lilly you’ll be ok. You have uncle Myles there and me. we can help keep you and the evil ones separated. Besides if I can get him to go I think you’ll like my plus one. He’s a great guy.”

“Jack, you know I’m not shopping around.”

“Well that leaves more for me then”

“You are so wrong” she laughed

“yeah but that’s why you love me”

“that’s true” she laughed “thanks for talking me off the ledge”

“hope you feel better and Lils.”

“yeah”

“trust in The Doctor”

“I will.”

            Jack hung up the phone. “She’s got it bad” he laughed at Rose. “I tell you though he had better come through.”

“Jack you know he will. He’s just as bad as she is” Rose laughed.

“oh, I remember not too long ago a certain blond that was just as bad” he chuckled at her. “shut up” Rose laughed “so what’s the deal with this Sophia and Renee?”

“oh” Jack groaned “she’s Lilly’s Madame de Pompadour”

“oh”

“yeah she literally thinks she is in the bloodline of a king from France even though they don’t have monarchy anymore and haven’t for years. Her and Lilly have never gotten along. She is everything Lilly despises. Arrogant, rude, obnoxious and if its Lilly’s then she has to have it. That’s partly why I want you and the Doctor to go with me. When Renee sees Lilly and her Doctor well she’ll be putting her claws out. I don’t know if Lilly will retract or go in for the kill. Maybe the two of you can help her keep her cool. And I want to see her face when she sees him again.”

“Yeah I’ll tell him”

“thanks Rosie”

            Rose made her way back to the Tardis. She saw James at the control panel. “so” she blew out her cheeks “you are going to come back for her aren’t you?” he looked at her. “oh, come on doctor! She’s crazy about you! It’s not easy to give up your life and live on the Tardis”

“you did”

“that’s because I had no future. Lilly’s got what five careers? She’s responsible for a lot of people. You know how it was when you thought it was 12 hours. She doesn’t want people worrying about her. Besides she’s crazy about you!” James tried to not smile. “she literally called jack panicking that she did the right thing. I could hear it in her voice. Come on I know you don’t do second trips. That was the past you. This you is different.  Besides you came back for me. that worked out fantastic. Besides it will be nice having another girl on board. “

“you know she’s not a girly girl.”

“doesn’t matter there are things all girls talk about” she chuckled and gave a flirty grin. “and besides I know you like it that she’s making you wait.”

“how do you know that?”

“it’s the thrill of the chase” she laughed.

“I’m a time lord we don’t chase”

“you’re also half human male. Regardless of species men chase. It’s like the pretty birds they’re male so the females will notice. Besides” she sighed “sounds like she’s got to go to this party and is freaking out. jack wants all of us to come.”

“Rose you know I don’t do domestic.”

“believe me doctor from the sound of it she’ll need you to be there”

“why?”

“her cousin is like reinette.”

“oh, you’re still going on about that?

“no, I forgave you but if she treats Lilly the way Jack says she does then Lilly’s going to need her friends especially you.” Just then the phone rang it was jack.

“hey what’s going on?”

“hey man listen I know you don’t do the domestic thing but your girlfriend has to go to his party.”

“Yeah Rose was telling me”

“Lilly is going to need you”

“why what’s going on?’

“her aunt Sophia is getting married. Her cousin Renee is Sophia’s daughter. The two of them well let’s just say the daleks and cyberman would treat Lilly better than the two of them.”

“really?”

“yeah they’re that evil. I need you to come so we can keep Lilly from getting really hurt. She’s scared and nervous about it and I’m afraid if she doesn’t have support then she’ll fall apart.”

“ok I’ll go but don’t tell her I want to be a surprise.”

“thanks doc oh and you might want to call her”

“why?”

“tomorrow’s Christmas and it’s her birthday. Her 40th at that and for women that’s a big deal.”

“ok I will” he hung up the phone. “ok change of plans. We’re going to new, new earth”

“what? Why?”

“because tomorrows Christmas and Lilly’s birthday. I have no idea what to get her.”

“you don’t have to get her anything just surprise her.”

“I only know she likes tiger lilies. Her uncle used to pick those for her but on earth they only grow in the summertime.” The wheels in his head started spinning.

“I’m telling you, you can’t go wrong with a surprise appearance.”

“yeah but I don’t want her thinking I’m coming back for her just yet.”

“we know she likes blue, motorcycles., Elvis, heavy metal music, science sports”

“yeah but those are things I can give her on the Tardis it’s got to be something special. the

“the most special thing you ever gave me was s key to the Tardis?”  
“maybe I’ll think of something when we get there.”

            As they walked around new earth, Dr. Blue couldn’t find anything that appealed to him. Then he thought of something Jack told him. She’s proud of her Irish heritage and she likes teddy bears. He got her a bear and on the bear, was a green shirt. The lady at the shop told him he could put whatever he wanted on the shirt. He chose something he knew Lilly would understand. He wrote out the Greek letter for I a shamrock and then the letters for his childhood nickname Theta Sigma. Then he bought her a pair of emerald earrings in the shape of a clover. He also knew about her faith so they went and got a silver Celtic cross with a blue zirconia birthstone in it. He also knew how much she loved her hometown sports team so the Tardis managed to get some blue wrapping paper with her team logo and white ribbon. It took him longer to wrap than to buy because The Doctor wasn’t one to wrap gifts.

            Dr. Brown had promised Rose a day at the beach for Christmas. So Dr. Blue dropped them off then he found out where Lilly was staying. He had to smile at his Barcelona. She had a show to do on the 27th so it was easier to stay than fly around. He found Lilly’s’ hotel and found her room. He let himself in and was grateful she was asleep. He set the presents on her bed then went to leave however his heart, his silly human heart wouldn’t let him. With his brother and Rose off he’d be alone. He didn’t mind but he was here. The tv was on and he saw Lilly sleeping on the bed. She was actually holding a pillow. He brushed the hair away from her face and saw her tear stained cheeks. His heart broke. He had no idea why she had been crying but whatever it was he wanted, vowed, to make it end. He never wanted to see her cry again unless they were tears of joy and laughter. Rose was right. He had been trying to hide and fight it but he had it bad. “my queen everything will be ok” he kissed her temple and whispered in her ear. She stirred in her sleep but he tucked her in. he saw there and watched her sleep. He wanted to see what made her cry but she needed her privacy. She stirred in her sleep having a bad dream. He laid down next to her and held her close to him. “it’s ok Lilly it’s just a dream” he whispered.

“Theta” he heard her whisper. He looked but she was asleep. “yes, princess I’m here” he kissed her head. She turned over in her sleep and he took the pillow from her. He wrapped his arms around her and she held on to him tightly. Before he knew it, he dozed off.

            A couple hours later something on the tv woke him up. She was still asleep. He wanted to be there when she woke up but he remembered Roses’ comment about the chase. He got out of bed, tucked her in and left her a note. He put his gifts next to her on the bed and made his way back to the Tardis. He went to the beach his brother was at and fell asleep in the sand.

            When Lilly woke up she remembered crying because she hadn’t heard from James in about a month. Today was her birthday and she was spending it alone in Barcelona, Spain. She wished she had a time machine just so she could go back and tell him yes she’d go anywhere with him. Her head hurt but she actually felt like she had a good night sleep. She dreamed about James. She dreamed he was laying next to her making her monsters go away. That made her happy but also sad because she wanted it to be real. She loved how he’d always made her feel safe. Lucas tried but more times than not she was the one helping him out. Lilly noticed how she felt tucked in. she got the sleet out of her eyes and turned around on her side. She was startled to see presents there. She was kind of freaked out that someone had been in her room. Then she saw the flower. It was her favorite. It was an orange tiger lily. Her uncle used to pick them for her when she was a kid they only grow in the summertime. The only person she ever told that to was James.  She got the letter that was left.

_Merry Christmas and happy birthday!_

_I will always come back for you love. You better be ready. You never know when I’ll pop up. I hope you decide to join me in the new year. I believe it will be a fantastic year!_

_Love always, your favorite Martian._

Lilly squealed and jumped up and down on the bed like a little kid. “he was here! He was here!” she read the letter at least ten times. Then she saw the presents he gave her. She held on to the bear for dear life. “oh, my Theta I do love you!” she put the earrings on and the bracelet she was over the moon. This was the best birthday/Christmas she ever had. She went to call him then realized she didn’t have his number. She texted jack. “please give me his number.” Then she took a selfie with the bear, flower, earrings and bracelet. When Jack sent her the number she sent him the selfie. “thanks for making my dreams come true!” she went about her day.

            Christmas was nice on the Tardis. Dr. Blue finally got Lilly’s number. He loved the picture and made it his wallpaper. He told her he’d see her soon and he couldn’t wait. The Doctor and Rose teased him about how much he liked Lilly but he didn’t care. He was excited to see her again so they jumped ahead to December 30th.

            The Doctors and Rose met Jack at Torchwood. He was happy to see his friends. “I do want to warn you. Sophia and Renee are a couple of uptight bitches. They think they are better than everyone else. So, I just wanted to warn you. This weekend will not be a piece of cake.”

“is Lilly there yet?”

“no, she said she’d text me when she got to Cardiff. Uncle Myles wants me there to help so we’ve got to go.” They rode with Jack to this sprawling mansion in the countryside. They were greeted by the butler Louis and escorted to the living room where they met Uncle Myles. He was an older grandpa type man. He was down to earth and sweet. Then they met Renee and Sophia. They were just as Jack explained. They looked over The Doctors. “Trainers with a suit?” Sophia shook her head. Renee looked Rose up and down. “That sweater just doesn’t go with that outfit. Jack are these your friends?”

“yes, they are my best friends.”

“well no accounting for taste. Seems like your time in America has done you more harm than good” Rose was about to say something when Jack stopped her. They sat down and had a cup of tea. Renee and Sophia made a generic small talk. Then to the mercy of everyone else had an appointment to get to. Jack got the text that Lilly was on her way. James couldn’t help but get a smile on his face.

            Lilly was on her Harley thinking of 100 separate ways to get out of this when she pulled up to the door. She rang the doorbell. Louis answered the door. “Dr. Patrick! It’s good to see you!” Louis was the consummate professional. “Louis!” Lilly hugged him

“how are you?”

“I’m fine Dr. Patrick and you?”

“Ugg I’d be better if you called me Lilly.”

“Dr. Patrick you know I can’t do that.”

“I know but I can try” she smiled.

“shall I park your motorcycle?”

“oh if you tell me where I can”

“Nonsense Peter the valet can park it.”

“ok but please make sure he brings my helmet back.”

“of course, Dr. Patrick”

“I can also take my things to my room.”

“Nonsense Miss Amelia can take care of that”

“well I tried is Jack here?”

“yes, him and his guests are in the living room. Thanks” she started into the living room. She didn’t get to see who was there. She heard a scream and a crash. She ran past the living room into the dining room. The living room occupants were behind her. She saw a lady on the floor. She was screaming and crying obviously in pain. All of a sudden Dr. Patrick kicked in. She ran over to the lady not much younger than her. “Hello sweetheart I’m a doctor. Can you sit up for me?” The lady was in immense pain but she sat up. “Can you tell me your name?’

“my…my...my name is Jackie”

“hi Jackie, I’m Lilly. I’m here to help you. Can you tell me what happened?” Lilly felt around on her shoulder. It was disjointed. “I was mopping up a spill and slipped and hurt my shoulder and my ankle.”

“ok I need someone to get me some water and a washcloth.” No one moved they were in shock. “NOW!” Lilly barked. “ok sweetheart we’re going to get you better but you have to trust me.”

“ok” they brought the washcloth over and wiped her face. Lilly stood beside Jackie on the floor. She still didn’t know she had an audience behind her. After Jackie took a drink of water and put the glass down Lilly talked to her. ‘Ok look at me” she did “ok Jackie do you have any kids?” Jackie started talking about her kids. Lilly kept her talking then snap! She put her shoulder back in socket. “You bloody idiot! You could have told me you were going to do that!”

“trust me you were relaxed it hurt less. Now did you hit your head?”

“I don’t know”

“ok let’s test it out” she checked no concussion. In her leather jacket she kept a stethoscope. She checked her breathing and heart it was fine. Then she checked her ankle. “no broken bones just sprained. “Arthur, I have my medical bag. Its black with blue sequins please bring it to me” Arthur ran to get it. “ok in my bag I have pain medicine. Are you allergic to anything?”

“no”

“ok good I’ll give you a shot for the pain. I’ll have to get a friend to prescribe more.” Arthur brought her bag down. She got out an ace bandage and wrapped her shoulder. “do you have another bandage?” Arthur got her one and she wrapped her foot. “ok now doctor’s orders you are to stay off that foot for at least three days and be gingerly with that shoulder. Do you have a room here?”

“what’s going on here?” Lilly’s blood ran cold she heard Renee’s voice. Arthur explained what happened. “Of course! The biggest event of the season and now because she’s inept we’re going to be short staffed. You have on hour to get well or else you will be looking for a new job in the new year.” At that point Lilly turned around. “Excuse me of the people in this room who has a Harvard medical degree?” Renee looked at her “oh that’s right it would be me. She is MY patient and she will not be forced to duty before she is fully healed and you can damn well be sure I won’t let that happen. When your degree arrives in the mail then you can do as you please. Now if you’ll excuse me the doctor is in!” She was cold and determined. No one was going to take control over her when she was tending to a patient. She turned to the staff. “I mean it! Anyone tried to get her to work before I release her will be dealing with me and trust me you don’t want to mess with me now!” she turned to Jackie “ok we need to get you comfortable. There’s a room in there we’ll move you too. Don’t put any weight on your foot or shoulder but can you get up?” she tried but there was no getting up. “ok tell you what” she straddled over her. “wrap your arms around me and we’ll get you up.” She did and on three Lilly pulled her up. They hobbled over to the couch. Lilly propped her foot up and got it situated. She called Martha and she filled the prescription. She made sure Jackie was ok then went back to get her bag she hadn’t calmed down from as her friends called it doctor mode. She was in full on take charge mode. This might have been what she needed to get through this weekend. She wasn’t in the mood to be pushed around. She gave orders to the staff and ran upstairs to put her bag back. When she came downstairs she was greeted by Sophia. “So, I heard about you playing hero.”

“stories of my heroism are greatly exaggerated.” Lilly snarled and leaned against the wall and folded her arms. she was in defense mode. “well also heard you threatened my staff”

“I just explained the situation.”

“need I remind you, you are a guest?”

“need I remind you this is my house?”

“what?”

“oh yeah this beauty” she spun around like Julie Andrews in _Sound Of Music._ “Is my house. Yeah when I was in college I literally built it with these hands.” She waggled her fingers. “the only reason and I do mean ONLY reason you are here is because of Uncle Myles. So let me tell you sunshine” she said feistily and got up in her face. “if I tell the staff to leave someone alone they had damn well better leave her alone!” She spun on her heel and turned towards the living room. “Jack!” Lilly said excitedly and gave him a hug. She was calming down now that she saw her friend. “damn Lils I’ve never seen you in doctor mode but Jacob and Lucas are right it’s hot!” he laughed. She slapped him on the head. “thanks Jack” she laughed and turned around. She saw The Doctor first. “oh my god!” she got excited and gave him a hug. “good job doctor!” he whispered in her hear. “thank you” she said shyly. “Rose! Hello” she gave her a hug.

“I’m so glad you told her off” she whispered in her ear.

“Keep your eye on The Doctor. Renee will be on the warpath and she’ll go after him especially since she’s been told off.”

“oh, I will” Rose whispered in her ear. Lilly looked at the couch where they had been to see if James was there. She didn’t see him and got upset. She forced as smile as she let Rose go. As if Rose read her mind she looked over her shoulder. “Um do I get one of those?” Lilly’s eyes got big as she spun around. He was here! Her heart skipped a beat. “Jamie!” Lilly gave him a huge hug. She held on for dear life. “I told you. The Tardis takes me where I’m needed.”  He whispered in her ear “and this time where I wanted to go. Told you I’d come back for you.” He held her tight. “god I’ve missed you” she whispered back. He let her go and the only seats left were separate couches. “Jamie you can sit here” Renee patted the seat next to her. James went to then Jack helped them out. “You know what JAMES” he made sure to emphasize on James not the informal “you sit here next to Lilly.” Jack went and sat next to Renee. James smiled at him and sat next to his girl and held her hand.  Lilly smiled big as Renee squirmed in her seat.

            For the next forty-five minutes, they sat there making awkward small talk. “I’m going to check on my patient.”

“oh, I’ll come with you love” James went to get up.   

“I’m sure if she’s as good as she says she can handle it herself.” Sophia made a snide remark. Lilly grabbed his hand. “I am that good.” She smirked. She was not going to let anyone get to her. Not now not sense her friends were here. She pulled him along when they were out of earshot Lilly got him to the side. “I’m so glad you’re here!” she smiled.

“where else would I be?” he smiled at her and gave her a huge hug. “what’s going on? With the two of them?”  
“Renee will now do anything to get under my skin since she saw us together. She’ll also recruit her mother in as well. So just don’t fall into their trap.”

“looks like it’s working” he smiled at her.

“to say I don’t like her would be to kind. She will try anything to split us up. I just wanted to warn you like the whole BS with sitting next to her. Calling you Jamie to get at my goat.”

“Lils she’s not going to get me. I promise.” he kissed her head. “trust me Rose and my brother would have my head.” He kissed her head.

“I know but she’s like a cancer. She plays on my insecurities. I just want to apologize if I get a little catty and act like I don’t normally do. She’ll go after you and then will join Sophia in insulting you, Jack, Rose and your brother. She knows you guys are important to me. so, to get to me she uses you guys.”

“yeah they already started on the shoes with the suit.” Lilly bit her lip. She was getting angry. “remember when I told you they call me tiger mama? Welllll I pray to god I don’t have to go that far because it won’t be pretty.”

“Jack’s right it is really hot when you’re in doctor mode” he giggled at her. She playfully punched him and grinned. “there I got a smile” he kissed her head.

“thank you, Theta,” she wrapped her arms around him. “you are welcome my tiger Lilly. We better go check on the patient” he took her hand and lead her over.

“hi Jackie, how do you feel?”

“I’m ok”

“do you need anything?”

“no”

“Ok here’s my number call or text me if you need anything to talk, need medicine, if you want to talk about how cute this one is” she pointed her thumb back to James. That got Jackie a laugh. “believe me I don’t mind that” she laughed and winked.

“thanks, I’m good.”

“ok I’ll check on you later” she took James hand and they walked back towards the living room. “back to the lion’s den” Lilly breathed out a breath she didn’t know she was holding. “you’ll be ok my little tiger” he kissed her cheek. They walked back in and there were more people there Renee got her way. James sat next to her and Lilly had to sit elsewhere. She watched as Renee tried to flirt with James. She kept calling him Jamie. Finally, he told her Lilly’s the only one that gets to call him that. He winked at her Lilly felt a small victory.


	10. Chapter 10 – Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this chapter the doctors and rose learn about lilly's childhood and it wasnt as great as people thought.

Chapter 10 – Revelations

 

            Finally, it was dinner time. Renee asked James to escort her to dinner even grabbed on to his arm. “I don’t mind but there’s something I have to do first.” Renee looked at him incredulously. How dare someone not put her first. James came over to Lilly, “my queen would you allow me to escort you to dinner?” and offered his other arm. Lilly looked up at him and smiled like a Cheshire cat. “Why yes my handsome love I’d be honored” she got up and took his arm. Renee huffed and let go of his other arm and marched on. Lilly held him back till they were alone then she threw him up against the wall and about kissed his lips off. “Blimey uh what was that for?” he chuckled.

“Because I love you my lordship” she winked and took his hand.

“Did I ever tell you how cute you are when you’re jealous?” he giggled.

“I’m not jealous! Just alert” she entwined their fingers. They made it to the dining room and of course Renee and Sophia had it figured out. Lilly would be on the far side of the table, James on the complete opposite. Then as if trying to add insult to injury she puts Rose far away from The Doctor and Jack. So, Rose is stuck sitting next to a bunch of people she doesn’t know and its upsetting Lilly. “Ya know Rose I think they got their…”

“Before dinner I’d like to make a toast” Sophia started giving Lilly a glare. “Bloody fucking hairy cow” Lilly said under her breath in Russian. She didn’t think anyone could hear her much less understand her however The Doctor chuckled and hit her leg. “Did you hear that?” she asked him. “Yes” he took a drink.

“And you understood?”

“I know 5 billion languages and I have time lord hearing.”

“I’m so screwed” she laughed. As they clicked glasses Lilly had no idea what the toast was about. She whispered to The Doctor. “Can you and your brother send each other telepathic messages without touching?” still in Russian.

“Yes”

“Good” she chuckled “shall we have some fun at his expense?”

“Lilly are you being mischievous?” he tried to not snicker.

“Nope I’m a good girl” she took a bit of food.

“I just told him you see him trying to grab her leg under the table and that’s what we’re giggling at.”

“That explains the freaked out look on his face.”

            Lilly and The Doctor continued the same way through the rest of dinner. When it was over Lilly went up to James. “So, I’ve heard you’ve been getting frisky at the dinner table?” she tried to keep a straight face. “Yeah well it’s payback for flirting with my brother.” Lilly busted out laughing she brushed the hair away from her face. “I’m such a lousy liar” she cracked up.

“I know” he winked and kissed her nose. “You speak Russian?” he asked her in that language.

“yes, as well as Italian, Spanish, French, German, and Portuguese”.

“I learned all those when I was still in the loom” he smirked.

“shut up or I’ll put you back in the loom” she teased him.

“only if you join me” he responded and pinched her blushing cheek. “Next time love you want to play tricks on me, make sure you’re not part of the joke” he kissed her. “You really don’t want to know what images my brother really sent me.” He kissed her head and walked away. “Can’t be any better than the real image I have now” she laughed.

“oh, you’d be surprised” he turned and winked. Lilly found Rose after dinner.

“I’m sorry. I tried to get her to let us switch placed but she’s got to be a bitch. My aunt is pissed and vindictive. She’ll try to get me and you to fight over The Doctor because Renee’s charms aren’t working on boy genius. I don’t know you except for what Jack has to say but please let’s not let her win.”

“then you stop flirting with him” Lilly looked shocked.

“flirting? Please”

“I saw you two at dinner whispering things and laughing.”

“that?” Lilly laughed “oh Rose that was innocent.”

“didn’t look innocent” she was getting huffy and jealous.

“look he heard me call Sophia a few choice words in Russian under my breath. He called me on it then I found out his telepathy with his brother works distantly so we were playing tricks on Jamie. I told him to tell Jamie I could see him playing footsies and things under the table just to get a rise out of him that’s all. We were laughing at the looks on his face. Although I think now he was sending him risqué ideas just to toy with me. Believe me Rose Jamie’s my pick. Too bad we don’t have telepathy together we could really do some number on boy genius and boy wonder” she laughed. Rose seemed to ease up when she looked at Lilly and realized she was telling the truth. “you really love him, don’t you?” she smiled

“oh yeah” Lilly lit up like a Christmas tree. “somehow when he’s around it’s like my world stops. There’s no monsters in my head and I’m like a teenage girl. Well the way teenage girls are supposed to feel. I never had that luxury.”

“why what happened?”  
“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to let that out”

“it’s ok”

“it’s just…I haven’t even told Jamie. Being here it honestly is starting to make me nervous”

“why?”  
“because there’s too many of my d…Satan’s people here. It’s only a matter of time before he shows up. Jack told me he said he wasn’t coming but I can feel it Rose. I can feel the terror coming on.” She bit her lip and tried not to cry.

“Lilly what’s wrong?”

“I have to leave” she started panicking. She started to walk away. Rose grabbed her arm and stopped her. “Are you ok?”

“no” Lilly shook her head. She could feel a massive one coming on. She started ringing her hands and walking back and forth and then grabbing on to her hair. “Lilly take a deep breath.” By now Lilly was shaking. She was breaking out in a cold sweat. Her blue eyes were big. She was finding it hard to breathe. Rose went and got The Doctor. “what is it Lilly?”

“panic…” gasps “pa...” gasps “attack”

“ok sit down” he came up to her and put his hand on her elbow. She looked at him her face white as a sheet. “no…need cold…air” they walked her to the back porch.

“here sit down and take a deep breath.”

“can’t…breathe”

“yes…yes you can sweetheart yes you can.”

“I’m…so…scared” her eyes welled up with tears.

“it’s ok…here” he put her hand on his chest. “focus your mind. Focus on my hearts beating.” It felt so weird. They actually did beat after each other. “focus on me Lilly” she looked in his eyes. “remember when this happened before? Old leather git? I told you it would be ok and it will be.” she started crying. “not this time Doctor not this time” her hand trembled. “he’s coming here I can feel it.”

“who?... who’s coming here” she didn’t answer at first. “Lilly who’s coming here? Who’s causing you to feel like this?”

“Satan”

“Lilly Satan’s…oh you mean…” she didn’t tell him any details about what exactly Satan did but he but he knew that meant her father. “that’s why I’m scared! What if he hurts me again? I can’t go through that again Doctor I can’t. I’ve come so far I can’t go back to being that little girl again.”

“Lilly, you remember what happened last time? Remember what I told you?”

“yeah” she smiled.

“now there’s two of me and believe me neither one of us will let him near you.”

“promise?” she looked up at him with scared blue eyes.

“I promise” he told her confidently. For some reason when he was like that, any version of him, it gave her strength. She believed him. He kissed her head. “thank you” she hugged him tight. “can I talk to you alone?” she whispered in his ear.

“yes sweetheart” he turned to Rose. “Rose, would you care to get a glass of water and a wet washcloth?” Rose took the hint and left.

“Theta…Jamie told me you guys can see my memories if I allow it.”

“yeah”

“I’m terrified of how he’ll react when he finds out what I have done.”

“what did you do?”

“can we go to the stables? I feel safer there.”

“yes of course” he took her hand and they walked to the stables. “Here get on here” he pointed to a pile of hay. she sat down and took a deep breath. “I’ve…no…no one knows what’s happened to me. If you get mad or don’t think I’m good enough for your brother I understand.”

“Lilly sweetheart what is it?”

“does it hurt?”

“what?”

“to read my mind”

“no…it just feels weird. You…you don’t have to do this.”

“I…I...I…think I have to. If I am ever going to get closure and…I don’t think I could ever actually speak what happened to me to anyone.”

“alright sweetheart whatever you don’t want me to see imagine a door and I won’t go through. Look at me” she sheepishly looked at him. She was scared not just because she knew what was coming but because she was afraid of what he would think of her. He put his fingers on her temples and they closed their eyes.  “aw is that you? You were such a cute baby” she could hear almost a smile on his face. “aww there you are at two and …” he got quiet. He went through all of Lilly’s childhood. The tears ran down her face as she had to relive days she didn’t want to. “that…that…” she could feel him getting upset. She could feel the anger in his fingers as they were pressing harder on her temples.  Then they went to her teenage years. Her tears got stronger and she could hear The Doctor sniffling as she even opened her eyes and saw tears down his cheeks. She felt so bad that he had to experience this is with her. Then she saw his brows furrow and could see the rage build on his face. His rage started to scare her. He was even saying things in a language she never heard. He felt her fear of him. “I’m not mad at you sweetheart. Please don’t think that.” She calmed down. The pressure on her temples eased up when he said that. She took him on up to the night they met. She showed him how he made a difference in her world. He was honestly moved. Then she stopped. When she looked into his eyes they were cold. They were filled with so much anger and hate she was scared. She started backing up against the wall afraid he was going to take his anger out on her. She had never seen him like this. “Please don’t look at me like that” she said scared and pulled her knees up to her chest. She was cowering in the corner afraid. She had never seen her hero like this. “He better hope he doesn’t show his face here!” he was walking back and forth so mad the horses were sensing it and getting upset. “I’m sorry! I shouldn’t have!”

“oh no! no! no! sweetheart! I’m not mad at you not at all!”

“you’re not?” she looked up at him timidly.

“oh, Lilly no love none of that was your fault! Come here!” he held his hand out. she was too scared to take it. “come on love I’d never hurt you.” She took it timidly and he wrapped his arms around her and she let loose forty years of fear, hurt and pain. “it’s alright sweetheart” he held her close.

            Rose and James made it out to the stables. “What’s going on?” The Doctor looked at Rose and James. They knew something was up. “Can I show them or do you want this to stay between us?”

“Will he hate me?”

“Sweetheart I don’t think there’s anything you can do to make him hate you.”

“You sure?” she was still scared.

“Trust me” he put his hand on her cheek. She smiled timidly.

“Then show them. I can’t do that again.”

“Ok sweetheart. You two come here.”

“Doctor what’s going on?”

“I need to show you two something. She needs you!” he told James.

“what? What’s going on? What’s wrong with her?” James asked worried. He reached out his hand and showed Rose first. She had to run away and Lilly heard her retching outside the barn. He grabbed James hand and pulled him over to Lilly. “Here love here’s The Doctor you really need.” James took his spot on the hay. He pulled Lilly over to him. She clung to him in fear, remorse, nerves, every possible human emotion. The Doctor then touched his brother’s head.  Lilly heard him say things once again in a different language. She felt the anger and hatred seeping through his body. After a couple of seconds, he wrapped her up like a baby in his arms. he was crying just like Lilly. “See love I told you he wouldn’t hate you.” Jamie cuddled her close and rocked her back and forth. He was speaking in that tongue again and Lilly didn’t know it but it was just the two of them now. “My precious queen” James whispered in her ear. “As long as there’s breath in my body he’ll never touch you again.”

“I love you Theta” she just fell apart. What remaining strength she had turned loose. She finally felt safe.

            Lilly opened her eyes. She could barely see they were so swollen she wasn’t sure where she was but she felt safe she turned around and James was asleep next to her he had been wearing a black trench coat when he came out to the stables. It was now draped over them. It covered her more than him and she knew he was cold. she found a blanket in a sleigh and covered the both of them up. She laid her head back on his chest and fell back asleep.

            When James woke up Lilly was snuggled up next to him. He noticed the blanket on them and bundled her in the covers. He sat there and watched her sleep. He ran his fingers through her hair brushing her bangs away. He saw her swollen eyes and had to fight back the anger he had also mixed in with his own tears. “oh love how could he do that to you? I’m sorry you thought I’d be mad at you. you were a victim. Poor thing you probably thought it was always your fault. god my queen I’m so sorry” he pulled her closer to him and kissed her head. She stirred in her sleep. “I’m sorry” he whispered. “Jamie?” she said softly.

“yes love I’m here”

“thank you” she kissed his chest

“for what?

“for everything

“you’re welcome love” he kissed her head. “we should probably get a shower before breakfast. I’m sure there will be more judgement passed today.”

“if either of those heifers say anything today I swear to god I’ll need bail money. They want to fight I’m in the mood for them to bring it on.”

“Lilly love you don’t want to do that”

“no I saw the BS they pulled yesterday. I was a good girl yesterday today not so much.” She was getting feisty. “aw my feisty little tiger” he kissed her cheek.

“that’s not fair” she laughed. “I want to be in a mood and you’re ruining it.” She giggled. “you know how to calm me right down but the two of you scared me to death last night I thought he was going to kill me.”

“why?”

“after he saw my memoires he got so cold and had an evil look in his eyes. You did too but he told me neither one of you would be mad at me.”

“yeah I knew something was up, I could feel his anger. So when Rose got me I knew it had to be bad. I’m sorry love I didn’t mean to scare you. You just saw the fury of the time lord. The daleks called it the oncoming storm.”

“well I feel sorry for whoever its directed at that’s for sure.”

“we’re usually really, really calm unless it comes to someone we love getting hurt then its all bets are off”

“I remember your previous you getting upset but nothing like that.”

“believe me Lilly if my old self knew then there would be no way of stopping him from killing him. Honestly if I saw him I don’t know what I would do.”

“he’s out of my life however I’m mortified he’ll be here. So if you see me spazzing out get me away. I don’t want to have another nervous breakdown.”

“I will between he three of us we’ll keep you safe”

“thanks” she kissed him. “I’m starved so lets go and get cleaned up.” She got up and helped him up. He put his trench coat around her. “this one is too big” she laughed “but it is kinda comfy” she wrapped her arm in his. He moved his arm and took her hand “race ya” he laughed and they took off toward the house.

            They went through the backdoor laughing. They made their way to the dining room. “look what the cat dragged in” Renee snarled.

“breakfast was an hour ago. We expect everyone to be here on time when its meal time.”

“yeah well you’re old enough to be let down by expectations” Lilly snarled. “Jamie, I saved you some breakfast here next to me.” Renee chimed in. Lilly smiled and turned around “go ahead JAMIE have breakfast” she snorted and smirked.

“thank you, Renee, but uh I need to take a shower.” He squeezed Lilly’s hand and walked toward the living room. She followed him. “sweetheart I know you have to be hungry go back and eat it.”

“nah sitting next to her knowing what she’s doing or trying to do makes my stomach nauseous how about we get cleaned up and go to that diner on the corner? It reminds me of our diner” he smiled. “you remember our diner?”

“yeah it’s a used car lot now”

“oh, you liar” she laughed “that was in my memories last night”

“yeah but besides it wasn’t the diner I was impressed with “he kissed her head. They walked hand in hand to their respective rooms.

            After the shower James donned his usual blue suit and Lilly put on a pair of jeans and a blue tee shirt that said trust me I’m a doctor. She met James over at his room and they walked out together. “should we ask if our partners in crime want to go?”

“I did and they didn’t so doc you’re stuck with me”

“no one else doc I’d rather be stuck with” she laughed. “so I don’t normally do this but if you want to drive I’ll let you” she tossed him the keys to her bike. “really?”

“yeah I figured after last night you earned it” she beamed. He drove them to their restaurant with Lilly holding on for dear life. “I could get used to this driving thing. I like you holding on to me” he snickered. “why do you think I let you drive?” she winked and they swayed their hands back and forth as they went in. “I have a confession”

“what” he took a bite of his pancakes.

“before I met you I didn’t give two cents about bananas. Now it’s like hard wired into my DNA! After our daiquiri night you wouldn’t believe how many bananas I went through to get it to taste like yours. I had Lucas make me one, Jacob make one I made one none of the tasted like yours. I don’t know if you put a special time lord potion in it or what but none of them tasted like yours. You owe me at least two I’d say” she laughed. “I wonder now if you both made one if they’d taste the same?”

“nope”

“how do you know?”

“because my secret ingredient is love” he winked. She giggled and shook her head at him. “oh aren’t you the charming one.” He laughed at her. They stayed at the diner for a long time talking about thing and enjoying each other’s company. Then before they could stall any longer they headed back to hell.

            When they got back Sophia and Renee had tasks for everyone. Of course, Renee tried to get James to help her with her tasks but at the last-minute Jack would step in and take his place. When they were finish Lilly went to the stables. There was this one beautiful stallion that was so wild no one was allowed to ride it. It was acting up when Lilly came in. “aw sweetheart its ok. What’s wrong?” the horse whined and paced in its stall. It was getting worked up. Lilly looked “well of course! No one’s cleaned your stall!” she was getting mad. “hey, its ok I’ll do it” she took the horse out and it was acting wild. “don’t worry love I’ll take care of you. You know what while you’re out let me check you out.” she checked his shows. They needed changed. he hadn’t been brushed and it was not doing well. “I’m so sorry! Believe me” she looked into his eyes “whenever I find out who’s responsible they will pay. You don’t treat a beautiful animal like you like this. I tell you what when I get done you’ll be happy. Well go for a ride, right?” the horse seemed to understand and get excited. “oh yeah” she chuckled “you have run in a long time I can tell. There’s also other things I can tell let’s see what’s your name?” she looked at the stall. “you have got to be kidding me” she laughed.  “oh yeah” she giggled “we definitely have to pretty you up Captain.” Lilly cleaned out the stall and took care of his shoes “now it’s a little cold but let’s get you cleaned up I know your namesake likes blonds and there’s a pretty palomino over there I know you have your eyes on”

“oh, Lils you amaze me” James said from behind causing her to jump out of her skin. “you know exactly what everyone needs even this horse.”

“well I grew up around horses. It’s easy to understand.”

“he likes you said you were the only one to care.” She looked at him funny. “I speak horse” he smiled. “oh, you do not!” she laughed

“yeah I do actually. I speak a lot of things. You know you almost do you knew exactly the issue with its foot and the palomino.” Lilly laughed.

“that one wasn’t much of a stretch. Ask him if he minds a bath.”

“he doesn’t but he does want to go for a run”

“we will sweetheart we will” she kissed his nose. She got the water and bathed the horse. It pranced around it felt so good. She dried it off and it was happy. “oh, you started something. All of them want cleaned.”

“I swear whoever’s in charge is done when I’m through.”

“they don’t like him so they’re happy.”

“alright then I will find the best to take care of you. Alright Jamie want to help? That palomino has her eyes on you” he chuckled. “she’s a blond and us blonds like cuties with dreamy brown eyes.” He chuckled at her and went to the horse.

            It took a long time but all of the horses were happy. “why don’t you see if the rest want to ride because all of these need exercise.” Lilly was saddling up Captain Jack, the horse, when the real Captain Jack came down. He was going to tell her something but James stopped him and asked him to ride. The Doctor and Rose came down and they were going to do the same thing but James stopped them too. There were four horses and five riders. “come on pretty one you’re with me” Lilly took his hand and helped him on the horse. He held on to her and everyone went for a long ride. They sat out by the lake looking up at the stars. Lilly knew something was up. She could feel the anxiety in her bones. She was trying to shake it off but couldn’t. she grabbed James’ hand. “I’m not sure how telepathy works on someone like me but if you can send me good vibes I really could use them right now” she squeezed his hand. All of a sudden a warm feeling came over her like a gentle spring breeze. “is that you?”

“Yeah did it work?”

“yeah thank you. He’s here isn’t he? That’s why everyone came to warn me about isn’t it?”

“Yeah” he said softly “are you ok?”

“no…yeah…I don’t know. I’m trying to be strong.”

“you don’t have to be strong for me love.”

“I’m … I’m… I’m scared of what I’m going to do when I see him. I don’t know if I’ll fall apart or if I’ll beat the daylights out of him.”

“you’ll have both of us and Jack and Rose there for you. We are a team Lils all of us and when one is down the others stand up.”

“I’m so terrified of when I go to bed if he’ll sneak in and…”

“hey, we won’t let him! I’ll stay with you…stay up all night even if need be.”

“thank you Jamie.”

“you’re welcome my love”

“I don’t want everyone to walk on tippy toes for me or freeze out here for me.”

“we aren’t it’s a beautiful night out. its relaxing here.” She laid her head on his shoulder. She drew circles on his chest. “somehow when I’m with you all my monsters go away. However there are times I have night terrors like fighting in my sleep night terrors. Since you know everything I give you permission anytime I have one and you can’t wake me up otherwise to go into my head and wake me up.”

“Lilly are you sure?”

“yeah because sometimes if I don’t wake up I don’t know if I will. It’s happened before a friend’s dog came into my room and barked till it woke me up. So, if you can do that I don’t want you feeling guilty. I want you to help me.”

“you have my word Lilly I’ll protect you any way I can.”

“thank you” she squeezed him. She felt his arm. It was cold. He was shivering but wouldn’t dare tell her. “Theta anytime I say I don’t want anyone freezing for me it especially means you! Come on my favorite Martian let’s face the music.”

“Lilly are you sure? I don’t mind staying here or even in the barn again.”

“sweetheart making it to my 21st anniversary was the goal it doesn’t mean anything if you’re not there to celebrate with me! besides I’m praying he’s asleep. All we have to do is make it through tomorrow and Saturday and we’ll be ok. You’ve evaded monsters before this is the biggest one yet” she smiled bravely.

“I’m so proud of you” he kissed her.

“thank you” she closed her eyes took his hand and they took the horses back to the stable. “its dark and hopefully late maybe he’s in bed?” she took a deep breath. “ok lets do this cupcake”

“after you dumpling” he chuckled at ther.

            They walked into the dining room and went into the living room heading up stairs. “Lilliana aren’t you going to say hello to your father?” it was Sophia. “he said he hasn’t seen you in years. He made sure to come to see you.” Lilly looked at Sophia she had a smirk on her face. She saw Jack, Rose and The Doctor come in and held on to James’ hand for dear life. “now Lilliana don’t be rude. That’s unbecoming of a lady.” She knew she had played her ace card. “hello Matthew. If you’ll excuse me I’m going to bed.”

“Lilliana” his voice ran cold. Her blood stopped flowing. The sound of his voice after all these years still made her panic. James squeezed her hand. His voice made Vincent Price sound like Muppet baby. “you don’t have to do this!” James told her.

“I think I do. I can’t let him have power over me anymore.”

“come down here Lilliana” like she was being mind controlled she followed. “now let me look at you. You have grown up.” He checked her out. Lilly could feel the anger rising in James. He reached out to touch her and she pulled back. “now Lilliana there’s no reason to be like that.” Sophia snapped at her. Lilly looked at him. He looked the epitome of evil. She took a deep breath and looked over at Jack and The Doctor. She squeezed James hand. “Jamie this…this…this.. is Matthew. He’s…he’s I’ve told you about him.” She wouldn’t dare call him her father “this is James.”

“hello James” Matthew looked at him. Lilly knew that look. He was sizing him up. “hello” James had a stern cold tone to his voice. “well come on all lets have a drink” Renee chimed in. “Jamie you can sit here.”

“Renee knock it off! He’s with me and no amount of trying to get between us is going to work.”

“excuse me?” she feigned innocence.

“cut the crap! All weekend you have been trying to get between us. Its pathetic and makes you look like the bigger fool than you are! Not only that but his name is James or you can address him as Dr. Smith.” She was getting annoyed. “so you can cut the crap.”

“now who looks like the petty jealous one?” Sophia chimed in

“you guys enjoy your tea. I’m going to bed” she squeezed his hand.

“Lilliana sit down” Matthew scolded her. She looked at The Doctor. Something about him gave her the strength to do what she did next which surprised everyone. “I’m sorry Matthew the days of you telling me what to do are over.” she got firm.

“Lillian I am just trying to have tea with my daughter I haven’t seen her in 20 years.”

Haven’t bene your daughter in 40 years. You lost that right a long, long time ago.” James squeezed her hand. “Lilliana stop being a spoiled brat! You have been acting that way all weakened.” Sophia chimed.

“Sophia this is between me and him” she looked at her and gave her a stern and firm look.

‘yes this is still my house though”

“haven’t we established its not? Doctor can you please hand me my jacket?” he looked at her but did as she asked. “thank you” she reached in and go an envelope out. “love will you hold on to this please” she handed it to James.

Lilly after everything Matthew has given you how can you act like this? I would give anything to have my father have tea with me. I would have given anything to have Matthew as my father.”

“really Renee? Really you are wanting to go down this road?”

“how do you think you’ve gotten famous?”

“Renee this has nothing to do with you.” James spoke up.

“how dare you speak to me now Jamie”

“Renee remind me again what all he has given me?”

“do you really want to start that? How many times have you gone to school? How many trips around the world have you taken? How many presidents royals dignitaries have you met? You’ve gone to the finest schools and you don’t even appreciate it. You are a shame on this family. Everything you do is to make yourself look better. You don’t care about anyone else. You never have. You don’t know how lucky you had it Lilliana! At least you had a father.” Lilly looked at her and started laughing. She was in tears she was laughing so hard. “do you hear that James? Do you hear that Rose? Doctor do you really hear what she just said?”

“what’s going on?” James looked at her. She was having a full belly laugh. “lucky...lucky? you think I was lucky? Be careful what you wish for.”

“Lilliana” Matthew got stern. It was a warning to her to not say another word.

“geeze dad lets tell Renee how lucky I was shall we?”

“Lilliana!” he gave her an evil look. Lilly let go of James hand. She started walking back and forth like she was lecturing her class. James and The Doctor were on alert. “ok class let’s get a look at how lucky little Lilly was shall we? First question! A little girl is two years old. Now class what should her first memory be hmm? Playing with dolls? What do you say James?”

“uh yeah I guess Lilly what’s going on?”

“oh yes I’m conducting a lesson on just how lucky I was. What was lucky Lilly’s first memory?”  
“LILLIANA!” Matthew stood up.

“SIT DOWN!” she got stern and hateful.

“I’m not sitting her for this.” Before anyone could stop him, Lilly picked him off the couch and threw him up against the wall with a heavy thump. “like I said what is my first memory? The coldness of my father’s necklace against my chest as he is penetrating me.”

“LILLIANA!” Sophia and Renee yelled. She kept him pinned against the wall. “second thing I remember the feeling of fears as his lips touched me in places no 4-year-old should ever hear about. Third memory being thrown up against the shower wall at 10 years old bleeding from various orifices. Fourth memory being a 13-year-old girl. Having the leader of Photobus Technology raping me per my dad’s request and him watching! Fifth memory fighting off daddy dearest to keep him from attacking my best friend. Sixth memory being 17 years old and pregnant with my own sister. Seventh memory seeing the father of my daughter pick her up and look at her like he looks at you. Eight memory losing daughter to illness. Ninth memory being forced to marry someone because it was a good business decision and let’s make it 10. Being held blackmail if I didn’t comply with said husbands request otherwise my best friend would be murdered so dad” she kept him pinned against the wall. All the rage she can must pinning him to the wall. “how did you like that walk down memory lane?” she punched him in the face and he fell. She kept punching him. It took James, The Doctor, and Jack all three to pull Lilly off him. She put her foot on his throat. “you ever, ever see me or anyone else I love again you can guarantee I won’t quit! You see dad I’m not that little scared girl anymore. No I’ve grown up and I’ll be damned if I ever let you control another thought, moment or cell of my body again!” she turned around and saw Sophia. Her head was down. “sad thing is, you know I’m right don’t you Sophia?” Sophia was wiping her eyes. “I’ll…we’ll get our things and leave. I wish you the best on your wedding aunt Sophia.” Lilly got the envelope from James. “here you go aunt Sophia.” She dropped it on the table and turned to walk away. Jack had taken Matthew outside.

“mom! How can you stand there and let her say these horrible, untrue things about uncle Matthew?”

“Lilliana” Sophia called out to her as she went to leave. “don’t go”

“what?” everyone said in unison.

“I’m … I’m… I’m sorry please don’t leave. Please you…your friends stay.”

“how can you seriously want them to stay after what this psycho just did? Mom have you gone mad?”

“I’m sorry Sophia. I never meant for anyone to find out it was going to be my secret to the grave.”

“I understand…just as mine”

“I’ll keep yours as well”

“what secret? Mother what secret” Sophia looked at Lilly.

“you don’t have to do this now” Lilly said softly.

“I know…but new year, new life its time”

“we’ll let you two have some privacy.”

“Lilly stay please” Sophia took the envelop and opened the letter. Lilly grabbed James hand.

“mother please what is this about?”

“you know I had you when I was 17 correct.”

“correct and my father was killed in the line of duty.”

“no Renee he wasn’t”

“what?”  
“your father…your father…your father is Matthew.”

“what? No he isn’t”

“this envelope proves it. It’s a DNA test. Matthew raped me when I was 17 just like he did Lilly.”

“but you’re his sister?”

“and I was his daughter”

“Renee to keep Matthew out of prison your grandfather moved me here. He knew Matthew would take over the business. So instead of doing the right thing he black mailed me. I had to keep quiet. He provided for us and when Lilly was in school for architecture he commissioned her to build this house. That’s how she owns it. He let us move in here and held over my head all these years how if she wanted to all she had to do as throw me out. I hated Lilly all this time because her mother got pregnant around the same time I did that was another reason Matthew never went to prison. They didn’t want their precious child be without a father. At the time they thought Lilly was going to be a boy. He was going to be the heir to the throne. Turns out when she was a girl things changed.”

“why did you want a DNA test?”

“because… also at the time I was seeing someone else. That was who I based your father off of. He was in the military and we lost touch until a couple years ago. When I met Christopher I just had to find out. “so all this time you are my sister?”

“no” Lilly said softly. “I did a dna test myself” she bit her lip. “I am your 1st cousin. When Sophia had her test done I did mine. I finally after all these years figured out why he hated me. not only I wasn’t their son I’m not even his daughter so to punish me he abused me. Colleen found out. she couldn’t deal with and she left me. to live with him and my shame. To be honest I’m not sure who my father is I have an idea but I would rather not believe it than to think he could be and let me endure that. I’m sorry Sophia about the house I didn’t know. They told me it was mine but I had to let you live here as long as you wanted. I had no idea it was blood money if I would have known I would have let you have it. I know what its like to be blackmailed. I would never do that to you.”

“Lilly” she started sobbing “I’m sorry. All these years I never knew about your abuse.”

“its ok I survived. Made a touch cookie out of me. well with a little help from a special friend” she looked at The Doctor and smiled. She’d never tell James even though they’re the same man, thoughts, memories etc in Lilly’s mind The Doctor is the one that was there that night in that leather jacket and blue eyes. James is the universe’s gift to her since he was taken. Besides there are no sparks between them just a great friendship. When she’s with James that’s when the fireworks go like the 4th of July. “but Sophia I know this is hard time for you so if you don’t want us around we’ll leave.”

“leave? Child I never wanted anything less. I want you to be at my wedding and I would hope” she came over to Lilly and looked at her and James. “that when the two of you get married you’d invite me.” Lilly’s eyes got big.

“uh well uh” she giggled “we uh haven’t exactly got that far aunt Sophia.” It was comical to everyone in the room because the two of them had the same nervous habit of putting their hands on the back of their neck. They actually did it in synch when she said that causing the room to giggle. “but I know true love when I see it and it will happen and probably sooner than you think”

“ok yeah uh if I ever decide I’ve lost my mind and get married you’re invited. “Lilly smiled. Rose and The Doctor were chuckling. “but uh ya know they’re twins so usually the older one goes first” Lilly smired at her friend. Sophia turned towards Rose and The Doctor. Lilly whispered to James. “paybacks a bitch” she giggled as Sophia told Rose and The Doctor she’d expected them to as soon. “now I’m tired of all of the animosity that has been felt this weekend. Lilliana I want to start fresh with you niece.” She hugged her. “come sit down I want to hear about how all of you met.” Lilly sat down.

“ya know there’s this really weird show on I’ve been watching called _Inspector Why_. He’s in this town and all these strange things happen. I feel like I just walked into an episode of that show.”

“you mean the one with the Scottish detective Andra?”

“yes! And no offense boys but he’s hot!” Lilly chuckled.

“yeah he rocks the total…” she looked at The Doctor and then at James and back and forth then to Lilly. Lilly did the same thing. She looked at Rose and they busted out laughing. “what are you two up to now?” The Doctor asked looking at the both of them. “would one of you speak with a Scottish accent?” Lilly asked.

“no!” they both said “why?”

“I watch that show! I know oh my god you two are right!” Sophia laughed. The three ladies laughed. Renee was upset about how things have turned out and left. “what is…will one of you three tell me what’s so funny?” James was getting flustered.

“I don’t like the beard. I don’t know about you two” Lilly looked at Rose and Sophia. “I guess its because we’re used to clean shaven baby face” Rose kissed The Doctor’s cheek.

“baby face? I don’t have a baby face” he was getting flustered.

“you’re just too cute when you don’t know what’s going on.” Lilly pinched his cheek. “here love let me show you your doppelganger” she pulled up a picture of the actor and showed him the picture. “are you kidding? Jack looks more like us than he does.”

“put your glasses on” Rose got them out of his pocket.

“still not seeing it”

“for someone such a genius you can be so daft at times.” Rose kissed The Doctor. Finally after a few minutes of teasing both The Doctor and James humored their girls and admitted they looked like him. They stayed up for a long time and when she went to bed that night Lilly for the first time in her life felt like she had a family.

  



	11. Chapter 11 1st of 40

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nice fluffy chapter

Chapter 11 1st of 40

 

            The next day was pretty much a continuation of the previous night. Sophia and Lilly were getting along. Lilly had a few loose ends to tie up before she went off with the love of her life. She got ahold of Martha and found out the little girl Lilly referred her to was diagnosed with asthma. She was doing well though. Jackie was fine and Lilly had some paperwork drawn up. That evening was the wedding/new year’s bash. It was a black-tie affair.

            As a wedding gift Lilly, Rose, and the bridal party got mani-pedis and their hair done while the boys relaxed at the mansion. Lilly remembered something the leather angel mentioned. He didn’t do domestics. She got out her phone and sent both a message. _I remember a long time ago you said you don’t do domestic. I just wanted to let both of you know I appreciate both of you for coming. I literally couldn’t have gotten through this without you. So thank you! I love both of you. Well one more than the other but which one?_ With a wink emoji. She giggled and told Rose their response. “The Doctor said yep I know it’s me. Ya know I only knew him for one night many moons ago but he’s so different now. He’s still guarded but he’s also a lot more mellow. Excellent job Rose for helping him out.”

“thank you”

“and, thanks for picking him. The universe I guess knew I needed Jamie. So just like The Doctor he comes when he’s needed.”

“honestly he’s shown me so many things I can’t imagine my life without him. Well again.”

“have you two ever talked about getting married?”

“ha!” she laughed. “I don’t think he will. He’s I think still hung up on the” she looked at the lady in front of her and around “well you know the change thing.”

“right yes of course. Sometimes I forget they’re not from around here”

“yeah I know”

“so, are they both wearing tuxedos tonight?”

“oh yeah and The Doctor in a tuxedo woo” she fanned herself. “Unless Jamie wears a blue tux, how are we going to tell them apart?”

“I don’t know” they both laughed.    

            The spa day ended and everyone headed home to get ready. The boys weren’t there which the girls were bummed about. It was getting late. Lilly and Rose got ready in the same room. Rose wore a gold off the shoulder floor length gown with pink ice earrings and necklace. “aw! His pink and yellow human!” Lilly giggled. Lilly wore a Prussian blue halter dress with sequins just under the bodice. It was curvy and showed off her figure. She had a nice figure but she was never one to fuss about curves and cleavage. “I hate wearing dresses” she laughed. “I get so self-conscious in them.”

“why? You look gorgeous! Don’t ever say you’re not sexy because you are hot!” Lilly blushed to high heavens.

“thank you” she smiled sheepishly. “I just…I don’t feel comfortable showing my body. My legs sure but I still feel so insecure because of what happened. That’s why you don’t see me showing cleavage. Um anyway” she shook her head. “I can tell you one thing. When The Doctor sees you both of his hearts are going to stop!” Rose beamed at the compliment. “oh, hold on let’s do selfies” she got her phone and they took one together. “so, I just need to warn you” she said as she typed a text to The Doctor. “I don’t carry a defibrillator. You might no, you will need on when you see Rose” and send. She laughed as there was a knock at the door. “damn did you run up here?” Lilly laughed as she answered the door. “nope I walked” Jack laughed. “hey, you” Lilly hugged him.

“here’s the paperwork and I get to be the one to escort you two beautiful ladies to your knights in shining armor. If I can remember which is which.”

“mine’s the cute one” Lilly laughed.

“oh yeah then that’s me” Jack laughed. He put both arms out for both girls and together they walked down the stairs. The boys were on the couch talking when the girls came down. They both stood up and had their mouths open. “Blimey you look gorgeous!” they both said in unison. “If you say for a human I’m going to smack you” Rose laughed.

“damn she wasn’t kidding. You guys look gorgeous!” Lilly smiled. It was a lot easier than she thought to tell them apart. Besides the fact James was wearing his glasses because he knew Lilly liked it, he couldn’t take his eyes off her. He came up to her and wrapped his arms around her. You are breathtaking Dr. Patrick.” He whispered in her ear. “and to see you in this dress makes the domestics all worth it” he kissed her cheek. She felt so loved right then. “thank you love” she hugged him tightly. They piled into the limo and drove off to the church.

            When they got there, Rose and Lilly were whisked away to help the bride to be. She had a beautiful white gown flowing at the bottom. “I always wanted to be Cinderella now I can” she squealed. Lily smiled at her. “Aunt Sophia you look beautiful.”

“my darlings if those two boys don’t propose after seeing you then it’s their loss! Lilly your dress, who’s the designer? I must have her name.”

“uh…uh…her uh…her name is Patty Ashton.” The truth is it was Lilly who made this dress. When her and Lucas were kids they used to ballroom dance professionally. She had to make their outfits. “never heard of her”

“uh yeah uh she’s very obscure” Lilly smiled wanting to change the subject. “well I have an even for valentine’s day. I need her to design a dress.”

“uh well uh see she’s taking the next year off. She’s uh found the love of her life and is uh travelling with him so uh she’ll be busy.” She smiled “uh anyway aunt Sophia I have something for you but uh open it when I’m not around please and preferably alone.”

“whatever for?”

“because its personal” she smiled. “uh aunt Sophia you have your crew here do you mind if I go back to my date? See he’s in a tux and wearing his glasses and he’s too damn hot” she laughed. The other girls laughed and Sophia smiled. “yes, my love you can” Lilly smiled and gave Sophia an envelope. “congratulations” she hugged her and left.

            Rose led Lilly to the pews where the boys were. As soon as James saw Lilly he beamed from ear to ear. She sat down next to him “I’m going to have to think of things we have to endure to get you back in that tux” she whispered to him. He smiled at her and blushed. “as long as you’re in that dress I’ll do whatever you want” she giggled at him. “thanks for coming back for me” she put her hand on his cheek. “you see now that I’m part human I had to. There was no way around it.” He said matter of factly. She looked at him puzzled.

“why?”

“because I only have on heart and you stole it my little thief” he smiled and kissed her sweetly. He put his head against hers. He entwined his long fingers with hers just as the wedding march began. They stood up and watched aunt Sophia walk down the aisle. Lilly was always under the thought that after her marriage she’d never get married again. However, as she held James’ hand it felt right it was as if he was supposed to be there.

            Through the whole service Lilly kept thinking about Jack saying he’d dance at her wedding. She was thinking about things she never thought of before. It also didn’t go unnoticed that James was haphazardly rubbing her fingers with his while holding her hand. She kept thinking she was imagining it but it seemed he was particularly rubbing that finger. It was probably just a nervous tick. She draws circles on his arm all the time. However, it felt so right when he was doing it.

            The ceremony was beautiful. They piled into the reception hall with the caterers the band and the open bar. James wondered how Lilly was going to be around alcohol. “oh, love I wasn’t an alcoholic. It doesn’t bother me. if you want a drink have one” she smiled at him. _god doctor get yourself together_ James admonished himself. Ever since he saw her come down with Jack he’s not been able to take his eyes off her. Yes, he’s always thought she was beautiful but something about her tonight really got to him. It even took his breath away and he forgot to give her his special gift he had the Tardis make for him. It didn’t seem appropriate now that the wedding was over and he didn’t want to wait till valentine’s day. Course he could get into the Tardis and make it valentine’s day but he already had big plans for them. He went over to the bar and made up a banana daquiri for her and had the bartender make one for him. He sat down next to her she laughed. “oh, you are my hero!” and kissed him. She took a drink of the bartenders and kind of frowned. Then she took a drink of his. She smiled big and winked. “I’ll take this one.”

“you really can tell, can’t you?”

“yep” she popped the p. “ya know I wonder if you and twinsy both made one if I could tell the difference?” she laughed.

            They ate dinner and then went to dance. She was so close to him he was having a challenging time being a gentleman. They danced for a long time and to many songs. It felt so nice holding her in his arms. he realized how much he missed her today on their little shopping trip. To James it was only him and Lilly in the room till aunt Sophia came up to her with tears in her eyes. “Lilliana, I love you!” James smiled as he watched the woman who a couple days ago admonished her for petty reasons do a complete about face. She gave her the biggest hug. “I’m telling you I want that designer’s number! This gown is gorgeous! Then again love it’s you that makes it gorgeous.” She turned to James. “you better not break her heart. They don’t make em like her anymore.” And you’re right he does look hot tonight! Even with those bloody shoes on!” she laughed. Lilly’s face turned blood red. “so” he chuckled “you were talking about me?’

“well I just told her you were in a tux and I wanted to get back to you.” She laughed.

“what did you do to get her to do that?”

“the right thing” she smiled sheepishly. His heart couldn’t have gotten prouder. “you signed the house over”

“yeah on the stipulation the staff gets a raise, Jackie gets paid for the time she was off and they get a new ranch hand.”

“oh, Lilliana my queen I love you!” he picked her up and spun her around. She laughed and neither one remembered they weren’t alone. People started cheering and they laughed and went out for some fresh air. They both leaned up against the wall. “ya know Jamie if I could go back and do it…I don’t think there’s anything I’d change in my life.”

“what do you mean?”

“because if I wasn’t abused, I would have never been in that bar. I would have never met your past you and gotten better. I never would have gone on to do what I have done which in turn led me back to you. So, no matter what does or doesn’t happen between us all of that just for this moment, for this weekend to give my aunt some peace it was worth it.” He looked at her. At that moment, the moon shined on her hair. It took his breath away. Her blue eyes matched her dress and the smile on her face almost did him in. he leaned down and kissed her. Just like the first time he kissed her it was out of a need for her to forgive him for the world to forgive him. This time though it was full of love and want and pride. Everything his sweet queen has been through and she can still see the bright side. “Lilliana, you are beyond my vocabulary wonderful. I don’t know anyone else that would ever think to look at things the way you have”

“ya know it’s your fault”

“me?”

“yeah you taught me to see the bigger picture.” She smiled at him. “yeah look at it this way. You met me at a time when I needed a friend.”

“honestly I did too”

“however, it wasn’t the right time for us. We both had to grow up and get over our demons. So, you met Rose. She’s got no future and is going to be stuck like that. She reminds you a bit of me. she loves you and you start to have feelings for her. She absorbs the time vortex to save you. You take it away and regenerate. Just so happens you lose your hand and can grow another.”

“yeah where’s this going?”

“you’ll see” she smiled. “you go to this world where there is no Rose Tyler but the alternate mother dies and leaves the alternate father alive. By some crazy force they meet. Jackie’s now living with her husband who’s rich. Rose gets taken away from you but only for as long as it takes for you to truly realize how head over heels you, well your brother you know what I mean and for her she makes her way back to you, him. Suddenly, a dalek zaps him. He doesn’t want to leave Rose so he zaps it into this sweet baby” she kissed his hand. “Meanwhile he’s traveling with Donna. She sounds feisty but she’s needed to help make you. You guys save the world again. Martha meets Mickey, Jackie’s back with her family and then what happens. Rose chooses him so he has to take you just so that we can complete the circle. Jackie’s got her family, Rose has her true love. He’s not hurting anymore nor alone and he has a brother. Tell me Jamie that’s not coincidence.”

“wow” he thought about it. “ya know I kinda wondered why when we’re the same she dumped me.”

“honestly I’ve never asked but I know that night we met I shook your brother’s hand. I didn’t feel a spark. We reached for a banana and hit knuckles and to me it might as well have been Benjamin Franklin with the kite. I felt so much electricity. The point is I call it god you call it whatever saw how much good you do and they were just giving you a chance to be happy. They were pruning us all for all of this whatever it maybe.”

“damn Lils I never thought about that.”

“and to be perfectly honest I’m glad you don’t regenerate.”

“why?”

“because I’ve seen two versions. You’re the same but completely different. Don’t get me wrong I’d be so happy you’re alive but having to get used to a new personality, new quirks and even though in my head I know it’s the same my heart I’m afraid I’d feel like I was cheating on you. I say that and god help me if something happens to you” she actually choked back tears.

“hey gorgeous girl nothing’s going to happen.” He wrapped his arms around her. “were going to be together let’s see it looks like about 40 years.”

“I hope you’re right” she held on tight.

“Lilly I’m a time lord I can see time lines.”

“so, you can see…”

“yeah”

“and us?”

“we’re together about 40 years then both of our lines are gone.”

“I don’t know if that’s romantic, sweet, sad or depressing”

“all of the above” he chuckled “that’s why I don’t look.”

“you’re not just saying that to make me feel better, are you?”

“no love I wouldn’t do that” he held her close and closed his eyes he breathed in her scent wanting to memorize how she looked, smelled and felt tonight. Time lines or not things can happen. “thanks for listening to me” she held on tight.

“I’ll gladly listen to you love.”

            They stayed out there and talked for a long time. “thanks for wearing the glasses tonight” she bit her lip “you look so adorable in them”

“anything for you love”

“I do have a question I can understand humans but with ‘superior time lord body’ as twinsy says why does he need them?”

“helps him focus”

“really?”

“yeah it keeps his eyes focused on what he’s doing. And he thinks it makes him look cleverer” he laughed.

“well that’s interesting.”

“me it helps but I know someone that loves them so I wear them” he nudged her shoulder.

“here let me see” she took them off and put them on her. “sweetheart you are blind as a bat” she looked up at him. “but I can see that cheesy smile!” he giggled like a little boy.

Now I see why you like them. You are hot in them” he kissed her.

“well I’ll get me a pair if I get that reaction” she laughed. All of a sudden fireworks went off. They looked around “well apparently lord of time forgot to tell me its new year’s” she chuckled.

“I just let it be a surprise and I kiss you at midnight”

“when”

“about two minutes ago”

“seriously? Come on cutie it’s our first of 40-new year’s make it one…” he shut her up with a deep passionate knee quivering leg raising kiss. “what were you saying?” he winked at her.

“I…I…I was talking?” she stuttered.  “damn Jamie you can do that again.”

“oh, I will I have 49 years to do it again.” He nudged her. “so Lils I meant to give you this before we left but you flabbergasted me and I forgot.” He pulled out a box and handed it to her. She looked at him and opened it up. “oh my god” she gasped and put one hand over her mouth. “it’s beautiful!” she took out the silver chain necklace. It had a single Tardis blue heart. Around the heart were one ring going left to right diagonally and another ring the opposite way. “this line is your name in Gallifreyan and this line is Theta Sigma in Gallifreyan.”

“Theta this...this…is beautiful!” she handed it to him to put it on her. “when did you do this?”

“today. It was my idea. He gave Rose a god chain with two hearts one pink and one yellow.”

]”oh my god this is so beautiful! Thank you” she kissed him. “how do you say my name in Gallifreyan? He said something that sounded very musical. “that is beautiful.”

“maybe someday I’ll teach you h0ow to read it”

“yes! That would be awesome!”

“there you two are!” The Doctor and Rose interrupted them. “we were looking for you” Lilly saw Rose had the bouquet. They both looked at each other and giggled. “Good luck with that” Lilly laughed.

“I know right!”

“do we even want to know?” James asked.

“if you don’t know we’re not telling.” Lilly smiled. Rose and Lilly walked off together laughing like sisters. “Brother do you think we can put up with that for a year?” James asked.

“a year what are you talking about?” he looked at his brother.

“Lilly’s still coming with us.”

“I was thinking more along the lines of rest of their lives.” The Doctor rubbed the back of his neck. “Were you thinking what I was thinking during the ceremony?”

“yep” The Doctor popped the p. “and I can’t believe I was.”

“me neither but then I look at her and it seems right.”

“I know. I just…human life is so fleeting.”

“yeah but remember what it was like when she was gone.”

“yeah”

“those few fleeting years would be worth it.”

“yeah they would be. come on Romeo before our Juliets get us into more trouble.”


	12. Chapter 12 – Stuck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a little silliness at lilly's expense

Chapter 12 – Stuck

 

            The four of them went back to the mansion. Jack went home with a friend he made. “It was such a beautiful ceremony and I’m so glad you two made up.” Rose hugged Lilly.

“me too but I don’t know about you guys but I’m so ready for real clothes again.” Lilly laughed.

“no, no, no stay down here and ring in the new year!” James smiled at her. He knew she wouldn’t be able to resist. She took his hand and they all sat by the fireplace. It was relaxing. “so, Lilly where do you want to go on your first adventure?’ The Doctor asked. He knew what Lilly really wanted but he knew his brother’s plans. “is there really that Barcelona planet with the dogs?” they cracked up. “that joke never gets old” James laughed.

“yeah there is”

“I want to go there”

“we can’t for a while. They have something going on and we don’t want to get in the middle of it.”

“then I don’t know somewhere in the past. I might be too freaked out about the future. Oh I know! July 4th, 1776. That would be awesome! I want to meet George Washington.”

“that sounds like a good idea. Thomas Jefferson owes me a drink.”

“not sure I even want to ask”

“you don’t trust me” James laughed.

            They sat around and talked for a while. The Doctor did make Lilly a banana daquiri and Lilly was right she can tell the difference. All of them laughed. James was sitting in front of the fireplace. Lilly leaned up against his arm. “I love you my queen.” He whispered lovingly in her ear.  She smiled and nuzzled her head against his arm. “I love you too my prince” she smiled. It was about 4am. “are you ready for bed?” he asked her.

“yeah I need to change. Goodnight you two. Behave and we’ll see you in the morning.” Lilly hugged the two of them and took James’ hand. They walked up stairs. Lilly felt the back of her head. As part of the celebration they had a silly string fight. She got it all in her hair and all over herself. It was sticky and nasty. “god I got that crap in my hair! I need a shower and damn this stuff sinks! You go to bed love and I’ll join you.” She kissed him. He kept kissing her not wanting to let her go. “down tiger” she laughed “this is my aunt’s house.”

“sorry” he blushed “it’s just you in this dress…”

“I was talking to myself” she laughed. He kissed her one lat time. “Ok Dr. Patrick take your shower and I’ll be waiting.” He winked.

“oh, I love the Donna side of you” she chuckled. “you’re such a flirt.”

“who said it’s the Donna side?” he winked again.

‘because your other self down there sure doesn’t” she laughed.

“oh, he’s just behaving. Trust me get him in the Tardis” he laughed. “besides remember we have telepathy. You’d be surprised what he says. Trust me Lils he’s not as innocent as you think”

“well” she kissed him. “I hope not” she laughed. “ya know for roses’ sake.” She chuckled and got her things “besides you probably weren’t pay attention downstairs.”

“why what’s going on?” she asked clueless confirming his previous statement.

“oh, Lils you are going to be so much fun!” he kissed her cheek and went to change. When she designed this house the bathroom that is in Lilly’s room only had a tub. She just wanted a quick shower. She was afraid she’d fall asleep in the tub she was that tired. She knew The Doctor and Rose would still be up so she was going to use their shower. “Hey sweetheart can you tell them I have to use their bathroom. Don’t want them walking in on me.”

“sure love” he said from Lilly’s bathroom.

Lilly took her bag and went to Rose’s room. She took her shower. She normally liked hot, hot showers but because James had gotten to her tonight more than usual she had to take a cooler shower. She wanted to be with him but he would be the first and only person she ever gave her consent to. When she did give her consent she didn’t want It to be in someone else’s home. She had a few hang-ups about that. To her it was disrespectful even if it was new years and they just came from a wedding where the bride and groom have already left for their honeymoon. She wanted their intimate life to be private and she had to work herself up into confidence to be able to allow it. She shook her head. She forgets he’s part alien. She didn’t even know how he felt about certain things. She wasn’t even sure if they even could. The way he was acting seemed like it was possible but she didn’t want to push the issue. Usually in the shower she’d have her bright ideas. Tonight, though as has been a lot have been on a certain half timelord. She was wondering if they did or could what it would be like. Would it be different crazy things? He made her feel like a teenager would feel. She never got to feel like that. As she washed her arm she looked down at the scars on her chest. She closed her eyes. She let him see everything except that. They were her battle scars. Whenever she was feeling vulnerable all she had to do was touch those three scars. It would remind her what she came through and reminded her to never let that happen again. This is a scar she’s never talked about. It’s also partly why she wears high neck tops. She doesn’t want to answer questions. “Oh, Jamie I hope you’re strong enough to deal with my one monster you’ve yet to see.”

            She was in her own world when she heard her phone vibrate. She got in the habit a long time ago of taking the phone with her when she goes into the bathroom. After the reason for her scars she vowed she’d never be helpless again. James texted her _you ok love?_ She loved it that he called her love. She really loved it that he called her his queen. To Lucas and Jacob, she was their princess but to James she was his queen. It made her feel extremely special. She must have been in there a while longer than she anticipated.  _Yeah sorry in my own world in the shower. I’ll be out soon_ she turned off the water and got out. She got dressed and then went to leave. She heard giggling. It wasn’t like a joke giggling more like a seductive giggle. She heard Rose and The Doctor. “Oh, hell no!” she whispered to herself. She was happy for them but she didn’t want to enjoy it with them. However, it did seem to answer at least one or two or three of her questions. She had no idea what to do. “pears!” she said to herself. She got her phone and texted James. “HELP! HELP ME!” he called her but she had it on mute.

“what? What’s wrong?” he texted her back.

“I need you to get me out of here!”

“alright I’ll be right over.” She called him and he answered immediately. “what Lilly what?” he was frantic. “stay there!”

“what? Why are you whispering?”

“I have to text” she sent a message.

“what’s wrong?”

“I need you to for the love of bananas send a message to your brother now! Tell him the Tardis is on fire make him think of pears SOMETHING to get them out of the room!”

“honey just leave”

“I can’t”

“why not? Just walk out the door. Besides I think they’re still downstairs.”

“James…please don’t make me spell it out for you.”

“spell what out?”

“USE YOUR TIMELORD BRAIN!!!”

“Lilly come on to bed. I’m tired besides if something was wrong with the Tardis he’d already know.”

“I can’t come to bed”

“why not?”

“I can’t leave the bathroom.”

“are you hurt?”

“no”

“then walk out the door honey it’s not a big deal”

“I swear to god I will get pears and shove them in your mouth!”

“what’s with the violence?”

“JAMIE!”

“what?”

“what’s your brother’s word? Oh yeah you are so damn THICK at times!”

“Lilly come on I want to go to sleep. Stop fooling around”

“I’m not the one fooling around. I swear if I get out of here you’re going to be sleeping alone for a long time”

“what did I do?”

“ok…ok…ok ask Jack what’s going on.”

“what does Jack have to do with this?”

“he can explain why I’m in the bathroom and your brother is in the other room with his girlfriend.”

“just sneak out of the bathroom.”

“Jamie please tell me this is a joke you guys conjured up.”

“Lilly I’m tired I’m going to go to bed. I’ll see you in the morning.”

“DON’T YOU DARE LEAVE ME!”

“Lils I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s going on.”

“yell fire tell him the Tardis has been abducted I don’t care just help me please! I need both out of the room so I can leave.”

“jack’s not answering”

“I’m seriously about to choke you now”

“he’s got it turned off from me”

“OF COURSE! HE’S WITH HIS FRIEND LIKE YOUR NOT SO INNOCENT BROTHER IS WITH ROSE!”

“just walk out Lilly it’s not that big of a deal.”

“ok so that oh so wonderful time lord biology how long does it last?”  
“through 12 regenerations”

“which one are you?”

“I’m 10 well would be 11 or 10.5 I’m not really sure”

“was our first time 9 then?”

“yes”

“I wish I could summon him up to knock you upside the head!”

“why?”

“my head is hurting now”

“come here and I’ll rub it”

“oh, you will alright! It’s all your fault!”

“love I’m sorry I’m tired and I’m falling asleep. I’m going to bed.”

“I wish I could”

“come here and you can”

“TELL YOUR BROTHER TO STOP SHAGGING ROSE THEN!”

“45 minutes”

“what?”

“that’s how long it took you to tell me what’s going on”

“no sweet pea I told you a long time ago! It took you that long to figure it out.”

“no, I knew it probably when you were in the shower”

“didn’t you tell them?”

“uh yeah”

“you didn’t did you”

“I was busy”

“THETA SIGMA WHATEVER YOUR LAST NAME IS YOU ARE IN TORUBLE!’

“Lungbarrow”

“huh”

“that’s my surname. I come from the house of Lungbarrow”

“how much longer do I have to wait”

“you don’t wanna know” smilie face emoji.

“shoot me now! You would think with his ‘superior hearing’ he’d know I was in here.”

“maybe he did” wink emoji.

“I’m really starting to hate you now”

“no, you don’t”

“when I could think of…oh god…” her phone rang. James was laughing on the other end. “I think they’re almost done.”

“Lilly, I haven’t laughed this hard in ages.”

“yeah well if it happened to you it wouldn’t”

“oh, Lils I love you but I am going to bed”

“don’t you dare! You won’t be my favorite Martian.”

“good thing I’m not from Mars.”

“you are a jerk”

“but yet you still love me”

“god I hope they both go to sleep soon. That way this will be our secret.”

“oh, I doubt it. He’ll be wired for hours.”

“Jamie you’re not helping!”

“I’ll probably not see you for hours.”

“get the Tardis go back and tell me not to take a shower. That way I can enjoy the night with you and not...wait technically he and Donna gave you life so would they be your mom and dad?”

“NO!” he was serious.

“haha oh yes this is good”

“Night Lils” he hung up on her.

“How dare you hang up on me!” she waited and there was no response. “hey Jamie, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” Still no response. Now she was on her own.

            After what seemed like forever there was quiet on the other side of the door. She dared to open it. It sounded like they were both asleep. She got her phone. Everything else she could get later she tiptoed her way to the door. “night Lils” she heard as she tried to sneak out. she turned around and saw him wink through the light of the moon coming through the window. She ran out and ran to her room. She got her pillow and him James over the head. He started laughing at her and fighting her back. “he knew I was in there! I can never face him again! She took a pillow and really hit him. “oh, you’ve had it now1 you’re bring out the oncoming storm in me and that’s not a good idea.”

“bring it on Stormie!” she hit him. He lunged after her and she ran across the bed. He cornered her against the wall. “now what?” he smirked at her.

“this” she tickled his ribs and ran. He grabbed her by the waist and threw her on the bed. They were laughing hysterically. Lilly looked into his eyes. Despite his threat there was not an ounce of anger in him. In fact, it was the opposite. “I love you” he kissed her forehead. She reached up and cupped his cheeks. “I love you too” she kissed him. The kiss was hot and passionate. Normally Lilly wouldn’t let it go much farther but it being new year’s and he was so close to her she was having a tough time resisting. “Jamie” she whispered breathlessly. She kissed his lower lip. “Lilly…I want to…”

“me too” she gulped truthfully hearing Rose and The Doctor did ignite something in her. “but not here…not like this” he whispered and fell next to her. She didn’t know what to say or do. She just kept quiet. She got her pillow and got under the covers. She closed her eyes and tried not to feel hurt. “Lilly”

“it’s ok Jamie go to sleep.”

“we need…”

“got to sleep”

“I can’t Lilly we have to talk”

“ok fine!” she flipped over on her back.

“Lilly…it’s not that I don’t want to”  
“its fine”

“it’s’…never mind”

“no…no tell me”

“I wanted it to be right. Things like that are very sacred to time lords. It’s different for humans. I just…”

“it’s ok Jamie I swear” she started feeling better. “I just got my feelings hurt but I understand and you’re right. I don’t want to here. This … this isn’t the right time nor place. To be honest” she sighed. I’ve never been with anyone voluntarily. I’m always afraid if I ever was that I’d freak out and make things weird or regret it in the morning. You’re right to stop us. I’m sorry I didn’t even think about you.”

“are we good? I don’t want us to ever go to bed mad at each other.”

“Yeah” she smiled. She reached up and kissed him. “now we’re good.”

“goodnight my queen”

“good night my prince” she snuggled up to him.

 

 

           

           


	13. Chapter 13 a new beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lilly starts her journey on the tardis and an old friend shows up

Chapter 13 a new beginning

            A couple hours later James woke up. Lilly was asleep. Normally he would lay there with her but he knew his brother was up. He wanted to see him. He went downstairs and he was sitting there drinking coffee. “Did you have a nice night?” James asked with a grin.

“question is did you?” he smirked back. They were just like brothers. “well actually yeah”

“you know she’s going to be weird around you now”

“I know I should have just acted like I was asleep but it was too good of an opportunity. You should have seen the look on her face. It was priceless.”

“I was crying I was laughing so hard. She was freaking out. here read the texts” he showed him his phone. The Doctor laughed hysterically at their conversation. “this is better than I imagined” he was crying now “Rose can’t know anything about this!”

“of course! The plan was just to get Lilly back for trying to get me at breakfast. I wouldn’t hurt Rose. You know as old as we are I think it’s funny how we bring out the mischievous side out in each other.”

“yeah reminds me of our time at the academy.” They both laughed. “but our ladies bring out the randy 95-year-old in us.”

“can you imagine if we told them that” James laughed. “to them 95 is old and in the grave.”

“I know” he laughed “to us it’s just getting started.”

“so, are you still planning on the slow path to valentine’s day?” The Doctor asked his brother.

“yeah I don’t want her first adventure to be the best ever. It would be hard to top that.”

“with what you have planned I don’t think you’ll ever top it.”

“you guys are more than welcome to come.”

“nah let you two be alone. No need to get Rose stuck in the bathroom” they both laughed. “Although she might enjoy the final leg of your tour. We tried once but failed. Why specifically does she want that?”

“don’t know guess I’ll find out in about six weeks.”

“get your girl up Im ready to get out of here.”

            The gang arrived at the Tardis. Lilly went in last. “I’ve seen it before sorry” Rose and The Doctor were bummed. “oh all right shall I say the same thing Jamie?”

“yes, it was the best”

“holy canaries batman! It is bigger on the inside!” all four of them laughed. “Come on love let’s find your room.” James took her hand. “of course, you can stay with me but you get your own room for when I get annoying.” He held her hand and the Tardis flashed a light over a door. There was a picture of a genie bottle. “what? What’s with the bottle?” he asked the Tardis.

“bottle?” Lilly asked.

“yeah it looks…” Lilly looked and her eyes got big as she looked at James. “so…she’s in my head, right?”

“yeah”

“which means she knows some of my silly dreams”

“yeah”

“eeeek!!!” Lilly bounced up and down excited.

“what?” he smiled at her. She was so excited and opened the door. She squealed like a little girl, ran over to the couch and jumped up and down. James stood there dumbfounded. “is this what your room looks like at home? That’s usually what she does.” Lilly ran over and literally jumped in his arms causing him to lose his balance a little. “I LOVE YOU!” kiss “I love you!” kiss “I love you!” she ran over and flopped on the couch with all the pillows. “after all of the horrible memories I had to show finally a sweet dream came true!” James ran his hand behind his neck. “um sweetheart I’m glad you like it but” he looked around “this…this isn’t like you.”

“oh, but it is Jamie it is! Come here” he went to the purple couch. It circles around the oval shape of the room. There were candles, a picture of the two of them a mirror, a notebook. The walls are grey but they have arches all colored gold with sparkling gems and jewels on the wall. There was also a purple and gold genie bottle. “when I was a kid I used to watch reruns of this show called _I Dream Of Jeannie_. I loved the inside of Jeannie’s bottle. I always wanted a room like that but never got one until now!” she leaned over and kissed the Tardis. “oh, sweet pea you are my hero!” Lilly squealed. The smile on her face couldn’t get any bigger if she tried. “you play your cards right and I might dress up as Jeannie for you” she winked and laid back. James was happy for her but confused. “you have no idea, do you?”

“no…I do…I ... not a clue sorry”

“alright love I know there’s a tv in here somewhere. Rose talked about watching our detective.” She held out her hand. “come on” he took her hand and they went to the media room. The Tardis, or sweet pea, as Lilly called her, had it all cued up. They originally were only going to watch one episode but before they knew it they were laughing through the whole first season. “yes, Lilly I will play my cards right because you would look hot in that outfit!” they ate dinner and instead of going on an adventure team Tardis spent the new year watching Jeannie and the major.

            It was getting late and Lilly was thankful the entire day The Doctor kind of was busy. He never mentioned anything. Rose went to bed and he came over and kissed her cheek. “now you two behave and I’ll make sure to lock the door” he whispered and winked at her. He laughed as she sunk down in the chair next to James. “I hope to god Rose doesn’t know. Its mortifying enough for me I can imagine for her”

“she doesn’t and it will stay that way”

“good and I’m sorry” The Doctor looked at his brother.

“don’t be it was some of my best work” he laughed as Lilly squealed in embarrassment his brother sprayed his tea everywhere. “goodnight!” he walked out of the room.

“well sweetheart I’m going to bed” he kissed her. “you have your room but mine is next door if you can’t sleep come join your master” he winked.

“master my ass” she laughed and playfully hit him. He went to his room. Lilly sat there for a few minutes. She went to her room. There was a canopy bed complete with curtains all around. It was a round bed with lots of pillows. There were windows all around. She changed into pair of plaid pajama pants and a tee shirt. She laid on the bed. It was so comfortable. She held her bear. She closed her eyes and turned over. She was expecting to snuggle up to James like she has the past four days. “Ugg” she laid there. She didn’t want to get up but the more she laid there the more she missed him. She hit her head against the pillow a few times then gave up.

            Lilly’s feet hit the floor. She noticed the fireplace and a blue plush carpet. She smiled as she remembered laying against him next to the fireplace last night. She didn’t want to disturb him but she really wanted to be with him. She opened the door and walked next door. She knocked on it and didn’t hear a response. “is he asleep sweet pea?” she thought to the Tardis. She got a soft hum that she interpreted as a yes. Lilly smiled and went back to her room. It was locked. Then a light shined over James room. She opened the door. He was laying in bed in his tee shirt and shorts like always. She smiled at him and sat in the chair. She watched him sleep for a little while then he started tossing and turning. She leaned over and kissed his head. A smile came across his face. “scoot over love” she whispered then crawled in next to him. He turned over and wrapped his arm around her. “there’s my girl” he kissed her head.

“go back to sleep” she whispered and assumed her normal position. As soon as she did they both fell asleep.

            Over the next few days the team saw the signing of the declaration of independence, the French revolution, helped save the future queen of planet Zinio and barely escaped getting killed by hybrid saber tooth tiger human hybrid from the plane Lazarian. They were laughing and catching their breath as they entered the Tardis. “I don’t even want to know what trouble you have coughed up for us next” Lilly laughed.

“that’s the fun of it you never know what you’re going to get” they did agree thought they needed a break. They went into the vortex for a while to relax.

            Lilly hung out in her room. she was always enjoying writing in her notebook. James messed with things in the Tardis. Rose was watching a season of one of her favorite shows and The Doctor was in the library. They loved hanging out together but at the same time they needed a break. A favorite pastime of the girls was to go to the wardrobe and try on different clothes. Then they would laugh and come up with outfits they’d like to see their boys wear. One of them for Lilly was a tight white suit with a red tie and red pin stripes. “damn I bet Jamie would look hot in this!” Lilly grinned. “I’m going to have to come up with something to do to get him into this” she laughed. The boys were fond of wearing their suits when they were going on adventures. During their private time, they would dress down and wear shirt and jeans. Whatever they wore both ladies found the both extremely handsome. Lilly was like Roses’ big sister. Rose was like a little sister to Lilly. There was an age difference of about 10 years but they got along like best friends. They talked about everything even personal things. Rose helped Lilly deal with her questions about intimacy with James and Lilly helped Rose with some issues she had about The Doctor. They also had a girls’ night where they sat in the media room and watched girly movies and did their nails and hair.

            Lilly would write each day in her notebook of her adventures on the Tardis. It was cathartic. In case something heaven forbid did happen she didn’t want to forget anything. She was writing away when there was a knock on her door. “come in” she kept writing away. A banana daiquiri appeared before her. “aw thank you!” she patted the seat next to her for him to sit down. “sorry I was bored and I miss my little tiger” he kissed her cheek.

“I missed you too” she kissed him.

“why don’t we go somewhere there’s a beach and we can go swimming just eth two of us”

“you don’t want to see me in a swimsuit” she laughed.

“oh, you’d be surprised” he laughed and tickled her side. She jumped like she always did. She tickled him back and they played and fought like they always do. “come on lay down here by the fireplace with me” she took his hand and they made their way over. “ya know why sweet pea put this in here?”

“why?”

“because one of my favorite memories is us by the fireplace after we got home from the wedding.”

“I remember that” he brushed his fingers along her forehead gently. “I’ve had so much fun with you guys. It’s absolutely more than I could ever expect.”

“you’re not wanting to go home are you?” he asked worriedly.

“no! no…no I just wanted to tell you. Sometimes I get a little sensory overload so that’s why I come in here to decompress. When it gets too bad and I get too scared or feel a panic attack coming on I hide in my closet.”

“it does also do us good to have our own time. Sweet heart if you feel you’re having a panic attack you can get me. I’ll help you through it. I’ll help you through anything. I hope you know that. There’s’ nothing you can do or say to make me stop loving you Lilliana.” He looked at her sweetly. She smiled and hugged him tightly. “Jamie will you just hold me?” she started feeling a little insecure. He wrapped his arms around her tightly. “what’s wrong love?”

“nothing I just…I just need you now”

“I’m here for you” he squeezed her. “if you don’t want to go to the beach do you want to go skiing some place?”

“I can go to the beach. It sounds nice I just…I’m not big on swimsuits. I’m very self-conscious.”

“why? You have a great body Lilly. You should show it off. You’re very sexy and beautiful. Most women would kill to look like you.” He was being honest and it made Lilly feel so good. “you shouldn’t hide your looks Lils. You’re beautiful in that dress you wore just as you are beautiful in these pajamas.”

“I just…after everything I have been through showing my body just kind of scares me. it makes me feel uncomfortable. I don’t see myself as beautiful or sexy or anything. In my head, I’m still that scared little girl I guess. I just don’t have confidence in things like that. I don’t know it’s stupid.”

“no, its not sweetheart. If you don’t feel comfortable doing something then don’t. I won’t ever ask you to do anything you don’t feel comfortable doing. I want you to remember that.”

“I appreciate it and you know you’re always welcome in here. You don’t have to bribe me with a daiquiri either” she giggled. “although I have to say I do enjoy them and appreciate them.”

“that’s why I make them Lils I know you like them. I like seeing the smile on your face”

“it reminds me of the night we first met again. That is one of my favorite memories. You were so handsome in that blue suit” she smiled. “believe me it caught my eye from the stage. I was so glad when Jack texted me and told me Rose was with your brother and you were free. Not that I was going to do anything I’m too big of a chicken for that” she laughed.

“I’ll have to wear that suit again” he kissed her head.

“actually, there is a white suit in the wardrobe I’ve been trying to think of a reason to get you to wear. I think you’d look hot in it. I told sweet pea so hopefully she’ll work something out” she looked up at him. “conspiring with my ship I see?”

“of course, love us girls have to stay together” she kissed his cheek.

“well let me go check it out and I’ll conjure up something for us to do” he chuckled and went to get up. She grabbed on to him. “no don’t go please not yet” he looked at her. She looked like she was scared to let him go. “what’s wrong love?”

“I just…I…I need you for a few more minutes” he sat back down. “I … I hope I can do this.”

“do what?”

“I … there’s one more monster Jamie I haven’t shown you. I haven’t shown anyone. To be honest I don’t know if I can even do it.”

“what happened Lilly?” she closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his neck. He held her giving her the strength to go on. She started trembling. She could feel an attack coming on. “never mind I … I can’t do it…you can do what you were going to” she let go and got up. “I … I…I need to be alone” she stood up and her back was to him. She didn’t hear him get up. She was fighting the tears. “Lilly I’m not leaving. You can do what you need to do but I’m not leaving you.”

“Jamie…”

“no, it’s not going to work. Come here and sit down and tell me what you need to tell me. I promise Lils everything will be ok.”

“I…I…” she started shaking. She felt his jacket around her arms. he wrapped his arms around her and squeezed her tight. “come on love tell me.”

“let’s go in here” she pointed to her closet. She led him into her inner sanctuary. The Tardis even knew how things were when she lived at home. She had a closet. It was a huge closet with a secret hiding place. She had a mattress in there. Lilly squeezed James’ hand as she led him in there. They sat down on the mattress. Their backs were touching the wall. The light was on but very dim. Lilly touched the wall to turn the light off. She sat close to James. She held a pillow and wouldn’t let go of it for dear life. “when I was a kid the closet was my hiding spot. No monsters got in there. I literally hid in there for three days one time to keep them away. That’s why this is in here.” She couldn’t see him it was dark but she managed to sit in front of him and sit on his lap. He wrapped his arms around her holding her tight as she trembled. “sweetheart nothing is going to get you in here. Do you think sweet pea is really going to let someone hurt her favorite Martian’s best girl?” he chuckled. She smiled and laid her head back. She was still trembling. “tell me love what has you so upset. Whatever it is I can help I promise.” she laid her head on his shoulder. She took his hand and placed it on her collar bone and gently put it over towards her bra strap. He touched the scar tissue. “one day I was at home. One of Eddie’s friend came over. I didn’t lock the door. I always lock the door at home but I didn’t. his name was mark. He was drunk. He let himself in.” she paused and caught her breath. She moved his hand over to the other scar just to the left of her rib cage to the top of her breast. “Lilly” he said softly. “what happened sweetheart?” she wrapped her arms around his neck like a scared little girl. She started crying. James gently took his hand and wiped the tears away. “he knew what Eddie would do. He was one of the participants. He chased me into my room. I tried to get out the window but he caught me. he beat me. he threw me down on the bed and raped me. he tried to choke me. I reached over to the drawer while he was raping me for the third time. He saw the knife Eddie kept in the drawer to keep me inline. He grabbed it before I could.” She was feeling strong and confident now. She told him about her past demons. She felt the rage building up in him. He was trembling with anger. He was never one to swear but he used a few choice words. “I swear Lilly I want to go and make them all pay for what they did to you! I don’t care what happens! Let the universe implode there’s no reason no reason at all for anyone to do that to another person!” he was so angry Lilly felt his heart rate go up. She wiped her eyes. “it’s ok love I’m ok. I’m here with you now. I survived. I’m a survivor. Anyway, you’re right. I … I tend to hide behind things. I’m not going do that anymore.” She took off her shirt. She sat there on his lap. She touched the wall making the light come on very low however he could still see. “this…this is what he did to me. I am not going to let that evil bastard have any more control over me. if I want to wear a bathing suit and go swimming I am going to do it.” She took his hand and traced all three scars that were around where her heart was. “thank god his aim was horrible or else I might not be here.” James looked at her. He grabbed her and held her as close to him as he could. He was trying to be strong but it was breaking his heart. “I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry Lilly you had to go through all of this.” He cradled her in his arms. his resolve broke down and he was in tears. She held him close now. “it’s ok love. It’s ok. He’ll never hurt me again.”

“damn bloody hell he won’t! Not if I get my hands on him.”

“I know you guys don’t like guns and violence and things but before I blacked out, please don’t hate me for this, I took the gun I had under my pillow. I shot him in the head before he could stab me again. Next thing I knew I was in the hospital with tubes everywhere. I’m sorry Jamie I was so scared he was going to kill me.” she started bawling like a baby.

“oh, baby I don’t blame you at all. You were defending yourself.” He rocked her back and forth. Both in tears even the Tardis gave a mournful hum as she turned off the lights. Next to them a blanket appeared and he covered them up in it. “I’m so ashamed of everything. That’s why no one sees me in a swim suit or anything I… I’m afraid if I do anything someone’s coming after.”

“not as long as there is a breath in my body they won’t”

“I’m sorry I’m such a crazy case”

“Lilly remember the whole circle thing you talked about? We are supposed to be together. Maybe because we’re two crazy cases fit for each other” he chuckled. “I mean think about it I’m only here because my brother’s vanity. It doesn’t get much crazier than that” he chuckled. Lilly thought about it and started giggling. “thanks for coming to my rescue again my prince charming” she kissed his cheek. “oh, my queen I’ll always come to your rescue. I might even cause some havoc just so I can come to your rescue” he laughed. She started lightening up.

“you know somehow I can see that happening. I think now you know everything about me. I’m sure there’s something crazy I haven’t told you but I can’t think of it now” she laughed.

“ya know I think we should take all of our baggage write it down and just toss it out? tomorrow’s valentine’s day. We can start fresh you and me. no more psycho fathers no more time war we’ll just be two people starting fresh how’s that?”

“that sounds good” she sniffled. “I do have a favor to ask if it’s not too much trouble.”

“if I can do it sweetheart I will”

“is there anyway we can go back and see when we first met? I know not to touch myself wait that sounded wrong” she started laughing “and things but I was wondering.”

Oh, Lils that’s a big one”

“no, its ok

“no, I just don’t want anything to mess us up for now”

“I know it’s no big deal.” He saw the look on her face. He knew better than to ask.

“let me see if there’s anything I can do”

“no sweetheart its ok” she put her shirt back on. “ya know I’m hungry let’s get something to eat” she got up and held her hand out for him. She was doing it again. He knew if something didn’t go her way she’d try and brush it off like no big deal when it hurt her badly. He could see it in her eyes and she was doing it again. This was obviously for some reason something she really wanted to do.

            They all had dinner together as they usually did. James noticed Lilly was trying to be social able but it was coming off forced. After dinner, they watched tv but she was a million miles away. “I have some things to do. Go ahead and go to bed love I’ll join you later” she kissed him and walked away. Rose went to bed so that left the twins. “what’s wrong?”

“what do you mean?”

“Lilly she’s not been herself tonight. Did you two get into it?”  
“no” he sighed “she wants to go back to when we met”  
“why?”  
“I don’t know” he sighed

“what did you tell her?”

“that I couldn’t”

“why”

“I just…”

“you don’t want her seeing him again”

“do you want Rose to?”

“touché”

“I just…I … I wonder why? Why is it so important?”

“I don’t know. She does know we’re still the same, right?”

“yeah she understands the whole regeneration thing.”

“you’re going to do it aren’t you”

“we get visits before”

“yeah do you want me to go with you”

“I don’t know I’ll probably stay outside and see if the memory changes.”

“she knows the rules, right?”

“yeah she understands. I’m just worried somethings going to happen to split us up now” he sighed. “nothing’s going to happen. She probably just wants to tell him something I don’t know.

Alright then October 21 Los Angeles California.” The Doctor left to set the controls.

            James went to Lilly’s room. “come in” she said to his knock. He walked in and she was finishing up writing something. “hey, love I know you’re tired but uh I have a surprise for you if you’re up to it.” She smiled at him. He could tell she’d been crying. “sorry I was just working on my baggage” she showed him some paper. “you know what I think I would like to go to the beach with you”

“really?” he smiled big

“yeah I think it’s time to stop letting my past beat me up. I’m a tough cookie because of it but its ruled my life for too long. So, au revoir past life” she laughed. He smiled at her “I wonder if the Tardis can get me another one of these bottles? They are so pretty” she stuffed the papers in it. “I want to throw this in the ocean.”

“well I have just the ocean for it!” he got her jacket. “here you’ll need this! Come on!” he grabbed her hand. “where are we going?’

“to the ocean love” he kissed her nose and pulled her out of the Tardis. She looked around. “this…this looks like”

“aw yes looks like were in Los Angeles judging by the hairs styles I’d say late 80s. oh look over here” he pointed at some random thing while watching her. She picked up on where they were right away. “I was feeling a bit rebellious” he squeezed her hand. “make sure you don’t do anything to alter our timelines”

“I…I…I don’t know what to say”

“I do one banana milkshake please” she chuckled at him.

“yeah I’ll get us one”

“I’m going to stay out here but if you need anything come get this me” he kissed her. “I know he would have wanted to do that if he wasn’t so tore up”

“my hero” she smiled and walked inside.

            When she went in she saw herself sitting at the booth laughing with him. She smiled it must have been about Barcelona. That was what made her laugh the most. She waited till her younger self went to the bathroom then she went up to him. “hi” she smiled. He looked puzzled at first but recognized her. “angel?” his eyes got big.

“yeah um John” she smiled.

“what…how…?”

“let’s just say I have a friend who can make things happen”

“but you’re in the future”

“20 years…I just…I just wanted to tell you what you did for me well her it changed my life in so many ways. I’ve already told you this but I wanted to tell this version of you thank you. ”

“so… we meet again?”

“yeah” she smiled “you become one of my best friends. I never forgot you and I still wear this all the time”

“I give you my jacket?”

“yeah and you write me a letter that keeps me going. Those two things are my most prized possessions in the world. Your ‘dream’ about Barcelona sticks with me too. You’ll be happy well here I come.” She kissed him. “Thanks, my leather angel” she got her milkshake and left. He was standing outside in the Tardis doorway when she came out. she heard the door open and saw James look up. She turned around and saw the one she was just talking to. He came up to her and kissed her. “thank you” and walked away. Lilly looked at James. “that’s not going to change anything is it?” James smiled at her and winked. “come on tell me”

“no, its just a nice memory I have”

“thank you love and for the record this version of you is a better kisser” she giggled. “alright beach time”

“nah let’s get some rest. I have huge plans for us tomorrow.”

“really? What’s so special about tomorrow?”

“it’s valentine’s day love!” he grabbed her hand and went into the vortex and then they went to sleep.


	14. Chapter 14 – Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's finally valentines day. we get to see what james (the meta-crisis doctor) has planned for lilly.

Chapter 14 – Later

 

          A couple days before, James went into the media room and Lilly was in there with Rose. She was holding her bear he got her. She didn’t know he was in there. “God he’s so handsome” he heard Lilly say to Rose. “Absolutely the sexiest man to ever live, ever. Fifties or seventies I think he was just as handsome in the early seventies.” James could see Lilly was in her own world. He stood there while he listened to the girls talk. “The Doctor wouldn’t take me to the seventies to see him said to go see him in the fifties.”

“The Doctor doesn’t know what he’s talking about” Lilly laughed. He watched Lilly turn into a teenage girl and practically squeal. Rose started laughing at her. “Sorry this is my favorite movie and it’s a documentary about him. I remember being a little kid when this came out. My aunt got me a velvet shirt two of them pink and blue. She asked me which one I wanted to wear. I said blue because it was Elvis’ favorite color. I didn’t know at the time that it wasn’t” she laughed.

“You ought to have The Doctor take you to meet him.”

“Honestly I don’t know if I could. I literally would not be able to speak. You have no idea Rose how that man has affected my life.” He watched them for a while then couldn’t take anymore. He was kind of getting a little jealous. “What are you watching?” He came and sat by Lilly. He saw the big smile on her face. She reached her hand out for him. He took it and sat next to her. She snuggled up to him. “This is a movie about the biggest hero in my life.”

“What did the paparazzi get a video of me?” he giggled.

“Give them time and they will” she laughed and kissed his cheek. He had no intention of watching this. He knew the basics but he got caught up in it. It also didn’t hurt that Lilly would squeal and squeeze his hand. “I was a little, little baby when he died. I grew up on his movies and music. I seriously think that’s where my hair fetish has come from” she laughed and looked at James and ran her fingers through his hair. He didn’t mind it at all. James learned all about his life, his wife, divorce, child and death. He also learned about one of his surprises for Lilly. He saw how she reacted when they showed it. She didn’t care that James was in the room. She was having a moment. James had to admit he was very handsome and couldn’t wait for Valentine’s Day to come so he can give her his gift. When it got to a certain point and they were playing a certain song Lilly started bawling like a baby. She held on to her bear and then held on to James. “I can’t believe I’m crying at this. I’ve never done this before.” He kissed her head. Then they showed his funeral procession. She really started crying then. James really saw how much he meant to her. He couldn’t wait for his Valentine’s Day gift.

          Valentine’s Day finally arrived. He had a lot of plans for her. He was excited. He had looked forward to this day for a long time. He got a shower and made them some breakfast. He knew Americans especially southerners liked a big breakfast on occasion. The Tardis helped him make Lilly’s favorites. When it was done he went bouncing in the room. She was just waking up. Her hair was all over the place. Her shirt was disheveled and she looked like she was half out of it but to James she looked every bit the queen she was to him. He bounced on the bed gave her a peck on the lips and sat next to her. “What has gotten into you?” she laughed. She wasn’t the best in the morning but today she was ok.  “It’s the day dedicated to love. I have my queen next to me so what more do I need?” He smiled big. She laughed he was so happy. “I love it when you call me your queen. I’m everyone else’s princess but to you I am your queen. It makes me feel like Cinderella” she giggled and James saw her act like she did a couple days ago. It felt good that it was about him this time. “Love you don’t need a glass slipper to make you my queen.” She hugged him tight. “But what you do need is food. So, a queen gets breakfast in bed.” He handed her the tray.

“Oh my God!” she gasped. Her hands went to her mouth and she looked at him with tears in her eyes. He wasn’t expecting that. “You did this?”

“Well yeah and with a little help from Sweet Pea” he winked.

“Did you eat?”

“No, I’m not hungry.”

“Oh no your Lordship. Sit here and help me eat.”

“I don’t know if I can that’s grits”

“Yeah I don’t eat grits” she laughed “but here have some sausage and have a biscuit. That’s a biscuit. What you guys call a biscuit we call cookies my little cookie” she laughed. He helped her eat her biscuits and gravy and eggs and toast. “You even have Smuckers grape jelly my favorite! You know how we are with bananas? Well you my love are my top grape” she bopped him on the nose. “This…this…this is awesome! I haven’t had a bit of home in ages.”

“And this is just breakfast!” he chuckled “wait till you see what else I have planned. So, do you still want to go to the beach?”

“Yeah I’ll anywhere with you hot stuff.”

“Well get dress and we’ll go to the beach.” He left her to herself. He went back and fixed it so they’d land on the correct planet at 12 am. This way he essentially restarted Valentine’s Day. Rose and his brother were off on their favorite place so all it was were him and his girl. “Ok cutie something I have to tell you. Us Irish girls burn so I hope you have a lot of sunscreen.” She came out in a modest suit that was a halter top and a pair of short shorts, large brim hat and sunglasses. He smiled big at her. He had a moment himself.  “Oh no love if I’m wearing a swim suit the suit has to go. Come on as sexy as I think you are in this suit you need to get on some different clothes.” She pulled him into his room. He turned and smiled at her. “You think I’m sexy” he took off her glasses. He wanted to see her face when he said that. Sure enough he got the blush he was expecting but he also got a devilish smirk and twinkle in her eye. “Love there’s a reason I don’t let you read my mind” she winked and walked away. He ran up behind her “you’re going to be the death of me flirting with me like that” he whispered in her ear from behind.  She spun around, grabbed him by the lapels, and brought him closer. “Imagine when it’s not flirting then.” She smiled and walked away leaving him standing there really thinking about forgetting his plans going up to her throwing her over his should and bring her back to show her who’s boss. Instead he gulped turned around and focuses himself. Finally, he was able to get some swim trunks and tank top, sunglasses, sunscreen and ran to his queen. He didn’t have to read her mind. He saw that cheesy grin and her bite her lip when she saw him. He could almost read the devilish thoughts going through her head. Now he was glad he watched that movie with her. He was getting some of the same looks to him that she was when she was watching Elvis. _Looks like I’m right up there_ he laughed to himself.

          They walked on the pink sandy beaches of planet Nashua. “So, this sun should be ok for humans so no burning my Irish queen.” It really wasn’t harmful at all but he got the sunscreen anyway. “However, one can never be too sure” he smiled and put some on his hand and rubbed his legs. She was doing the same and it was driving him crazy. He kept staring at her and she knew it. He could see the evil grin she was giving him. She kept it up just to get under his skin. He loved it when she flirted with him.  “Here put some on my back” she smiled at him. It was an evil seductive grin. She knew how to play him and boy was he loving it. “My queen are you trying to seduce me?” He laughed at her just to get a response. He may be half Time Lord but he’s still male. “Is it working?”

“Oh yes!” he laughed.

“Then good” she grinned at him.

“Are you going to take this necklace off?”

“Never! You gave it to me so I wear it all the time.” She pulled her hair away. He put the sunscreen on the parts that were actually exposed which were just her shoulders and some of her back. “That feels good” she giggled turning her head towards him. “You’re telling me” he flirted back and kissed her neck just below her ear. “That feels better” he whispered. She took the sunscreen from him and returned the favor. “Don’t let my sweet and innocent goody two shows persona fool you. Underneath I’m still a woman.” She kissed his ear. “And even better I’m a doctor that knows all about the nerves” she kissed him on a really sensitive spot. “So I know just the right places to do just the right things.” She took her finger and traced a line on an even more sensitive spot. Then she laughed an evil laugh in his ear as she kissed it. He gulped. She was right. She really did know how to get him.  Then all of a sudden as if doing an about face she was back to being goody two shoes “ok love lets go swimming.” She threw the sunscreen on the beach, took off her hat and pulled him towards the water. It was a good thing the water was cold. James was now in for it. She was playing him. They laughed and splashed and played. They had lunch and laid on the beach under the sun. “This is the best Valentine’s Day I’ve ever had. Thank you” she said sweetly. He smiled at her. “Really Lils this was an added bonus. The rest of my plan is yet to come.” He waggled his eyebrows at her. She laughed at him. “Whatever you put in that breakfast to make both of us this flirty you need to do it again” she laughed. “I like it when you flirt and act silly with me.”

“I do it all the time”

“No, this time it’s’ different”

“It’s because you’re flirting back and enjoying it.” He bopped her on the nose. She tickled him and he rolled over on his back with her on top. He looked into her eyes. He saw that devilish look of want and desire. He saw his tiger lily wanting to come out. He loved that look. He tickled her and rolled over on top of her. “Later” he whispered as he kissed the spot he knew would get her going. She pushed him away. “Promise?” she smiled big.

“Oh yeah” he bopped her on the nose. That was his new thing. “Well then pretty boy I’ll have to enjoy the rest of the day teasing you” she bopped him back.

“Yeah but you have to catch me first” he took off running. She ran after him. She jumped on his back and ran piggy back for a few feet. “I hate to see you leave but I love to watch you go” she laughed in his ear. They fell on the sand laughing at each other.

 

          After dinner, they went back to the Tardis arm in arm laughing. “I think I have sand in places I never knew existed.” She was in her bathroom in her Jeannie room. “Well I can examine and make sure we get it all out” he was going for shock value.  “Ya know being a doctor and all” he got it with her mouth hanging open. He had this devilish laugh as he looked over at her. She bit her lip and looked at him like she was checking him out. “Later”

“Promise”

“Oh yeah” she bopped him on the nose. He grabbed her and pulled her close. “Come here you” he kissed her. “I will not let you have the upper hand” he gave her a passionate kiss. “Save some of that for later”

“Oh, I have plenty more where that came from.”

“Oh, me to” she threw him out of the bathroom. “Take a cold shower” she yelled behind the door. He was going to say something but remembered what her father did. She opened the door, “what no witty comebacks?” she looked surprised.

“Yeah” he walked up to her “later” he closed the door and left.

          He left a note on her bed next to an outfit he liked to see her in. “I’m grateful this time my ears aren’t as big” he didn’t know if she’d get it but he left her jacket, a Motley Crue shirt, and instead of the hot pants he got black leather pants and army boots. He even set the wig out for her but he did put a note it was optional. He went back and restarted the day. This time destination was a planet he’d never been too but it was a special occasion. The Tardis gave the sad news they couldn’t leave beyond a few feet because of air but it was a wish he was willing to give. He changed his clothes and knocked on her door. “If you know what’s good for you, you’ll get in here now!” that was different. She stood there her hands on her hips looking sassy as ever. “Well I … I didn’t know if…” she threw him up against the wall. “Uh sorry?” he gulped. She had on black eyeliner dark eyeshadow, bright red lips. Black hair with red streaks “so the truth comes out finally doesn’t it, love.” She had him by the lapels. She furrowed her brow at him. _Damn she’s looking hot and sexy_. He was not sure if he should be scared or turned on but he was definitely turned on. He looked in her eyes for a clue. He saw the tiger in them. Finally, she winked at him. “You look like the bad girls, don’t you? All this time you’ve had sweet, scared, shy little Lilly but what you want what you really wanted was Angel Rayne wasn’t it?” he gulped. “Yeah it’s always the good guys that want the bad girls. Well ya know what love” she kissed him so passionately he forgot where he was even at, “later” she winked and walked away. He slid down the wall and sat there for a second getting his bearings. “What the hell was that?” He said out loud.

“That was me going ahead in our little game so love where are we going to now?” She helped him up. He looked at her. She had the wig in her hand. “Wig yay or nay? I’m not sure” all he could do is lunge for her and kiss her again. He was very competitive and dragged her over to her bed. He was kissing her passionately and almost gave in to his wants and her tiger instincts. When he had her where he wanted her, he got up “later” he winked. She growled at him and threw a pillow. “Damn you!” He laughed at her and walked out. She was definitely wanting more.

          He was in the control room waiting for her to come in. He knew of another way to get her. She loved it when he wore his glasses. He would always see the silly grin she’d get on her face. She’d try to hide it but she’d even squeal a little bit. He loved teasing her. Finally she came out and wrapped her arms around him. “Aw there’s my love.” He turned around and once again she had the cheesiest smile and that little squeal again. He kissed her on the nose this time and winked at her. “So, you can open the door but we can’t go very far. No oxygen but we can sit here and look.”

“Where are we? When are we?”  
“Still Valentine’s Day as far as where we are take a look” she opened the doors. He stood next to her and watched as she deduced. He loved to watch her figure something out. Her eyes would go everywhere. She’d bite her lip to one side, and he could practically see her thinking. “It looks…looks…” _3…2…1…”_ Oh my God!” _She’s figured it out._  He smiled at her. She looked at him with big, huge blue eyes. “Are we?” He just smiled and beamed at her with pride. This was what he wanted. He wanted to make her dreams, however silly or large to come true. “We’re really on Pluto?”

“We really are. First time for me as well. Told you I was saving it for a special occasion.” She was getting emotional. “I … I … I can’t believe I’m on Pluto. I can’t believe you even remembered some stupid comment I made about picking a planet different from Mars. I just picked Pluto randomly because I thought of Mickey Mouse and the dog. You brought me to Pluto!” She wiped her eyes. She reached around and hugged him. She held on to him tight. “Ya know Jamie, it’s getting really hard to wait for later” she laughed.

“Oh, and to remember the occasion here” he gave her a stuffed Pluto dog with Mickey Mouse. She squeezed it and then laid her head on his shoulder. “I don’t have a clue what to get you for Valentine’s Day” she laughed.

“Lilly you’ve given me everything I could ask for all I need in the universe is a hand to hold. You’ve given me your hand.” She actually crawled on his lap and held on to him. She started crying. “That’s…that’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever said.”

“It’s true though. When you’re scared, happy or sad what do you want? A hand to hold. I have mine. That’s all I need.” She looked him dead in the eyes. “You win” she smiled. “I could never top that.” He brushed her hair away from her eyes. His fingertips were on the apple of her right cheek. “Shall we start round two?” he winked. “Oh yeah” she laughed.

They sat there for a few minutes enjoying Pluto. James was enjoying holding Lilly in his arms. She was still on his lap. Her head was against his right shoulder. “Holding you like this Lilly it’s all I need for Valentine’s Day”.

“James, I don’t know if I’ve told you today or when the last time I told you but I love you. I really and truly love you. You have no idea how much this means to me. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.”

“You are welcome my Queen you are welcome.” They sat there for a while just holding each other. It felt so good. They didn’t need to flirt with each other as much as they liked it. This was just as intimate as whatever may happen later.

          After a few more moments the Tardis gave its alert. They needed to leave because of the oxygen levels. “Ok time to move on to the next part of our trip.”

“Where are we going? She smiled big at him.

“Oh my queen the king awaits” he winked. “See I have a conundrum. I love that word conundrum”

“What”

“One place I want to take you you’ll love. We have to get my brother and Rose. They’re coming with us to that one. I don’t know if I’ll get you to go anyplace else with me” he laughed “but the other place has the outfit I’d like to see you in last.”

“What’s the issue?”

“I’m afraid you’ll be on such a high that later may come before I’m ready” he laughed. “Or you may not be up to going to the last place.”

“Ok how about this. If Rose and Doc are coming with us are we going to drop them off? If not then we’ll do that last because when later comes I don’t want anyone else around.”

“Well drop them back off.”

“Ok well by that time I should be calmed down enough. Where are you taking me that I’d get so stoked?”

“Aww my queen I’m still debating if I should make it the encore or not. My suspicious mind thinks you’ll still be all shook up to go to the final place.” _There’s three references I wonder if she’s picked up yet._ “Can’t I wear the outfit to both?”

“No, I have another outfit in mind. But I know how you like my…ok it’s settled I know what we’re doing.”

“What are we doing?”

“Getting Rose and my brother.” Before long all of team Tardis was back. “Now girls your outfits are ready.”

“Wait you’re picking out my outfit again?”

“I saw what you picked out for me so don’t start” he laughed at her. Lilly went to her room. “She has no clue, does she?” The Doctor asked his brother.

“None and she about had a meltdown on Pluto. I can only imagine this one!”

          As he did all day he knocked on her door. “Come in” he saw her dress in a baby blue go go dress from the 60s. She had on a pair of white go go boots and her hair in a beehive. “This looks better than I imagined. God, you look hot” she grinned. “And believe me you don’t want to see my imagination. I’m trying to hold off on later.” She blushed at him.

“Dare I say it I feel kinda sexy” she laughed and giggled a shy giggle and put her hands to her mouth.

“Well you should because you are” he took her hand and twirled her around. He whistled at her and growled like a tiger. She giggled and turned bright red. “My turn you are not wearing that! Come on Sweet Peas granted your wish now it’s mine. I finally get to see you in this.” She took him to his room. She opened the closet and pulled out the suit she’s been dying to get him in. She put it up against him and squealed. “Yes, I was right you are going to look damn hot in this. Probably be the sexiest man there. Well you will be because you’re the sexiest mana live” she smiled and kissed him.

“Well I think I’ll have competition tonight” he smiled at her.

“Oh my love the only competition you’d have has been dead for years” she laughed. He smiled at her. _Apparently, she’s forgot this is a time machine. Oh, this is even better than I thought._ “Go on get dressed. I’ve calmed myself down so I won’t be all over you…well maybe not” she laughed and walked away.

          He took the suit and sat down on the bed. He was laughing as he was getting dressed. He sat on something. He turned around it was a stethoscope. There was a note on the bed with the stethoscope. The note only had one word later. He laughed at her and smiled. He loved this playful teasing banter they had today. He put the pants on they were tight but they fit. He put the shirt on and the red tie. There was a vest and he buttoned it all the way up and tightened the tie. He put the white jacket on and the Tardis hid his chucks so he had to wear dress shoes. He went to style his hair. The Tardis showed him a picture of him and Lilly. His hair was a little flatter and had bangs off to the right side. It was like it was when he first regenerated into this body and took Rose home for Christmas. “This is how she likes it ole girl?” A flash of light confirming yes came through so that’s how he styled it. Then he went to meet his queen. She was fulling with the hem of her dress when he saw her. Rose saw him first and smiled. She pointed towards him and Lilly turned around. The look on her face said it all. She jumped back and held on to her chest like her heart was going to come out. He waved to her. She came up to him. “Now this! This looks better than I imagined.” She smiled. “It’s definitely a good thing you have Rose and your brother because I tell you what later would be right now” she laughed. “I’ll have to sit between your brother and Rose to keep my hands off you” she laughed.

“Oh believe me love I don’t mind put your hands wherever you want” he chuckled in her ear. She reached up and kissed him like a ravenous tiger. It was like when Cassandra kissed him in Roses’ body. She was breathless afterward and he just had a dumfounded look. She looked him up and down. She spun him around. “Told you Rose perfect fit” she hit him on the butt. James jumped surprised but liked it. She saw how he styled his hair she giggled “I was told you prefer this” he pointed to his hair. “I do” she smiled. “Believe me later it will be back to like you always wear it. With a little help from me” she gave him an exaggerated wink.

“I’ve been waiting forever for this trip. I was going to make it your first but I thought then nothing could top this. So, I waited for it to be Valentine’s Day. Believe it or not I took the slow path for Valentine’s Day too” he smiled at her.

“You are killing me! What’s so special about this trip?”

“I want to tell you but it would ruin the surprise.”

“Have you been there before?”

“Oh yeah but never to this one specific event” he grinned at her. He was enjoying this. “I’ve heard though it’s a really great event. I think you won’t be able to help but fall in love with me all over again” he winked. He was dropping hints right and left. Either she was playing him or she just wasn’t getting it. “You’ll have memories of it forever.” In preparation, he watched a DVD of what they are going to see. James, The Doctor and Rose were all three very impressed. “Come on love we’re here, Los Angeles America in 1967.” This time he purposely said the wrong year. “What happened here? Nothing rings a bell.”

“Lilly stay here. I’ll come back for you” he turned around and chuckled. _That’s my best clue yet_. The Doctor got their tickets and James got Lilly. He held her hand as they made their way through. “Are we in a tv studio? Are we watching Jeannie?” she laughed. “No love but your greatest wish is my command” he winked and bowed to her. “Ya know he looked around. I’m sorry I think he was off a year. It’s June 1968. Oh well I’m sure 67 was a good year” The Doctor informed them. James watched as Lilly looked around. _She’s starting to deduce! I love this part._ She started recognizing things she’s seen a million times. James had a big smile on his face. “There…there…there’s a wh…whi…white stage with red t... t... trim” she was actually stuttering from shock. “Yeah what’s so special about that?” Rose asked innocently. “M…m…my stages have that l…layout for one reason.”

“Why?” James asked. He was trying not to smile. That also wasn’t a detail he knew. “Oh my God” Lilly grabbed her chest. She looked at James. “You said my greatest wish, right?”  
“Yeah” he was trying to not smirk.

“Do...do…do you know what the one thing I’ve always wanted to do since I know we could do it was?”

“What love?”

“See my biggest idol in concert. The…the…the person who taught me how to sing…who taught me what it was to be an entertainer. I…I…I used to dream as a small kid he was my dad because he wouldn’t do those things to me then well when I got older never mind…. HOLY SHIT! You brought me to see the 68 comeback special! I’m…I’m... I need to sit down.” She caught her breath. “How…how…how did you guys know?”  
“Jack asked you a long time ago we got the message. I’m surprised you hadn’t mentioned it before.”

“I thought you guys would have thought I was stupid.” She blushed.

“Lils no love!” James sat next to her.

“I’m so stupid! You were giving me all these clues!” she laughed. “I apologize for my little girl sounds I make.” She nudged him. She hugged him. “I just want you to know if something happened to me this has been the best day ever.”

“Don’t say that love! We’ll have a ton more and we’ve had a quite a few so far.”

“Yeah we have. I couldn’t have asked for a better valentine.”

“Me neither” he kissed her.

          Before they knew it, the lights went down and they started filming. Lilly didn’t get to close. She told James she didn’t want to have a panic attack right there. They watched the bloopers and various things that were cut out. James watched the show but he really watched Lilly. She was the little girl that got a pony for her birthday. The whole time they were there she never took her eyes off the stage. She was mesmerized. He even saw tears running down her cheeks. He saw before him vanish his sexy woman and instead was the little girl that looked up to this man to bring her comfort in the most horrible times. He saw her sing along. He watched her laugh. He watched her get excited. He watched her go through all the emotions one gets when seeing their idol for the first time. No matter what does or doesn’t happen later this was the best part for him. He made her biggest wish come true. He even saw her shaking a little with excitement. She didn’t look at him much once the star of the show came on. He didn’t mind. This is what he wanted. He’s taken plenty of companions to various places, done a lot of things in his 900 years, but this single moment was the best of them all. He saw her be transported back in time to when everything was supposed to be rainbows and kittens. For her though it wasn’t. It was the stuff of evil and nightmares. She reached out and grabbed his hand and held on to it. After a second she turned to him tear stained cheeks and put her hand on his cheek. “I love you with all of my heart.” She kissed him but unlike earlier it wasn’t a passionate kiss. It was a kiss of thankfulness. It was a kiss of tenderness. It truly was a kiss of love. She scooted over closer to him and laid her head on his shoulder. He wrapped his arm around her shoulder. She held his hand and entwined her fingers with his. She wrapped her arm around his waist. She was quiet. She wasn’t the excited girl he brought in here. She was calmed down now.

There was a break in the filming. She looked up at him. “I don’t need him anymore.” She smiled. He looked at her funny. “I have someone else to take away my monsters now” she smiled and kissed him sweetly. “Someone I love with every cell in my body, every nerve in my system. Thank you Doctor for being my one true hero.” She kissed him tenderly. James smiled at her. It wasn’t about the kiss or anything it was partly because she called him by his name not his alias. “You actually called me Doctor.” He smiled at her.

“Well I’ve gotten so used to calling you Jamie. It’s kinda confusing with you and your brother. Truthfully though, it sounds stupid, but I don’t call you that because I don’t want you to think I’m thinking about him. So, I only save it for special occasions. If you prefer me to call you that I will but to me you’ll always be my Jamie. Even if you ever told me your true name, I’d still call you Jamie.”

“Lils one day I hope I can tell you my true name.”

“You can whenever you want to. I know it’s a secret for some reason and I respect that so even though I’m curious as all get out I’ll try to never bug you about it.”

“The only time I’d ever be able to tell you is when I marry you. It’s a thing about Time Lords. It’s an oath a way of bonding with our bond mate.”

“Have you ever told anyone?” he swallowed. He didn’t really want to have this conversation here and now. He looked at her. He kinda worried about how she’d react. “Once” he said softly.  She looked at him and smiled.

“As handsome as you are I’d thought you’d have a half a dozen or so” she chuckled. He smiled at her. “No that’s only this regeneration and for Time Lords marriage is a sacred thing. It literally is till death do you part with your bond mate.”

“Is she gone then?” she asked sadly.

“Yeah she died with the rest of my family and friends on Gallifrey.”

“Oh my God Jamie I’m so sorry” she had tears in her eyes. They never discussed the Time War or anything. “If I had known I wouldn’t have brought it up especially today.”

“What’s so special about today?”

“Valentine’s Day” she smiled.

“Oh” he laughed “yeah that’s only a human thing.”

“I figured as much but still I’m sure…”

“It’s ok.” He gulped. “I have you now.”

“Yes, you do” she smiled. “But sweetheart if you ever want to talk about it I’m more than willing to listen.  I’ll never bother you about it thought. I know how painful it must be for you.”

“Lilly it’s ok”

“I see it in your eyes. The sadness, the loss, the grief. That’s why I do stupid things to get you to laugh. I just hope for a few moments you have a moment to laugh and smile. That’s all I want is to take the hurt and sadness out of your eyes.” He gulped he wasn’t expecting this. “Lilliana, you have no idea how much you make me laugh. You make me feel loved and whole and happy. Don’t for a second ever think you don’t do that. Even when we’re sitting quietly and alone and nothings going on you make me happy. I know I have you and we’re together. Yes, I miss my family terribly but I feel like I get to start over with you. I get to live my life and yet still have the woman of my dreams next to me. I was given a gift and a blessing and I want to share it with you my queen. Thank you though for everything you have ever done for me. You’ve given me my passion back my willing to live you’ve given me my zest and my soul back. Truthfully when Rose didn’t pick me I almost wanted to be left on that beach. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I didn’t want to see them together. Then Jack good ole Jack sent me a video of you. I watched it and it hit me who you were. The Tardis had her little say too. She made me up a room and the bed had lilies on it.” They laughed together. “I questioned her about it and she just would not let me change it. She put your articles next to me and then I finally saw that video from Jack. He was right. I would like you.” He smiled at her big. “Even if you do like pears” he whispered in her ear. She laughed at him. “What’s this video of me that Jack sent you?”

“You are in your office talking to him about things. He asks you about if you could go anywhere and you said here.”

“That’s how you knew?”

“Yeah we’ve known for months now. He asked you where you wanted to go to see if you’d tell us. My brother and Rose knew I had this all planned from the moment you said you’d come travelling with us. I knew though to make it extra special it would be Valentine’s Day. So my Lilliana enjoy the king.” He smiled at her. She had tears in her eyes and kissed him passionately. When she was done she laid her head on his shoulder again. They started the production again and she was that excited little girl all over again.  When it was over he told her, they could go meet him. Psychic paper and all. “I honestly don’t know if I could. I’d…I think if I had known and could have psyched myself up then yeah but right now I’m…I’m too excited.” She laughed her face glowed like a Christmas tree.

          They walked back to the Tardis. The tender moments between Lilly and James were gone. It officially was hitting her again. Lilly was like a bouncy puppy. “I…I…I just watched Elvis in concert. I literally just watched Elvis in concert. My…my…my hero was alive again and I got to see him. OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!” She squealed and it finally hit her. She bounced around like she was high on caffeine. They chuckled at her. She came up and gave James a kiss on the lips. Went to The Doctor and kissed him on the lips and then went to Rose and kissed her on the cheek. “I love you guys!” she started crying. “I just want you to know that. I … you guys are my family. I…sorry” she ran to her room.

“What was that about?” James asked.

“I think it finally hit her and now she’s coming down” The Doctor told him.

“Should I go and check on her?” James asked.

“No give her some time” Rose offered. “She’ll be ok.” James sat on the console. The Doctor piloted them back to New Earth. After a few moments Lilly came back to them. “I’m sorry” she said softly. “I was just so excited and overcome. You guys have no idea what that did for me. I suffer from major depressive disorder. When I was a kid and Matthew would do his thing, I’d put one of his records on or movies and I’d be transported to Graceland or Vegas or Hawaii. As a little girl, I always thought if I ever get married it would be like he did in _Blue Hawaii_. He helped me get through the hardest times in my life. Thank you guys so much.” She sat down next to James and snuggled up against him. “Are you ready for the last leg of our tour?” James asked. She looked up at him and smiled.

“Yes, I’ll go to the end of the earth with you” she kissed him sweetly.

          The Doctor and Rose left the Tardis on New Earth. That was their getaway. Even though they had to deal with cat nuns the first time they came it was still special to them. They said goodbye and James took control over the Tardis. “Alright love” he turned to Lilly “your destination is coming up. However, the Tardis has your final outfit ready. I’ll go change and we can go.” He smiled at her. She smiled at him and went up and held on to him. She needed to be next to him. “I love you my queen” he said softly in her ear.

“I love you too your lordship” she chuckled. They held on to each other for a few more moments. “If you’re tired or not ready to go we can wait a while.”

“No, I’m ready.” She smiled at him. “I just had to come down from my high.”

“Yeah the next place is probably a little anticlimactic but I had to get it in here.”

“Jamie, I don’t care where we go. As long as I’m with you I’m fine” she smiled at him. He kissed her and then patted her on the butt. “Ok go get dressed. I’ve been dying to see you in this again” he smiled and pushed her along. She smiled at him and left. He yelled “I hate to see you leave but I LOVE LOVE LOVE to watch you go” at her. She turned around and stuck her tongue out at him. “Later” he laughed. She squealed and ran to her room. He laughed and went to his room.

He actually liked the suit she picked out for him. He considered wearing it but he remembered the look on her face when she saw him in his tux. He took off his tie and then his vest. Slowly he put on the tuxedo and freshened up. He smiled at himself in the mirror and went to knock on her door. “Come in love” she said from behind the door. He walked in and saw her in the dress she wore to the wedding. She smiled at him just as big as he smiled her. “You might want to pack an overnight bag. We’re staying overnight.”

“Really? This is new!” she smiled at him. “Anything else I should pack?”

“That swimsuit again would be nice” he smiled at her. She laughed at him and the Tardis had a bag packed for her. “Wow she’s smart” she laughed.

“Well she’s been in on the planning as well”

“Of course, she has!” she laughed. “Ok my handsome prince where are we going to now?”

“Well I can tell you we’ll have a dog gone enjoyable time” he smiled at her took her hand and led her to the console. She laughed at him when they landed. “How come you and your brother are the exact same yet you land this so much better than he does?”

“I don’t know” he chuckled. He took her hand “come on!” and they went to the door. He opened it up and was going to let her deduce. “So, where are we?”

“You’ve heard of this place before. I want to see you deduce Sherlock.” She looked around nothing seemed familiar. _Oh, please let a dog walk by!_ They stepped out of the Tardis and walked hand in hand for a few moments. “I have no clue my dear Watson. I’ve never…” _yes! Someone loves me!_ just as soon as she said that there was a dog with no nose walk by. She looked at the dog for a long time. “That dog doesn’t have a nose!” she laughed. _3…2…1_ “OH MY GOD!” She turned and looked at him. He had an evil chuckle as he watched here. “Is…is…is this Barcelona?”

“Yes, it is!”

“Oh my God!” she laughed and smiled and hugged him. “You know all these years that’s one thing that has stuck with me. I even recorded an album in the city of Barcelona. I can’t believe I’m here. This place is BEAUTIFUL!”

They walked along the green grass of Barcelona. It was quite like earth and quite like the city itself. They walked along and the dogs even came up to Lilly. She pets them and laughed. “This is so great!”  They went to the little shops and toured the town. “Come on let’s go our hotel” The Doctor took her hand and they checked in. The hotel was nice. It was just as nice as some of the ones on Earth. “Except for the dogs I’d swear you took me back to Earth” she laughed and wrapped her arms around his waist. “Why would I do that?” he laughed. “There is one little tiny request I do have.” She smiled at him.

“What is it my love?”

“Around the first of March I do have to go back home.”

“Really?” His heart started breaking. “I thought…well…ok” he was suddenly down. If she told him this why did she have to do it now? He wasn’t ready to lose her. She smiled at him. “I know I’ve been hanging around you guys too long. I’ve picked up some of your phrases. You’re so daft” she laughed.

“Oh, you mean for a day or so?” he said relieved.

“Yes, you plum” she kissed him. “I have to go back because my alma mater is having their senior day. It’s a HUGE deal. I have been asked to sing the state song and the national anthem. Normally they sing the state song after the game but I told them I’d probably be too hoarse to. I’d love, love, love for the three of you too come but if you can’t that is fine.”

“Really? You want me to come to that?” he asked touched.

“Of course!” she smiled. “If you don’t want to it’s no problem. If it’s a bit to domestic I understand. You can pick me up a couple days after. I just wanted to share in a little of my traditions with you guys. Plus, did you meet my Uncle John when we met the first time?”

“Yes, I did” he smiled at her.

“I want him to come too. He’s the reason, well part of the reason, I get to do this. It’s a huge honor for me. I’ve never been asked to sing the national anthem. I want to do it at my home school. It’s also the end of the regular season and I have been good so far but you might have to make the media room sound proof when March comes.”

“Why what happens in March?”

“It’s the one time a year when I actually take a vacation from work. You can ask Lucas, if you ever meet Lucas. You know how Mickey and the British like soccer?”

“Football?”

“Uh yeah to me football is something different” she laughed. “But that’s how I am with basketball. My Uncle John got me into it when I was just barely old enough to sit on his knee.” She smiled at James. She doesn’t talk about her family much. He can see the light in her eyes when she talks about her uncle. “I could come to stay with him in March. I had a tutor for school. We’d stay up all night and watch the games. For one month, out of the year I felt like I had a dad.” She started to get emotional. “Lilly” he said softly and sat down next to her.

“I don’t know how much longer he’s going to be around so if I can bring him to see me sing that’s what I want to do. Besides you he’s my biggest hero. Damn I didn’t mean to do that! It’s Valentine’s Day love” she stood up and took his hand. She sniffled and fought the tears. “So, what are we going to do now?” She smiled at him. She was trying to be strong. They were both alike in not wanting to show their vulnerable side. His comes from being a Time Lord hers comes from another place. “Lilly” he stops her and makes her turn around. She looks up at him. “If you ever want to talk about your family. I don’t mind listening love.”

“I know but…” she trails off.

“It won’t hurt me baby I promise.” He can’t believe he just called her baby. That’s not something he’s ever said. The look on her face shows she’s surprised as well. She lets it go though. “Thank you love” she kisses him gently.

“Don’t ever be afraid to show your vulnerable side to me. That’s what I’m here for.”

“I know but I’m always the strong one for everyone else its just easier for me to stay that way unless you really get to me” she chuckled.

“Well I’m going to have to work on getting to you” he kissed her forehead. “There’s still a lot of things I don’t know about you.”

“There’s a lot of things I don’t know about you either gorgeous!” she smiled at him. “For example, I don’t even know when your birthday is!”

“It was a long time ago!” he laughed “I don’t even remember.”

“Come on Jamie you have to know. Besides how am I going to make you a cake for your birthday if you don’t tell me?”

“You’d make me a cake?”

“Well yeah love” she laughed “that’s what humans do. They celebrate birthdays with cakes and presents.”

“Can I make up a date?” he smiles at her.

“No” she laughed. “I know you! You’d say one day then the next then the next to keep getting cake.”

“You do know me well” he kissed her. “Since Gallifrey is different from Earth I’m not sure when it would be. Why would it matter besides cake?” he laughed at her. “Because it matters to me. It’s something I get to celebrate with you.”

“We can celebrate yours, Christmas all those other silly human things.”

“You’d really like my cake” she teases him. “I can’t cook but I make a mean ass cake” she smiles seductively at him.

“Alright then what was the day we met?”

“I don’t know. I know it wait the first time it was October 21.”

“Ok then that”

“No” she punched his arm playfully. “The time we met like this was around thanksgiving in the u.s. so it was around November 20th or something.”

“Ok then because that’s when my life started when I met you.” He said sweetly.

“Oh my god” she laughed. “You are picking up one male human habit.”

“What?” he asked innocently.

“Bad pickup lines” she kissed his cheek.

“It’s true” he smiled and took her hand. “I found you and I found myself again.”

“You’re so sweet especially when you’re trying to get out of something” she laughed. “Come on gorgeous. What is it we’re going to do here?”

“Have dinner for starters” he took her hand and led her out the door. “I know you though you won’t give this up, will you?”

“None” she popped the p. He looked at her and grinned. “What? You’re not the only one that picks up habits” she laughed at him.

          They went to a restaurant. It was a very nice. It wasn’t lost on them that the translation of the restaurant was restaurant of the stars. It was very romantic. They got a private table away from everyone. “Jamie this is beautiful!” She smiled at him. He was proud of himself. He did an excellent job. They ordered their food. It was scrumptious. “So, I’ve been thinking. Since you don’t know your birthday what was the day the stars went out and you were created?”

“Lilly, I don’t really want to talk about that please” he said solemnly.

“I’m sorry” she said quietly. They were quiet for a while. There was an awkwardness between them now. James didn’t want to keep it going yet he couldn’t think of things to talk about. They had a really wonderful day today and it came down to this. “So, does this place have a beach we can go to?”

“Yeah it does it’s a nice beach. It’s not as nice as the pink beach but it’s nice” he smiled at her. She smiled back. He missed the flirting they were doing all day. The waitress came by and they ordered desert. He got a banana desert and she ordered strawberry. It was beautifully plated. “This food is so good. You’ll have to bring me back here again.” She smiled at him. He smiled back at her and finished his desert. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have been so pushy about the birthday thing. I guess it’s just you get to celebrate silly little human things with me I wanted to celebrate something with you. Don’t be mad at me sweetheart.”

“I’m not mad love” he smiled at her. He wasn’t either. He took her hand. “I promise” he winked at her. “It’s just not something we celebrated on Gallifrey.”

“Will you ever tell me about home?”

“I might someday.”

“Ok love you know me and my curiosity” she laughed.

“Yeah and someday I’ll tell you all about it” he kissed her hand. “Come on let’s get out of here and go for a walk on the beach.”

          After paying the waitress they went outside. There was a party going on next door. They were invited. They laughed as they crashed someone’s party. They started dancing and laughing and having an enjoyable time. It wasn’t the flirty time like before but it was still fun. James got to dance close with Lilly. He held her close to him and smelled her shampoo then he smelled her perfume. “God Lilly, I love this perfume you have on.”

“Sweet Pea knows me so well. She knows I have a massive perfume collection. I literally at home have over 150 bottles. She’s brought some of my favorites on board. If you ever want to get me anything you can get me perfume. I love the stuff.”

“How in the world can you have that much perfume?”

“I do” she chuckled. “It’s about the only girly thing I do have. I should take you to my house one day. No wait Lucas and Jacob live there too God knows what it looks like” she laughed.

“Lucas and Jacob both live there?”

“Yeah I’m either at work or on the road. Jacob’s usually on the road. Lucas he’s working or on the road so its rare that all three of us are there. Jacob mostly stays when he comes to town. We were trying the dating thing before I met you. It didn’t work out though.”

“Why?”

“Because I met you” she laughed. “And he’s too much like Lucas. He’s a player. I don’t want someone that goes from one girl to another to another. I’m too old for that shit. So now he’s like another brother.”

“Do you have any brothers?”

“No Lucas could be I guess. We did the whole cut your finger and stick it to one another thing when we were kids. So, I’ve always called him my blood brother but we’re not biologically related.”

“I had a brother. His name was Irving Braxiatel.”

“What happened to him?”

“I don’t know. I even had a granddaughter Susan. She’s the one that named the Tardis.”

“Really? What happened to her?”

“She used to travel with me way back in my first incarnation. She fell in love with someone and I locked her out of the Tardis to start a life with him. This was in the 22nd century. I don’t know anything else about her. Then Donna” he caught himself. He misses her. “Let’s go for the walk on the beach, shall we?” he smiled and took her hand. “How many times have you been here?” He was thankful she dropped the subject when he mentioned Donna. “Oh a few” he smiled glad she’s not going on farther about his family. She slipped off her shoes and were holding them in her hand. “I can take those love.” He reached out for them. “Sweetheart you don’t have to carry my shoes I can.”

“I can put them in my pockets.”

“Honey they’re…you know what your jacket the pockets go on forever.” She laughed like she just noticed that. “That’s because they’re bigger on the inside” he smiled at her. She chuckled “you know now that sounds like some kind of joke” she handed her shoes over. He put them in and no one would even know looking at them he had her shoes in his coat. “So, you know about my thing about Elvis do you have any personal heroes?”

“Yeah I met her”

“Who?”

“You” he kissed her nose. She laughed and batted at him.

“You’re so silly”

“I met Shakespeare once with Martha.”

“Who’s Martha?”

“Your friend Martha Jones”

“What?”

“Yeah we went to the moon together.”

“Really?” she didn’t believe him.  
“Yeah we did” he chuckled and took her hand. They were swinging them back and forth. “I checked into the hospital.”

“What was wrong with you?” she looked concerned.

“Nothing love it was a ruse” he smiled at her. “I knew something was going on and I had to check in. Of course, that night the Judoon took us to the moon. Judoon platoon on the moon” he chuckled at that. “I still love saying that.”

“I remember her telling me about that! She said she was with some alien called the doctor and they were on the moon. Oh my god” she laughed. “I never all this time put two and two together. As you guys would say I am so thick” she laughed. “So how did you guys meet Shakespeare? Wait that reminds me and God I should have done this a long time ago. I need to know some medical history love just in case something happens and your brother isn’t around. Are you allergic to anything or anything I should know about?”

“Yes! Yes, I’m glad you mentioned it. I didn’t think about it either. Aspirin do not give me aspirin I’m deathly allergic to it. Well Time Lords are I assume I still am. So, don’t give it to my brother either. What about you?”

“Believe it or not epinephrine.”

“Really? You are allergic to the stuff you give someone that’s having an allergic reaction?”

“Yes” they laughed “as classic as that sounds I’m allergic to it.”

“What does it do?”

“I have a severe, severe panic attack. So about you and Martha tell about Shakespeare.”

“Wellll” he started. She took his hand and snuggled up against his arm. “For saving my life I thought I’d give her one quick trip in the Tardis. So, we went to England 1599. We saw _Loves Labors Lost_. He was going to write _Loves Labors Won_. Some Carrionites got ahold of him.”

“Carrionites?”

“Witches”

“Seriously? Broomstick ugly noses the whole nine yards?”

“Yeah one tried to seduce me” that sent Lilly over the edge.

“You were seduced by a witch!?” she was cracking up. He started smiling at her.

“I did say TRY now Lils. It didn’t work. It was just after I lost Rose and I wasn’t in the mood to go down that road.”

“Aa witch?” she couldn’t stop going on about it. “Ooh I would hope she’d say I’d get you my pretty” she was cracking up. “Ok…ok…I’m sorry. I know what to dress up for as Halloween now” she was gasping for air. James had no clue what was so funny. “She killed people Lils.” That got her to shut up.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t realize that.” She looked down “a witch?”

“Ok enough of the Shakespeare story” he laughed. “No, we stopped her. However, Shakespeare took a liking to Martha. He was hitting on her.”

“Well she is pretty”

“She fancied me as well.”

“Oh my God you have them crawling all over you.” She laughed. “Even me well at least I’m not a witch” she was cracking up.

“Oh you can be when you want to be” he laughed at her.

“Don’t make me get my broomstick out!” she laughed at him.

“Maybe later?”

“Oh yeah definitely later” she kissed his cheek. “So, Martha did say she travelled with you.”

“Yeah we went to New Earth.”

“What Doc and Roses’ New Earth?”

“Yep” he popped the p.

“You serious?”

“Yeah why not?” She hit his arm.

“You igit. You don’t take a girl to the same planet as the one you lost” she laughed. “Well I wanted to take her to the future.”

“So, you take her to Roses’ favorite place?”

“Wellll now that you mention it…it was him not me” he smiled at her.

“Oh, you just think you’re so cute don’t you” she pinched his cheek.

“I am so cute” he pinched hers back. “So, we travelled on for a bit saved New Earth. Went to New York in the 30s.”

“Oh, I want to go in the 20s! I love love love swing music. I’d love to see Benny Goodman and be a flapper girl. Then go and dance with Gene Kelly and Fred Astaire.”

“I can see you being a flapper girl.” He smiled to himself.

“Dance the Charleston.” She started demonstrating it for him.

“You’re pretty good” he laughed at her.

“Oh, I used to be a professional dancer as a kid”

“Really?”

“Yeah Lucas got in trouble so my … Matthew punished him by putting him in ballroom dancing classes. He didn’t want to do it and made me do it with him. That was until he found out there were girls in the classes and he was the hit amongst them” she laughed. “Come on twinkle toes dance with me” she grabbed his hand and made him dance with her. He was having an enjoyable time but mostly because of the joy on Lilly’s face. “Come here my little flapper girl” he grabbed her by the waist and pulled her close to him. “I just love you” he smiled at her. “I love you too” she smiled back. “So what happened after Martha? I know she left on her own. I think it was because of unrequited love” she batted her eyelashes at him. “You and your charisma are going to be the death of you” she laughed. “No actually your charisma and some girl hitting on you and me killing you will be the death of you” they both laughed.

“Now Lils you know I only have one heart and it beats for you.”

“I take that back your cheesy pick up lines are going to be the death of you” she laughed “but I love it anyways.” She leaned up and kissed him.

“I travelled on my own for a bit. Then one night I met…” he stopped himself. It was painful to talk about Donna. “So, tell me more about yourself” he smiled at her. “It’s ok to talk about her Jamie.” She said softly.

“I know it…it just…it hurts.”

“I’m sorry love.”

“She was funny I tell you. She was something else. She’s a lot like you very, very feisty. She always called me spaceman. She kept saying I was from Mars but she had a heart of gold.”

“Does it bother you when I call you my favorite Martian?”

“No” he smiled at her “I love it. I think it’s cute.”

“Hey though she’s alive, though right? So, it’s just like it was before she met you.”

“Yeah she is.”

“I wish I could thank her”

“For what?”

“Without her help, I wouldn’t have you.  She gave me the greatest gift of all, even better than saving the universe.” She smiled at him. He grabbed her and kissed her forehead and then held her head close to him. “May 12th”

“What about it?”

“I want that to be my birthday.”

“Why?”

“Because that’s Donna’s birthday.”

“Ok my prince May 12th it is then my little bull.” She laughed at him.

“Bull?”

“Yeah then you’d be a Taurus which is awesome because I’m a Capricorn and then we are really compatible.”

“Do you believe in that stuff Lils” he chuckled.

“No but I find it interesting to study” she laughed.

          They walked along the beach for a long time. Sometimes they didn’t say anything sometimes they flirted with each other and other times they just held each other’s hands and kissed. “Jamie thank you for all the trouble you went through to do this for me. I appreciate it more than you know.”

“Lilliana, it was no trouble at all. The only trouble I had is actually waiting till today instead of jumping ahead.” He laughed “but you my love are worth everything to me. I’d do anything in the world to make you happy.”

“Will you find another occasion to wear that suit again” she smiled at him. “I was so shocked I didn’t get to really enjoy it. I have to say though I’m making up for it with this tux” she checked him out.

“Can I get you to wear the go-go dress?”

“Oh yeah. I’m keeping that thing I liked it” she laughed. “If I have to go to some awards show I might actually wear it.”

“Awards show?”

“Yeah a few times a year they have them and I have to go. I told them I wasn’t going this year. I told them I was travelling with the love of my life and I wouldn’t be around. They think I’m in Barcelona Spain or something.”

“So, no one knows the truth?”

“Except Jack of course. I don’t know if Lucas and Jacob believe him.”

“So, do you have to sing at these?”

“Sometimes most of the time I sit there and smile while they give the award to someone else.”

“Why would they do that?”

“I’m an outsider. I do what I want and piss the rest of them. I’m not in the good ole boys club so they give it to someone else.”

“That’s sounds stupid”

“It is that’s why I don’t care if I go.”

“What if you win?”

“Lucas can get it for me. Awards and things like that don’t mean anything to me. It’s all for show and look at me look at me. I’d go to hang out with Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman.”

“Oh, I like her!” he smiled cheekily.

“Oh, I like him!” she did the same.

“When’s one of these shows?”

“You want to go?”

“I might” he grinned.

“I don’t know later this month April I don’t know. I just go when I’m told. Why would you want to go?”

“I like to hear you sing” he smiled big.

“Really?”

“Yeah”

“Really?” she asked surprised.

“Of course, love. You have a beautiful voice. I’ve heard you sing opera in the shower.”

“Really” she wasn’t too thrilled.

“Well I’ve been in your room looking for you and I’d hear you sing.”

“Oh god” she blushed.

“That’s why I’m s surprised no one gives you awards.”

“Thank you love I appreciate it.”

          The sun went down and it was dark. They sat out on the beach and looked up at the stars. “Do you know the names of these stars? They’re different from mine.”

“Yeah I do” he looked down at her. She was looking up at the sky. The moonlight from both moons hit her hair. It shined like diamonds. He kept staring at her as she looked up. He never planned on asking her but seeing her like that it really made things clear. If he was ever going to marry someone again, it would be her. He was overcome with emotion. He leaned down and whispered in her ear. “I love you my queen” in Gallifreyan. She looked at him and put her hand on his cheek. Her eyes danced with his. “I love you too” she smiled. He looked at her surprised and confused. “I just know” was all she’d say. She kissed him tenderly. She took his hand and entwined her fingers with his. She pulled their hands up to her chest and held it against her heart. He pulled his head away and looked into her eyes. He lifted her to her feet after he got up. They didn’t have to say anything as they looked at each other and smiled. They walked back to their hotel room. Lilly walked in first followed by James. He sat the room key on the table next to the door. As he closed the door he was taking off his bow tie. She walked up to him and helped him to unfasten it. She slid it off his neck. She looked up at him with a smile on her face. He leaned down and kissed her tenderly. Her hands went around his neck and he pulled her closer to him. “Lilly my queen”

“Yes, my prince”

“I love you” he picked her up and carried her over to the bed. He laid her down gently and took his hand and brushed his fingertips against her cheek. He could see the tiger in her eyes. She reached up and unbuttoned the first few buttons of his shirt. He smiled at her. His hands went to her lower back. She smiled saucily at him. They kissed passionately as she removed the shirt from his pants and finished unbuttoning it. His hands were now hungry on her back. Hers were the same on his. He unzipped the back of her dress and let it fall. She let out a small breath and as nervous as he could feel she was, she was just as excited as well. “Are you ok Lilly?” he asked tenderly.

“God Jamie I’ve never been better” she laughed a nervous giggle and pulled him on top of her. The kiss she gave him was all that he needed to continue.  Later had finally come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well i tried to post a picture not sure it works but these are the two men about in this chapter.
> 
> https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/44/be/48/44be484b73f3afe78b55a62c7c478f19.jpg  
> that's ^^^ "jamie"
> 
> https://onceuponascreen.files.wordpress.com/2016/01/el11.jpg?w=798 this is the other one
> 
> i tried to do this yesterday being the 40th anniversary but ya know couldnt


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